h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

bet that made you jump.. we have spoken before haven`t we? i know your on the staff list for the tea shoppe.
if you don`t mind me asking where abouts in the country is your abode?
anywhere near where i am?

Chuck

Gosh !!!!! You scared me half to death then hahahahaha Hello again.Yes we have spoken before,how you doing ? If you tell me where you live ,I can tell you just how close we are hahahahaha Am I making sense ?? I AM ??? WOW,thats ts unusual for me hahahaha Catch you later Take care Love Pinky xxx

I am like the Scarlet Pimpernel (they seek him here they seek him there) I live on the south coast near to Plymouth, I got off the ship liked what i saw and stayed. so where are you Pinky?

lol sailor sam our pinky is a wigan lass by the way did u used to be a fireman

And is no-one allowed to speak to her without you butting in?
By the wa did you used to be Human

hahahahaha well its just that i new a fireman called sam and i just told u pinkys from wigan does that not make me human in ur book huh mabe its all that rum bum and mouth organ ur used too mr perfecto

I`m sure if Pinky wanted to tell me that she is quite capable of doing it herself.
i have seen your name on all her conversations. what is your hang up did she turn you down?
and as regards the rum bum etc i am in Wigan in a few days i am ex marine
and if you like i will meet you anywhere you like and see if you can say that to my face without wetting your nappy.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh iam shaking in my shoes now cos see iam ex army so come on little sea trout

ok Action man name your time and place and i will be there
will you?
i doubt it

Hi Sam,please ignore shifty(he is a patient of mine and needs constant TLC ) hahahaha I haven't even been to Wigan incidently,but shifty wants me to take him there,a day out you understand,he gets out so seldom !!!I live in Blackpool,originate from Sunderland ,N\East and I AM a florist ,in the real world I mean .....Please don't get up upset with shifty he is a pussycat really,I've heard him roar hahahaha Take Care see you soon Love Pinky xxx TIG,get back into your cage RIGHT NOW !!! hahhahahaha xxx

oh thanks a lot

nurse i need my med now i think the village people are comming to get me ,backs ta the wall matey now where did my pills go mmmmmmm

action man well thats it sammy name the place time il meet u in the y m c a in wigan ok

2pm wednesday and you can forget medication you wont need it when i have finished with you.
I was willing to give you a chance for the sake of not upsetting pinky but your just to stupid to take the chance.. see you wednesday

oh and u think ur some thing specail do you u give me a chance who do you think u are mr high and mighty ,i have been mates with pinky for ages a lot longer than you and if pinky dont want to speak to me or have me chat to her in the msgs on here i think its up to her to tell me as it has nowt to do with you ,all i said to you was did you used to be a fireman as in fireman sam just a bit of humour but u see theres people on this earth that cant take a joke love to think they know it all you seem to fit that bill ......

Look, wouldn't it be a nicer idea for us all to meet up here on Wednesday ?? We could have a coffee and talk ,PEACEFULLY !! PLEASE !!! Let me know the time I'll be here !! Love to both Pinky xxx

well no probs to me i done nowt to be ashamed of i give out as good as i get but if someone trys to tell who or who i cant chat with or there abouts beware iam a man in unstable mind iam just out for 2 hours a day i mean wigans no place for a mental person to walk the streets anything could happen in my state of mind ok ok iam sorry for the sailor jokes but its the bit that i followed u around like we had something going that iam not putting up with ......shug

A depressed young woman from a Manhattan finishing school was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean.
When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said, "Look, you've got a lot to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day."

"Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy."

The girl nodded. What did she have to lose?

That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn.

Three weeks later, during a routine search, she was discovered by the captain. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

"I had an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained. "He's taking me to Europe, and every night he came and screwed me."

"He sure did, lady," said the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry."

Hahahahahahaha MMMMMMM there must be a moral to this story !!!!! Just can't think of what it could possibly be at the moment !!!!!! Oh well,I'm sure you'll tell me Tig hahaha Love Pinky xxxxxxx