h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

.... That my mother would stoop to the level of giving me a "time out" chair on my front porch. She said I was to sit there until I sorted/straightened myself out which meant (I discovered when I thought I was straightened or at least thoroughly less crooked) when I was nice. How am I supposed to be nice after sitting in a chair for seven hours?

Note to the curious: I did get up once or twice and try to be, if not nice, then not hostile. Didn't work. She wasn't in a good mood today.)

So, finally, she gave up and sent my dad out to have a "talk" over "things" (which, I also discovered, expands into "things I'm doing wrong"). My dad is an odd combination. He gets mad really, really easily sometimes but he also knows it so he sometimes is amazingly compromising. He, in any case, was in a better mood than my mom and admitted she had made a mistake in punishing me to make me be nice. This is getting to be rather long so I'll finish it saying my parents and I made a compromise wherein I will be friendly and do whatever they tell me to do and they get to do whatever they want .... hey, wait, this isn't fair!