h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hello Cass,

Just to lt you know that while you might not be around you are not forgotton
Don't tell Mrs Cass but every night recently has been hedgehog party night in my back garden, quite, er, rowdy they are, all I ask is that bring the hoglets back for a visit
I hope your fence is standing strong and all is well with you and your family

Peanut

Hi Peanut

Just back and unloaded the car, up-dated my security and looked through old fashioned and email-- most of both "junk"- 387 emails ?.

Your hedgehog parties may well have been around the time of a full-moon- no doubt doubly significant at this full-on springtime.

As for the fence it had to take second place to building an vegetable-plot path, an "anti-radiation" enclosure cupboard for the electrics and trying (unsuccessfully it seemed this morning) to repair and restore the rain-barrels.

And here we have come back to find more DIY tasks from the wild weather.

Hope you and Hiccup have been keeping well.

Cass

Hi Cass

It is good to see you back

The weather has been wild you were away, hope there wasn't to much damage. Hedgehogs are doing well but a noticeable drop in bird numbers this year.

The sun didn't play ball for either the transit or the Solstice but we have been enjoying early morning walks. Caught a lovely sunrise on the Tor last week. Hiccup has finished her exams so has left school

Peanut

Morning Peanut

Wild just about sums it up!.. Mrs Cass was looking out at the garden on some despair this morning- a combination of various bits of storm damage n.b. the collapse of our new rose arch.. with collateral damage. But it always seemed too weak and inadequate when we put it up last summer, replacing a similar (and cheap) one.. But -as in our place in France- there is a now familiar 'just-back' shock because this "nice weather for ducks" seems also to be relished by almost anything with foiliage, and it looks like a bit of wilderness out there.

Mention of the solstice reminds me that our Druid friend's summer solstice poems email was one that arrived yesterday. And fingers crossed for Hiccups exams.. a key moment now to target next objectives. You have mentioned college. What courses?

Cass

Morning Cass,

Now that I have thought about how difficult I have found it to keep up with my patch of garden this past weeks I can see why Mrs Cass is looking out with some dispair.

Hiccup has a place on a health and social care course which she is keen on. She has been considering re-taking her GCSEs, some of that depends on grades but also the option of A'levels are still not off the table.

There are lots of open days, preparation days and opportunities to talk things over with the college over the holidays.

Her targets over the holidays are to go that process and engage with those opportunities and to set herself some personal objectives

How's your family?

Peanut

Hi Peanut

I have been sitting mulling over your post..

What my wife actually said first thing yesterday morning looking out at the garden was that she was feeling suicidal. This seems to be a fairly standard reaction now as part of our 4 annual trips to France and back.

As I have frequently observed, my view of France and the French is obviously shaped by my own personal experiences and I am not surprised that one French historical work was entitled "The People of Disaster". In fact I watched a very interesting TV documantary on Arte on Tuesday which compiled European Pathe News coverage from 1939-40- the period I think that that book covers.

But then I have long suspected that one of the things that attracted me to my wife in 1965 was a feeling that we were both to some extent "refugees" seeking to build a better life- probably both "bipolar" in our emotional swings and roundabouts from suicidal to murderous tendencies. One of the first things we did together was to create a ballet that was danced by the ballet class that she taught all around the theme of "Hiroshima". Apparently it really had some impact on sleepy little Dijon. I was in Cardiff for the public performance, but I had the privilege of having the whole thing danced for me-alone when I next managed to get over to France.

But from my English/"Anglo-Saxon" background it seems very typical of the French that (as in 1940), having apparently teamed up with the UK [President Sarkozy took France along the Anglo-Saxon route- UK, USA and Germany- in which it is down to communal and collective effort to overcome the challenge of the Present "We will fight them on the beaches etc"] the French have fallen back on the dream of vesting some "overlord" with absolute power, who will then put everything right.

The previous volume to the People of Disaster is entitled "Forty Million Petainists" because in 1940, when the French under Petain signed the Armistice and accepted collaboration, most French people were quite happy to embrace this idea that there was an alternative to fighting Nazism, just as the recent elections have produced a majority in favour of Monsieur Holland's Socialist Party argument that there is an alternative to "austerity". There is, but not through "statist" thinking and existing financial instruments.

While camping I shared my theory with some fellow campers that the French have never really recovered from the reign of Saint Louis one of the greatest periods of European history in the Middle Ages. With the power of the State in the hands of a "Saint" the people can expect excellent "top-down government". "Saint Louis" using men who were in effect like the modern "Technocrats" rather than politicians. My neighbours could see at least how it might appear like this to an Englishman for the French people have never learned the skills mastered by the English people of exercising the "sovereignty of the people".(And of course since England had to be changed to fit in with the UK the English lost much of that tradition)

At a domestic level in the Cass household Mrs Cass aspires to the status of a saintly absolute monarch who really wants to feel in total control of her world in the minutest detail, and is frequently exasperated by the fact that this is just not humanly possible, especially as (for example with weeding) she refuses to use things like weedkillers and other useful aids, though she now swears by organic slug-pellets.

'Organics' and homeopathy are her two 'religions'- but neither actually seem to help her where he enslavement to nicotine is concerned.

Cass

Perhaps I should add "Moonworship" to my wife's various personal faiths- Moonworship as dictated by the analysis of "Lunar Gardening" day by day and hour by hour as produced by her favourite French website which she tries to follow religiously.. Today was a "greens day" so her lettuce had to be planted whatever rain or wind or light-conditions.

Cass

Morning Cass



I can't imagine managing two homes given my skill level at managing one

My garden is organic at the moment. I am weed tolerant and my idea of gardening is pretty much managing what is there, I think Mrs Cass would be despairing of my garden, I know my Mum groans inside as she keeps an immaculate garden too. I say organic at the moment, it is an ideal for me but there are times when I would resort to chemical methods. It is very much last resort.

Will Mrs cass be feeling better soon, you say it is an expected reaction is there a timeline?

Peanut

Morning Peanut

I too try to grow organically and have had an allotment for c25 years where I am quite fussy about what I put into the ground that feeds us. But I must confess to having felt very much like Mao Tse Tung, as expressed in his 'little red book', that there is nothing more beautiful than lovely veg (and trees), and it has taken some time to be won over to the idea of flower-gardening. But [as on other issues] we [me and you] see to have much in common re believing in letting Nature "get on with it" most of the time.

There was a very interesting series of programmes about France a few months ago, and the acerbic commentator picked up on the French obsession with imposing "the Triumph of Will" over Nature. It is not just my wife, it seems, who has to be constantly hacking and pruning at trees and bushes. And D.H.Lawrence commented back in the twenties on the fact that women just can not enjoy flowers and let them be, the way that men can, but feel that they must capture and possess them and bring them to decorate their houses in a slow death. Certainly this applies to Mrs Cass who when we are out walking is constantly picking flowers and other things for "flower arrangements", not to mention digging up plants to transplant into our gardens. We always travel with trays of plants both ways, gradually marrying the English and French ecosystems.

As for how long Mrs Cass's suicidal periods last, usually the changeover times are the worst. The "catastophe"- as noted by friends who weekly visit when we are away- was that the arch of covered with red and white roses that we installed last autumn had collapsed under the strong winds, and collapsed on to other plants. In truth I always thought that the cheap £6 arch was not "up to it" now that the roses have grown so much.

Mrs Cass was greatly relieved when I found the time to go and lift it back into position and in fact manage to restore it so successfully that it has withstood the strong winds since Thursday. I did offer to build a new one. But Mrs Cass does not believe the season is conducive to pruning and has been content with just restoring some semblance of order with some overgrown and overblown bushes. She has even accepted my suggestion that the overgrowing and overblowing are connected, and has lightly pruned some long and strandly growth- blaming herself for having given a feed of Bone Meal just before we left (Bone Meal helping "wood" growth)

I also volunteered to use our garden shredder to shred such nice cuttings for the compost bins.

The other major thing looking out at the "jungle" was the sight of the overgrown lawn. I usually do the lawn in France and she does in London [these days] largely on physical grounds. Mrs Cass went down to 42 kilos last week. So yesterday morning I volunteered to do an initial first cut of the long grass, which I can achieve by holding the lawnmower actually off the ground if necessary- though in fact just the highest setting and tilting backwards to lift the front was enough. Mrs Cass has her own ideas about cutting the lawn to get stripes etc. But it is amazing how much impact a cut-lawn has.

So things have got better. But "The People of Disaster" are always (it seems) looking out for disaster and catastrophe.

Another of my English-perspective ideas that I have discussed with French camping friends, is the French "compensations culture". The French may sometimes be "gay" and festive, but rarely happy in an English sense. Their lifestyles are too insecure. But French life with all its dangers also comes complete with appetites of one kind or another, and making the most out of satisfying the appetites can compensate for the "downside of living". Hence Dijon is famous as a centre of "Gastronomie"- food and drink. And French inventiveness and ingenuity have found very full expression in the "haute culture" of food, drink and sex. Have you seen "Chocolat", or "Le Divorce"?

My wife, however, like many teenage girls took to smoking in order to kill off the appetite that would have destroyed her balletic shape: and she makes use of moments of "disaster and catastrophe" as times when she can go into the garage and have a smoke, or just binge on chocolate.

Just getting back to weedkilling. I have to say that I am not so opposed to those products that are applied just to the foiliage of the plant that you want to get rid of, and only act upon the process of photosynthesis. But what I do in France- as in the garden path- is dig out at least a half-spade depth,taking out all the roots, put down an appropriate membrane and cover with 8-9 centimetres of small gravel, keeping the flower and vegetable beds to a reasonable size that is easier to maintain.

If a job is worth doing it is worth doing properly. But probably the key to our future is the fact that I have spent far too long trying to write books and complete the task of historical understanding that I set myself about 58 years ago. There is so much DIY waiting for me to undertake and complete: and then there is my music too!

Cass

Morning Cass

Cutting the grass and indoors hoovering and sweeping the house are two tasks that have that impact.

My garden is very,um, natural or inherited, I don't cultivate much.
42kg is very light, I hope Mrs Cass finds that her activities in the garden and the fact that order is being restored, stimulates her appetite, hopefully away from

On weed killing, I am removing hogweed manually , I think I can do it without resorting to chemicals. I have two 'saplings' that have taken hold, one near a wall and one near a drain, reluctantly am going to treat those roots, which is the first time I have used such stuff in this garden. If a rhododendron planted itself I wouldn't hesitate

Peanut

Hi Peanut

Re hoovering and sweeping, it must have been in France in March that I called Mrs Cass to see a TV sales advert for a steam cleaner, for she has spent too many hours in her knickers on her hands and knees scrubbing floors over the years. It looked like a perfect answer, just using pure water turned into steam. She subsequently investigated and bought one over the internet, and this has become another faith item. She has one in each house and insisted that her mother should buy one too.

You are right about 42k. Everyone in the family tells her she is too skeletal, but she has almost a mild form of anorhrexia and just cannot see herself as others do. But perhaps that is true of us all. She is keen on her camcorder and I am often appalled as the sight of this old man that I am becoming.

Last night Miriam Margoles commented on the Radio that she is nearly 71 and feels entitled to just retire gracefully as an old lady. When we were in France I suddenty thought that in 12 years I will be eighty! That really does sound ancient if I get there.

Cass

Hi Cass

I think I know what steam cleaners you mean, they did look good, I thought maybe for my Mum. I don't scrub my floors often enough to justify one.

I keep getting interupted, poorly cat and teenager, so doesn't turn out that I am destined to have h2g2 time afterall. Be back later

*goes off to parent and be a vet nurse*

Peanut

Hi Peanut

Sorry to hear that the Peanut household has been afflicted.. Have you still escaped all these floods?

Yes. Generally Mrs Cass is rather pleased with her floor steam cleaners. We have also bought a small hand-one for the bathroom walls etc, but part of the effectiveness of the floor ones is that they all come with a detacheable flannel type cloth that wipes up the dirt loosened by the high-temperature and pressure of the steam, and it seems that wiping or sponging down the tiles and surfaces makes the most of the handy-size one.

By the way Mrs Cass's mood has been lightened. Did I mention that she lost/mislaid her car keys about six weeks ago? Phoning Peugot i found that the "cheap" option for a new key was c£150, so we have been making do with just mine ever since. This lunch-time, removing a bit more of the garden wilderness, she found them hidden under foliage on a path, and, in spite of all the torrents of rain, it still works fine. A bit of a relief because we have more car costs coming.

Over the week-end I started the process of getting our spare second car on the road. I see that the tax ran out in Sept 2009 and I probably did not re-insure it in July. I pumped up the one flat tyre and put an old battery charger on the battery for almost two days. This morning it started up second time and I was driving it off to the garage, when I thought that its MOT chances would be better for at least a surface wash. The windscreen will need replacing and my mechanic detected a bit of under-body rust (I heard it), but he remains very positive about the car, knowing it of old and how few miles we did in it each year. The whole idea is to give it to our son who has just passed his driving test and needs to start the whole process of getting his first Car Insurance. At 39 it should not be like a teenager, and we will also pay the Tax and Insurance to get him started.. Parenting you see goes on. Like dogs children are "not just for Christmas."

Cass

Cass

Hi Cass

I remember you saying about your car keys and how you had searched high and low. I'm impressed that they still work and better still lightened Mrs Cass's mood

Also your son, is going to use the car to get to gigs and perhaps some camping weekends away . A car is a great . I have great memories of the one my Mum gave me when Hiccup was a young one.

Hiccup has been very motivated today, which makes me happy. When i got home she was cleaning the kitchen already, has organised her lunch, done some painting and gardening.

Cat is very poorly, I know that they can look shocking when they have an infection then pick up really quickly after treatment but right now he looks a sorry cat and I am concerned for him.

Peanut

Hi Peanut

Good to read in your last post that Hiccup was being positive- your previous had suggested problems- and I hope that the cat is better today. Since she cleaned them Mrs Cass's keys will not work the remote control- but that is just usually a question of a new battery. She is shortly off to the dentist- has just come in from the garden- and intends to call in Halfords on the way back, our daughters suggestion, for I found that I do not have a screwdriver with the appropriate head.

Nice and sunny here today.. and I was able to treat myself last thing last night and first thing this morning with a video of Federer's sublime tennis yesterday afternoon.. Such artistry!

Cass

Hi Cass

Rummaging around in a memory, there may be a handy hint somewhere, don't put your key back together straight away. Let it 'dry' open somewhere for a while.

Just thought I'd pass that on while it was in my head

Peanut

Hi Peanut

Yes. Good thought.

I had advised Mrs. Cass to put it on a window sill to dry out-- result panic when she was about to leave for the dentist and did not know where her car key was. Then her whole dental and Halfords trip was a disaster. They sold her the screwdriver and battery and fitted it, but it did not work. But she had admitted, in her initial relief and finding it in the garden and still functioning- to having "cleaned it a bit with a sponge".

Opening it with the new screwdriver I could see clear traces of wet and wondered about the impact of wet on 'chips' and wiring, so [as you have suggested] it is now on the window sill in a dismantled state and visibly drying.

But I have also suggested that we swap keys in the event of her remote control function not returning. Manual locking and unlocking is no hardship- though I must say that, being an habitual "Did I lock the car?" person I have rather enjoyed being able to check from some distance without actually going all the way back. But I would not pay £170 just to get that back.

Cheers.. Thanks for thinking of us.

Cass

Afternoon Cass

Good luck with the key.
I don't like them myself and my Mum's car has a habit of just deciding to lock itself which always perturbs me
Feeling crook today so not doing much,yet, I hoping I'll perk up later

Peanut

Hi Peanut

I hope you are feeling better today... We are gradually getting sucked into Wimbledon- as ever.. Fortunately I can keep in touch with it on my allotment through Radio Five Live.. At 8pm it is about time I went there. Mrs Cass has picked some peas and I have some that I can pick to add to them, having waited a few days for the pods to swell..

But do you also find the recent weather not terribly conducive to "getting going"? We have had grey calmness and today real muggy warm air. But fortunately no flooding.

Cass

Hi Cass

I am feeling better than yesterday and hope to be fully recovered tomorrow. It was very warm and muggy here until a breeze picked up this afternoon. It has been a lovely evening.

Wimbledon at the allotment, sounds like you got life sussed there Cass.

I have been picking strawberries and a handful of mulberries today. Contemplating making rhubarb wine

Peanut