h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You may remember me mentioning an smug vegetarian of my acquaintance in a previous journal entry. Well, the other day I was discussing a particularly tasty chicken recipe and she said 'that would be good with shrimp'.

I paused.

'You eat shrimp,' I asked.

She said, 'yes'

I said, 'ew! shrimp aren't kosher'

she said 'why?'

I said 'they swim in the sea and have neither scales or fins. Read Leviticus.'


As many conversations with this person end, this one ended with her laughing in incomprehension.


Now, tell me.

She avoids eating mammals (and, apparently, birds), but apparently eats crustaceans with wild abandon and claims to qualify as a vegetarian.

I avoid crustaceans, and try to limit my consumption of mammals and birds. Can I call myself a vegetarian? Can I be smug like her?

(okay, I know I'm already smug.)

Neither of you are vegetarians.

And, for various reasons, mostly not related to diet, you are entitled to a degree of smugness

And my lemon cream shrimp and clam pasta sauce is to die for

Don't worry, she probably eats those tiny shrimp that are farmed in vast toxic pools in South East Asia. Such is the fate of smug people who don't know how to describe themselves.

I told the story to my (not smug) vegetarian neighbor and she commented that if you eat a plate of shrimp you take a dozen lives but if you eat a salmon you only take one life. And I added that if you eat a steak your sharing the responsibility of a single killing with dozens of other people.

Oh, Karma! I just quit eating processed meat because I saw the inside of a slaughterhouse and processing plant! When I can troll for cows I'll go back to beef.

Although, fish is becoming increasingly problematic as well ....

http://thetyee.ca/News/2009/01/13/EatingSalmon/

I had a lovely Thai sweet/hot chili tofu dish yesterday, though. And I'm well stocked up with faux meat too!

http://www.yvesveggie.ca/index.php/products/P18/

Not to mention some frozen bison burgers.

So what should I call myself?

'So what should I call myself? laugh'

a human?