weeds
Created | Updated Apr 12, 2003
Weeds would have to be the single greatest argument against the concept of so-called 'recreational' gardening. What's recreational about watching the plants that you have tenderly raised from seedlings, watered, fertilised, and sung to sleep at night (well maybe not quite, but you know what I mean) wither and die a horrible brownish shrivelled death, while the weeds you have ripped out, poured sulphuric acid over, yelled abuse at, and set the dog on, flourish and prosper. The little smug green b*****ds. Stick to plastic plants, concrete and green paint, that's my advice. Only make sure there are no cracks in the concrete, otherwise you know what will grow there. And keep a flamethrower handy just in case.
