h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've decided that Monday's are just too depressing, so I've decided to rename the days. Now, I know that there's an underground movement out there to rename Thursday "Thing", but for me, that just doesn't work. I mean "Thing" already has so many meanings, that you're just clouding the issue by making it a day as well. Already, when I'm asking for something, it's "Can I have the thingy thing? You know, the thingo". If Thing were also Thursday, I might have to actually remember the word "pencil" from time to time. Besides which, it'd just be one more thing to remember (no pun intended).

So anyway, I've decided to take the Mathematical approach to naming the days, and reduce the number of days to 3 while I'm at it. The week now goes: Friday minus 4, Friday minus 3, Friday - 2, Friday - 1, Friday, Saturday, Sunday (I suppose I should give credit to the space program for the idea...T-10, T-9, etc.) It gives a whole new outlook to the week - no longer do you have to put up with "Monday", because you're already looking forward to the next weekend when it gets to "Friday-4". And it's not something you have to think about, because subconsciously, everyone's counting down to Friday anyway.