h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I found this website that plays a Nickel Creek song called Spit on a Stranger, so if you have read my article and you want to know what they sound like, copy and paste this into your address bar:
http://www.iwelk.net/nickelcreek/spit.html

One of my partners in crime had his Bar Mitzvah yesterday. As for the ceremony, me being Catholic and all, I don't think that I've ever felt so lost in my entire life. I'm easy to spot at Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremonies: I'm the little nut-brown Catholic sitting alone on the bench reading the Torah left to right with nobody talking to me. :'(

But then there was the reception, about 5 hours later. The ceremony was an hour and a half long, and then Andrew's friends went home while Andrew went to have a reception with his family. At 5:00 all of Andrew's friends met at the Student Union at the local college for billiards and bowling, and hung out until around 9:00. When I got there, Marco leaped in front of the door and sort of spread his arms out in a "Ta da" pose. My dad turned to me and said, "Do you know anybody here?" Haha. No, even strangers act like goofballs when I'm around. I realized that night that contrary to popular belief I am a size 8 in bowling shoes, rather than a 9, which is cool because my mom is a size 8 and so I nnow KNOW that I can borrow shoes from her. ("Mirror, mirror, on the wall, are you my mother afterall?") But anyway, Erica (friend of mine) were on lane 6, while Marco and Logan were on lane 5, and so we shared the little ball return chute... thing. (If you know the technical term for that, by all means, TELL ME! ) Marco and Logan are OK bowlers, while Erica and aren't really very good at all. The photographer that Andrew's family hired stayed around lanes 5 & 6 for some time, and so after a group huddle, Logan, Marco, Erica and I decided to give the man a photoshoot he'd never soon forget. Marco bowled normally, but as the ball would veer towards the right of the alley, he's tilt his head at a 90° angle to the left, and use all of "The Force" to get a turkey. Logan didn't try as if his life depended on it to get a strike, but was proud of himself if the ball got even near the pins, and would leap 5 feet in the air for every pin he actually hit. Erica picked up her ball, sat down, put the ball between her knees, stood up, and then kicked it. I picked all of the really heavy balls and heaved them down the lane with all of my might. Sometimes I rolled the ball backwards. Sometimes I slipped and got a ground eye view of my ball diving miserably into the gutter. I personally think I put on the best show. Logan finally said, "You don't have to fall over EVERY time." and I responded, "Well, the photographer's standing right there; I can't just be BORING now, CAN I?!!" and Marco and Erica agreed.

Wheee... this went on until 8:45 when everyone went home.

I had fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun.

Rita