h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Today Pete the DJ was shocked at the number of elderly people who will be alone on Christmas day in the West Midlands alone - about 30,000 (I can't find a link to any news story so this is completely heresay). That's a lot of people.

A woman called in who had lost her husband of 45 years 6 months ago and she wasn't looking forward to Christmas at all. She said how hard it was seeing Christmas everywhere and feeling lonely, some days she only had the radio for company.

Pete wondered if they could get something going for Christmas morning - he's broadcasting live and he thought maybe they could get just a few of these pensioners in to have a bit of a party. I thought that was a lovely idea, it brought tears to my eyes - but I bet there'll be a health & safety reason why it can't go ahead.

I lost my husband in May 2006 so I've now spent 7 Christmases without him. But I had his dad to stay for the first 5 years so wasn't alone on Christmas morning. The last two years that wasn't possible so I was alone first thing, and I quite liked it, to be honest. I got up to no-one's timetable but my own, watched the dog open his presents*, had a nice walk on my local field where I exchanged merry christmases with other dog walkers, had a nice leisurely breakfast whilst catching up on h2g2 conversations.

But alone and lonely are two different things, of course. On both those two years I knew that later on I'd be with my family for hours, and that the next day was another family party. I knew that by the end of boxing day I'd be anticipating some peace & quiet.

I do kind of understand how it feels to be lonely at Christmas, although I wasn't actually alone that year. I was 20, I'd moved away from home (Orkney) to work at a hotel in Hertfordshire in November and had to work up until mid-afternoon on Christmas eve. This left me with no-where near enough time to get home to my mum so I arranged to spend the holidays with my nan in Derby. She spent a lot of time sleeping and wasn't really interested in Christmas (in hindsight I think she was probably quite ill) so there were no decorations and dinner was roast chicken. My mum goes all out at Christmas so it was a really shocking difference for me - I was homesick enough anyway, and I really was quite miserable. When my nan died in the January I was glad that I got to spend that week with her , but on Christmas day I really did feel lonely.

Deb

*Yes, I know I'm sad. I don't care. I enjoy watching him open them and he seems to have great fun tearing at the paper (and continuing to tear at the paper after the gift has been shaken out - I could save myself a fortune).

I never minded being by myself at Christmas because I had friends and neighbors, not to mention five cats. No special cooking, no need to dress up as in former years. But now I'm at Ladera I don't look forward to it at all. Last year we had bad food and the internet went down on the 23rd and stayed down until 1 January. But the PA system bombarded us with tinny carols and we got live carollers who were more curious about thee inside of a nursing home than in singing carols, and we got Christmas cards hand-made by fourth graders, and no, I did not enjoy it.

This year, I may close the door. Bah. Humbug.

Christma is often a strange time of year... It was near Christmas that who would have been my older Brother (I never knew him), died, and also just before Christmas when I was younger, when my Mother died, plus my accident and loosing my sight, albeit on the 10 December, meant I was in a coma over that* Christmas, and so in our family at least, there seem to be as many 'bad things' linked into the season as good things...
I've always had Christmas at my Dad's (cept for the one year I was in a coma), and so Christmas has 'become' that... this year is my first year not there as Dad and co are heading off for a holiday over the Christmas period; so I'll be spending it at mine for the first time...
I o won't do decorations, and wo't do a 'traditional Christmas' meal, and proabably won't consume 1/100 of the alcohol that Christmas at my ads includes... but realy, those* things; the trd turkey and trimmings, the booze, etc., that is 'Christmas at my Dads', and thisyear I'm kinda looking forward to doing soemthign differnt (Helped by the fact I'll have the time here, with William ).... Sotraditions out of the windo and something a bit differnt

What on Earth is sad about watching the doggy open her/his Christmas pressy!? we always do that when I'm at my Dad's! (and yes, last year one of the oo, *counts* maybe four Christmas cards I sent, was to the dog!)

now... Christmas day dinner... turkey curry, loverly warming beef stew and dumplings, fish, or something even less appropiate? Im doing a 'Polish Christmas eve', supper, which isby tradition vegetarian; some kind of veg soup (proabably leek and Stilton), with mushroom 'mouse ear' dumplings (suddenly forgotten the word for them... ahh, uska (ushka?), and maybe then salmon for mains or I may do the salmon with veg and mash etc, for Xmas day... mmm... Bubble n squeek and salmon I'm making tons of bread of various kinds, spending a fortune in the decent cheese shop, ad hopfully getting a small boned gamon joint/hock of ham, to cook up, plus making sausage rolls, and soem other savory 'bites', and I'll probably just end up buying some minced pies and other sweet stuff in

However, I still do get to have a traditional Christmas roast; tomorrow in fact as we're off out for a meal with my ten pin bowling group (yeh, a bit early though but, never mind... )

and I just bought myself a Christmas present.... though I'll not wait until Christas to give it to myself (new boots)

Just heard over the PA system -- a rocknroll version of Jingle Bells. It has started. Six weeks of involuntary exposure to Christmas music.

My Christmas music, and my decs, will start on 1st December. I love all the tinsel & cheese of the season, and all the traditional stuff on the day. But that's because it's so much of a family tradition and it's more special these days because of my brother's 3 kids. At 6, 5 & 3 it's still really awe-inspiring to them so it's really a lot of fun.

I'm usually glad when boxing day is out of the way, though. I then have a few days of peace & quiet, just long walks with the dog and long sessions eating too much in front of the TV

Deb

[Amy P]

>>But alone and lonely are two different things>>

Amen to that! I actually enjoy living on my own.

As for the subject line, it reminds me of this song. I've grown up with the Mary Hopkin version:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-kgGcfT7nc

Oh drat, wrong song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjEu5vlRfiY

I've gotten to like livig alone too (well I do have the lodger here), and I've gotten to I guess like it... and its freedom... In some ways, its a bit scary the idea of (soon I hope), living with William, perminatly... Although on balance, I think the prospects that offers might outweigh staying on my own but it still makesit a slighlyscarey thing to want to do...

After 7½ years living on my own I think I'd find it hard to budge up and accommodate someone else

Deb