The Vice's Advice
Created | Updated Mar 9, 2006
A Pithy Interlude
First off, I apologize to my loyal fan(s?) for missing last month's column ... I had a pressing speaking engagement at Ovine Expo '06. Secondly, it's my birthday in a couple of Thursdays. Most people, upon hearing this news, tend to jump right out of their seats and run off to the nearest mall to purchase me expensive gifts. However, this birthday, I can only ask one thing of those people...
That is, your most vigorous exertions in keeping h2g2 as h2g2. No elaborate scheme is required to make this happen, just individual effort. It baffles me when people grouse about h2g2's fate, the quality of guide entries and conversations, and don't make any effort to improve their output. All I want for my birthday is the assurance of h2g2's uniqueness. And also, a pony.
I'd also like to bid farewell to Paully, whose two-week assignment here has ended after about two years. Vincent (my nickname for him ... which unfortunately never caught on as well as some others did. Jimster is affectionately known as 'Toby' in my head, though when I find myself at odds with him, it's not always affectionate) served hootoo well, and he will be missed. He will miss out on some efforts by the office of the Vice President to spruce up the Italics by outfitting them with powdered wigs. It was a central campaign promise, and as Vice President I intend to see it through (it may be held off on until after reelection time though so I don't have to give up such a potent campaign issue). The Office of the Vice President humbly submits to the Powers Behind the Towers that one of the criteria for replacing Vincent ought to be that the applicant should have a suitable complexion to complement a nice big powdered wig.
And lastly, I'd like to pay tribute to the 11 new smilies that now adorn our conversation forums — from the inexplicable 
to, no doubt President Hypatia's favorite, 
. By the way, what letter is being written here: 
? A fancy 'M'? And what is 'Biro', anyway? Hopefully, Vincent and Toby will release a clarification to my office and I'll publish it in our next edition, because on The Vice's Advice, we report ... you decide.
The h2g2 Presidential Election 2005 Archive
