This is the Message Centre for serenity
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oh well.
serenity Started conversation Aug 25, 2004
today, i should have been celebrating my silver wedding anniversary.
but as i divorced the 13 years ago.......
oh well, it saves on organising and spending all that money on a party.
maybe i shall have a quiet drink later and think back on what a lucky escape i had
oh well.
Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. Posted Aug 25, 2004
hi helen
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you know my philosopy
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id,e rather single and happy, than married and misrable,lol jimxxx
oh well.
smurfles Posted Aug 25, 2004
congratulations on having the courage to admit when things weren't right for you helen.
Sometimes i hear people say it was easier to stay put,but they always seem <.enjoy the love.<hxx
oh well.
serenity Posted Aug 26, 2004
thanks for all of your kind words
sal..
hopefully, i will soon have the courage to get rid of this one too. its getting worse as each day passes and i cant find the right answer to sort it all out.
i keep getting loads of advice, but its all from people who havent got a clue as to what its like to live like this.
one day.........
oh well.
Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. Posted Aug 26, 2004
hi helen
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ive reached 56,on month+ off 57,and somehow avoided the marrage bit lol
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did get near in the 80,s,remember susan sal.
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once bitten twice shy.
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before i forget helen, will be hopefully joining the pc brigade on the 2nd sept,having to learn all over again,like with my links for h2 and tw.
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you know what they say as far as
where theres a will,theres a way,(its just finding the courage to say enogh,s,enough,goodluck jimbobxxxx
oh well.
serenity Posted Aug 26, 2004
thanks jim.
let me know as soon as you have everything set up and we can have a chat on instant messenger.
oh well.
Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. Posted Aug 26, 2004
hey helen,
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it will probably take me a month to work out the basics lol.
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whoever had the pc before me, as,from what i can workout,deleted the free games for some reason, or i could have played them till i get the inter link.
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im off to meet a few friends off the h2g2 from scotland tomorrow,they are in huddersfield for a week,so im going to see them.
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have to be up for 8-45 am, so my bed will be calling in about an hour,night,night,jimbobxxxx
oh well.
Paganmoon - Crazy as Ever Posted Aug 26, 2004
helen... i know it's hard to break free at times... it's not always as easy as packing your suitcase...
i was physically and mentally abused by my second husband, but as i had two kids to see to, i just couldn't walk out... we would have had nowhere to go, the kids needed a roof over their heads and food in their bellies... luckily they didn't know the half of what was going on...
one day i found the courage to stand up to him and told him i wasn't frightened of him anymore, i fought back both mentally and physically... i told him i was better than him, basically told him to get a life and pi$$ off...
he wouldn't leave, but neither would i... we lived seperate lives most of the time, but at least he'd stopped the bullying...
then it all went pear shaped... he sexually abused my daughter, (his step daughter).... that's the main point that he is my ex... but i blame myself partly, because if i had walked out sooner it wouldn't have happened....
so helen, you see i do understand in part what you are going through... i feel for you luv...
oh well.
serenity Posted Aug 27, 2004
sheryl
.
is a small minded, insecure, jealous, self obsessed, self opinionated, control freak.
all he is worried about is having a roof over his head and some mug to look after him, in the way he wants and he goes out of his way to get it.
i have been reduced to a 'nothing', with his constant tirade of negativity and discouraging criticisms.
.
the trouble is, you try and be kind to them and let them have what they want, all in the name of 'love' and they abuse it. ive given 150%+ and its still not enough.
.
we are constantly arguing these days as im trying to get across that i am my own person and should live my life for me, not him, which isnt very easy as you know.
.
he feels that he is under threat of me moving out and going to be with any man that i chat to online... i went through hell last year, as i was helping that friend who's wife was dying, all because he thought i was going to move to liverpool as soon as she was dead..
.
i could go on and on and fill up the whole of h2, but its my problem and i have to deal with it..
.
im brilliant at helping others sort their lives out and give help and advice,... i just cant sort me out
.
now where is that shining knight?????
.
.
oh well.
smurfles Posted Aug 27, 2004
hihelen,you don't need a shining knight love,just ome self confidence.If you are so unhappy surely you would be better off by yourself??It might be lonely,but you would at east have a life of your own,and the opportunity to make new friends,and go out when yu wanted.I can understand what sheryl is saying,and with children it is a lot harder to just up sticks and go for it,but there comes a point when enough is enough.
I hope thngs work out for you,and that before long you make the decision th
at you feel is right for you,whatever it is.xx
oh well.
Paganmoon - Crazy as Ever Posted Aug 27, 2004
helen..
my ex was the same trying to belittle eveything i did... he only clung to me for show, to say to the world "hey, look at me, i'm a big man with a wife and kids..", when in reality he was a complete waste of space.. he only stayed with me because no-one else would have him...
if i could do things that he couldn't he hated it... when i started to read the tarot a male reader came to the house to help me learn and help give me confidence to start up on my own... my ex accused me of having an affair with him, so i did have a brief fling.... na-na-na-na to him.... serves him right..
you will find the strength one day helen... i wish you luck....
oh well.
serenity Posted Aug 28, 2004
sheryl.
.
everything you are saying about your ex, is what im living today. are you sure it wasnt
.
you had a brief fling eh? you little hussey
the thing is, with all the accusations and so on, it makes you want to go and do what it is you are being accused of. why be blamed and not get the fun?.
.
its true what you say, they are little men who try to make themselves look big and bring you down to their level in the process. you wonder how they have managed to get away with it for so long..i blame the parents
.
oh well.
Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. Posted Aug 28, 2004
morning helen,sal,shel
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im totally shattered this morning.
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helen,when you feel you need to get away even for the day, do it.
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i went out at 9am yesterday,took a bus,then a long train trip to huddersfield,to meet a couplein the area ive known for years off the h2g2.
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i didnt get there till 11-15am,after a walk to a fishshop,(called tribell,s)they came about 11-35
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as there was nothing in the town to really do, we took a trp out to compland(copmpo,cleggy,foggy)last of the summer wine.and john took my photo infront of the cafe from the programme,
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im paying for it today, but i wouldnt have mised it for the world,jimbobxxxx
oh well.
Paganmoon - Crazy as Ever Posted Aug 28, 2004
helen...
my ex tried so hard to turn me into a ghost and take the sparkle from my eye... well it didn't work... he tried to make me feel ugly and believe that no-one else wanted me.... that made me determined to prove him wrong... helen i had a few brief affairs and one that lasted 5 years.... i know that doesn't say much of my morals, but none were seedy affairs and i have no regrets... i felt good in knowing that he was the loser not me, and also knowing that he didn't know everything, coz he knew nowt of wot i was up to....
now i'm settled with paul and have never even considered seeing anyone else.... oh i know i joke about the hawkins brothers, but that's just for a laugh... i'd run a bloody mile if they turned up on me doorstep...
keep the faith luv... i know you'll pull thru'...
.
.
.
.hiya jimbob...
good to hear that you had a successfull day out at your meet... seen last of the summer wine on telly and it looks a lovely part of the country to be in.... hope you were wearing your wellies for the photo....
oh well.
Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. Posted Aug 29, 2004
hi shel,helen
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i wanted to have wellies, there was a shop next door that sold them, so i asked if i could borrow a pair to take the photo,
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it was a young lass, and she said her mum wouldnt be happy,so sorry no wellies,lol
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im counting the days to going on my pc,only four to go,soon be thursday.
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it will be strange to see h2g2,all the time in full coclor, and the pics and smileys,but i keep getting the nagging feeling that something wont be right,maybe just the waiting getting me down.
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well last day of the olimpics, ive seen a few days here and there,we have a good tallt of medals for once,and its the f1 race today, so all in all should be a good day,for sunday,
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later,alligators,jimbobxxxx
oh well.
serenity Posted Aug 30, 2004
mornin all.
.
sal.
im trying to get my confidence back, im even going for little walks, which is something i havent done for a while. the trouble is, i get out and then want to get straight back in again .
i do spend a fair bit of time on my own as it is, with the hours he works, so having him move out wouldnt be any hardship.
.
jim.
its great being on the pc.. sometimes when im lurking, i see a thread that that has outside links and i can go straight to them. it does spoil you a bit and then when you go back to the digibox, you realise how restricteicted you are.
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but its great to chat 1 to 1 with people. i love it
.
sheryl.
i know exactly what you are saying about flings.... ive discovered another site, on the pc and i am making new friends. this site has people on it who live really close to me and ive met some.
some have become really close friends and others.... well, its a good job that they have invented black bin bags
.
and i dont have one ounce of guilt whatsoever.
all i know is that im having fun, for the first time in a long time. maybe one of them will eventually be my shining knight
.
oh well.
Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. Posted Aug 30, 2004
morning one and all
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bank hol monday, the weathers still windy and cold, so it looks like im stuck in all day,
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if it clears up a bit i,ll take the fence apart,then tomorrow reassemble two metres to the left.but by the look of the clouds,i dont think i,ll get the chance.
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i was thinking of a trip to town, but thers nothing open worth the trip,
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helen,
do what i did, just get on a bus,and head for somewhere out of the area,dont plan, do what you want to do,come back when you want,ive even got on a cicular bus near me, and gone round the houses, and back to the stop i got on at.
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sal will know the city circular i used.
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think back to something,or somewhere you have been,or done,and go back in time,for yourself.
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once you break the routine,helen,your confidence will return,it like they say(if you fall of a horse,get back on straight away)what you have to keep saying to yourself, is thatis not your boss, you are your own boss,
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so get up one morning,go to your main bus or train station, (dont pick a transport)just get on any long journey ride,if its a coach,thats better,dont think, just do.jimbobxxxxx
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ps sal knows that years ago,till the cb came along, i used to hide in the shadows,go to work,come home, then sit listening to the radio(we had no tv)then bed,cb brought me out and about in the 1980,s.i even had a cb club for two years.
oh well.
serenity Posted Aug 31, 2004
hi jim.
i suppose i do tend to rely on the pc for chatting too much.
but at least they are nice to me
well most of the time
ive been cut off for so long, that i dont know what is going on in my own little cul de sac.
its partially through choice. ive had so many nasty neighbours in the past, that i dont want to get involved with anymore.
i do get out once a month and go to shrewsbury and do the shops.. i dont buy much, but its nice to see different shops.
i am a charity shopholic
Key: Complain about this post
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oh well.
- 1: serenity (Aug 25, 2004)
- 2: Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. (Aug 25, 2004)
- 3: Paganmoon - Crazy as Ever (Aug 25, 2004)
- 4: smurfles (Aug 25, 2004)
- 5: serenity (Aug 26, 2004)
- 6: Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. (Aug 26, 2004)
- 7: serenity (Aug 26, 2004)
- 8: Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. (Aug 26, 2004)
- 9: Paganmoon - Crazy as Ever (Aug 26, 2004)
- 10: serenity (Aug 27, 2004)
- 11: smurfles (Aug 27, 2004)
- 12: Paganmoon - Crazy as Ever (Aug 27, 2004)
- 13: serenity (Aug 28, 2004)
- 14: Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. (Aug 28, 2004)
- 15: serenity (Aug 28, 2004)
- 16: Paganmoon - Crazy as Ever (Aug 28, 2004)
- 17: Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. (Aug 29, 2004)
- 18: serenity (Aug 30, 2004)
- 19: Jimcracker7[magiclink.rip gone altogether. im back.in my home from home. (Aug 30, 2004)
- 20: serenity (Aug 31, 2004)
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