The Building - Chapter 24: Beachcombing

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Chapter 24: Beachcombing

Ori could hear splashing all the way down the hall. It was a cheerful sort of noise, so Ori followed it.

Ori's guests had discovered the swimming pool.

So that's why it's there, thought Ori.

Why not? replied Prajapati. Not everything is on a 'must-haves-only' basis, you know.

Ori found that thought comforting.

A swimming pool

'Hey, Ori!' called Habik. 'Come take a bird bath! Or put those wings away and swim with us!' The second suggestion sounded good, so that's what Ori did. As they sat around drying off, Zena had questions.

'Where are we, really?'

Sigh. 'I don't know that 'where' makes much sense as a question, any more than 'when' would. I think of it as the Paternoster Annex. It's sort of a traveling inn or hostelry for us while we're going between places.'

Agad nodded, a bit uncertainly. 'And where are we going?'

Ori shrugged. 'I'm not exactly sure. I need to go and consult with the, er, navigator. You all can get dressed and get some breakfast in the dining room while I find out.'

Back in the costume room, Ori had questions, too. 'What kind of clothes do we need?'

Same as usual will be fine.

'So still in Mesopotamia?'

Yes. We wouldn't want to uproot your friends too much. They'll like it where they're going, trust me.

'I always do,' said Ori cheerfully, although secretly hoping this particular section of Mesopotamia wasn't likely to go boom anytime soon.

There will be some travel involved, said Prajapati, so pack food and sleeping rolls and something to make fire with. There's a Zippo lighter in the pocket of that zoot suit on the hanger.

'Don't I need a map?'

I'm arranging a guide for you, chuckled Prajapati in a way that made Ori slightly suspicious. Ori went to join the others at breakfast – pancakes, naturally – and explained what they were going to do. The others were up for this: so far, this had been the best adventure of their lives.

********

The travellers stepped out of the Paternoster, rather heavily burdened with improvised backpacks and such, and looked around. As usual, the sky was blue, the air hot and dry, and the ground underneath sandy and too hot for bare feet. Ah, but here was something new: the sand filled only half of the 360° of their visual horizon: the rest was taken up by blue water.

'A lake!' said Zena in delight. 'I've heard of those!'

Ori walked over and scooped up some of the water, tasted it. 'The Mediterranean, I believe. It's…sort of a very big lake, Zena. It's called a sea. Don't worry, it won't hurt you. Just don't drink the water. It will only make you thirstier. But you can swim in it.'

To Agad, Habik, and the other children, 'swim' was the magic word. In less time than it would have taken Ori to fly to the nearest sand dunes, backpacks, equipment, and clothes were shed on the beach and kids were frolicking in the water.

Ori laughed. Agad and Habik's mother Urda said, 'You have to excuse them. They haven't had this much fun in a very long time.'

Ori gave Urda a hug. 'Or you, either, I suspect.' Ori looked at all the grownups. 'Stop being grownups, you people! That's an order! Go swim in the Mediterranean! Whatever we have to do next can wait!'

And they did. And it did. Because at least once in everyone's life, they need to swim in the Mediterranean.

*******

A glorious day and a huge collection of seashells later, Ori's travelling party was building a fire as the sun set. Zena looked up from combing her hair and shouted, 'Look! There's a man swimming our way!' Ori thought this was odd because nobody had seen any boats.

Jonah, pensive, in the water, with the whale behind.

Go and help him, said Prajapati. But take what he says with a grain of salt.

'Who is he?' whispered Ori.

The guide I promised you.

Ori followed the others, who were busy helping the man out of the sea. As Ori watched, a rather large water mammal reared its head from the water and called out, in a language only Ori could understand, 'There! You're back on land! Stay there, please! What a terrible stomachache!'

Ori's party brought the shivering, naked man to where they were building the fire. Someone produced a towel from the luggage, and one of the men found a robe that would fit the stranger. Realising that it was going to cool down pretty fast now that the sun was setting, Ori lit the fire using the Zippo lighter. The others, used to wonders by now, paid no attention – but the stranger jumped up in agitation. He stared at Ori.

'Have I escaped from sea monsters only to be taken by sorcerers?' he exclaimed, and then fell on the sand, sobbing and elaborately bowing toward the setting sun while babbling incoherently a strange set of nonsense syllables interspersed with things like 'Oh God, forgive me!' and 'I promise I won't do it again!'

What in creation is wrong with him? asked Ori privately. Is he that addled by being accidentally swallowed by that whale? It seems to me the whale suffered more than he did.

It's a long story, said Prajapati. At least, it will be when he tells it. Show him your wings, that should stop the 'sorcerer' nonsense. Feed him and let him talk. But believe about half of what he says. He's…quite a character. His name's Jonah, by the way.

'Hey, Jonah,' said Ori, unfurling a full set of angel wings. 'We need to talk.'

The feathered display let loose another torrent of religious gibberish – this time directed at Ori. There was laughter and eyerolling from the expeditionary team. Finding out that Jonah was too nervous to let Zena (or any woman) touch him, Agad and Habik settled the traveller by the fire, gave him some fresh water to drink, and sat down on either side of him, speaking soothingly. Eventually, he calmed down enough to tell his tale while the others prepared a supper of sauce, salad, roasted vegetables, and freshly-made pita.

'You're probably the first human to travel by cetacean submarine,' commented Ori. 'Was that your intention?'

Jonah stared at Ori blankly.

'Were you trying to become famous by riding inside a whale?' Habik translated helpfully.

Jonah shook his head impatiently. 'No! It all started like this: The word of the LORD came to me, Jonah, son of Amittai, saying�'

Ori sighed. 'Were you ever, perchance, a scribe in one of the cities of Shinar?' If so, this is going to be a VERY long tale.

'Me, a scribe from one of those godless cities? Never! I am a prophet of the one true god.'

Ori sighed an even deeper sigh. 'I would hardly describe the cities of Shinar as 'godless'. In all fairness, they have more gods than you can shake a sistrum at.'

Jonah glared. 'But none of those gods are the true god.'

'The one who made everything?' Jonah nodded. 'And he's the one you're a prophet for?'

'Yes!' (from Jonah) and Not really! from Prajapati, simultaneously.

I keep trying to talk to him, Prajapati said, but he doesn't listen very well. To be precise: he listens until he hears a word he knows. Then he goes off on a tangent of his own.

Does this explain how he ended up giving a whale a bellyache? asked Ori.

Sort of. Let him tell it. But sit down: it's quite a story.

So Ori perched on a driftwood log, wings folded, while supper was prepared and Jonah began his tale.

And the word of the LORD came to me, Jonah, son of Amittai, saying, 'Arise, go to Nineveh, that great city, and cry against it: for their wickedness is come up before me.

Not quite, glossed Prajapati. I told him I needed to talk to them. They need to make a few adjustments after the Tower of Babel business. He put his own spin on it, as usual.

But I rose up to flee unto Tarshish from the presence of the Lord, and went down to Joppa; and I found a ship going to Tarshish: so I paid the fare thereof, and went down into it, to go with them unto Tarshish from the presence of the LORD.

'You did what?' said all the kids together. 'That was really stupid,' added Habik bluntly.

Jonah shrugged. 'I didn't want to go to Nineveh,' he admitted simply.

That guy is as stubborn as a whole mule train, said Prajapati. The only guy in Canaan who can hear me, and he turns out to be a self-referential duckweed.

Duckweed?

Yeah. He blocks the light and clogs up the surface.

Jonah continued his tale.

But the LORD sent out a great wind into the sea, and there was a mighty tempest in the sea, so that the ship was like to be broken.

That's right, blame it on me.

Then the mariners were afraid, and cried every man unto his god, and cast forth the wares that were in the ship into the sea, to lighten it of them. But I was gone down into the sides of the ship; and I lay, and was fast asleep.

'Agad sleeps like that,' said Habik. 'He slept through an earthquake once.'

'It was just a little earthquake,' protested Agad. There was a brief intermission while food was passed out. Jonah loudly thanked The LORD for the food. Everybody else thanked Ori. Ori thanked Prajapati. Prajapati said, You're welcome. Try Urda's tzatziki, it's the best ever. And see if you can get that idiot to tell you the rest of it before midnight.

'You were asleep during a seastorm,' prompted Ori.

So the shipmaster came to me, and said unto me, What meanest thou, O sleeper? arise, call upon thy God, if so be that God will think upon us, that we perish not.

And they said every one to his fellow, Come, and let us cast lots, that we may know for whose cause this evil is upon us. So they cast lots, and the lot fell upon me.

'Somehow, I'm not surprised,' said Zena, 'although that wasn't exactly the scientific method in action.' Ori jumped when Prajapati let out a loud guffaw.

'Go on,' Ori said grimly.

Then said they unto me, Tell us, we pray thee, for whose cause this evil is upon us; What is thine occupation? and whence comest thou? what is thy country? and of what people art thou?

Ori groaned. This was going to take all night.

And I said unto them, I am�

'Jonah!' shouted Agad. 'You told them your name was Jonah, and you were running from the god who told you to do something, but you were too mean to go and do it – because it might possibly help somebody, anybody, who wasn't one of your tribe, or your family, or your wrestling fan club, or whatever. And yadda yadda, the god you decided to tick off happened to be the creator of the whole universe, who maybe, just maybe, likes everybody and not just the members of your fan club, and who was determined enough to get you to do the job that he SENT A WHOLE STORM and inconvenienced a whole lot of sailors just to get your attention! IS THAT WHAT YOU WERE GOIING TO SAY?'

There was a collective holding of breaths. Everybody looked at Jonah. Ori almost dropped a piece of pita with tzatziki. That would have been a shame. It was really very good tzatziki.

'Yes,' said Jonah in a very, very tiny voice.

Everyone breathed again.

'Xenophobia is a phenomenon with which everyone here is only too well acquainted,' said Zena archly. 'Now you will tell us that the sailors threw you overboard.'

'Er, yes, they did,' said Jonah, surprised. 'How did you guess?'

Habik and several other children laughed.

'Because that's what I would have done if I'd been captain of the ship,' Zena replied. 'To save the others. And then�'

'I know!' guessed a small boy whose name really was Mushen. 'And then you were about to drown…and�'

'…and?' encouraged Ori, who was glad the little ones were getting over the trauma of Akkad.

'…and then the whale showed up and SWALLOWED YOU!' crowed Mushen.

'Gave him a ride, you mean!' corrected Agad.

'That was nice of the whale,' said a small girl named Erish. Everyone laughed.

'You owe that whale about a ton of sardines and an antacid tablet, a big one,' added Habik.

When they'd all settled down, Jonah finally admitted what the group had guessed: yes, the whale had brought the reluctant prophet back almost to his starting point. No, he still didn't want to go to Nineveh, but yes, he'd go because he was afraid that if he didn't, something even worse would happen to him.

Good, said Prajapati. I really didn't want to resurrect that terror bird.

Ori stepped in, because the kids needed their shuteye. 'So you know how to get to Nineveh, is what you're saying?'

Jonah nodded.

'Good,' said Ori. 'Because that's where we're going. You can lead the way. Tomorrow. But tonight, we're going to have a very nice sleep here under the stars.'

And they did. Zena played and sang them all to sleep with a lullaby, while Ori went on a postprandial patrol flight.

No terror birds. Just an owl hooting in the darkness. And bright stars above. Soon even the overwrought Jonah was fast asleep.

A prophet, a campfire, and the tail of a whale.
Post Novella Project 2022/2023 Archive

Dmitri Gheorgheni

01.05.23 Front Page

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