All this talk of Wales brings a melancholic tear to my eye as I still harbour fond memories of a youthful sojourn to the principality with my partner, Old Spice.

We had no transport but had been told that if we wanted to buy a car, we'd be wisest to tread eagerly to Carmart than to peruse the small-ads.

"What do you want and where are you headed?" we were asked.

"We'd like to have a Ford. West." replied I.

As it was, we had porthcawl to spend and had to settle for a moldy old bangor, which was only worth about eighty quid, but cost us a hundred and ten because we were in no place to haggle. We also bought a map to get clwyd up on the route.

"It's a nice little runner, she's a bute!", he'd said as we drove out of the garage, but clearly 'e lied, as later on that day, as we crossed the Cambrians, something went wrong. Not being mechanically minded, we didn't know if the pem broke or the dyff'd gone ... either way we were stranded. Without sullying our clothes, we pretended to try to diagnose the problem as only the uninitiated can.

"Maybe it's sprung a leek ... press that in ... is the Brecon?" I asked earnestly.

"Beacon's flashing", affirmatively responded Old Spice who was observing the hazard indicator on the dashboard.

Then it snowed on usk. Even though I considered myself a man of flint in those days, I nevertheless put on my cardigan, my red-top wllhelis and my fishguard. It seemed like we were up there for days. Neither of us 'ad a wrist-watch.

"Still Marches n't it?" chuckled the Mrs., wondering if the months were passing too.

Fortunately, eventually, a kindly soul found us, llay down, looked underneath and told us without Merthyr merriment that we may as well send it "... to where they wrecks 'em".

"Holy Head, why?" I exclaimed, taking a deep sharp breath in.

"Cym, look at the engine angle, see?" he said not without a touch of the mumbles. "It wasn't built well so now it's collapsed".

Then he gave us a lift to the station so we could catch the train home, which was rhyl nice, so having went out of his way for us, we promised to send him a post Cardiff we got home safely. Which we did.