h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The TARDIS spun steadily through the eddies and temporal winds of the time-space vortex. In the console room the Doctor was rested in an armchair whilst Peri was off exploring the TARDIS with strict instructions not to get lost.
Suddenly the TARDIS rocked and the cloister bell began to ring out loudly,
"What's that noise?" asked Peri, entering the console room and being thrown to the floor straight away as the room rocked again.
"We've been struck by something inside the vortex" the Doctor explained as his fingers raced across the dials, buttons and switches on the hexagonal console, "I'm going to have to try and bring us down in an emergency landing!" he had to shout to make himself heard over the din of the struggling engines.
Soon however the screeching roar gave way to the gentle grating of the TARDIS materializing.
"Shall we take a look outside then?" the Doctor offered cheerfully and opened the doors.
The Doctor stepped out of the blue box, followed by Peri,
"Doctor" the American student began, "Why are we in the middle of a cricket pitch?"
The Doctor was looking around him in amazement, "Well I never, we've arrived in a favourite little retreat of mine."
"Oh yeah? Where's that?"
"Stockbridge"
"So what do we do here?" Peri asked the Doctor,
"Well I was rather thinking that I might enjoy a nice game of cricket,"
"Oh great" Peri sighed, "Well you go and play your cricket and I'll take a look around"
"Right you are" the Doctor grinned, "I'll just go and get my cricket bat I think"
Ten minutes later Peri had found her way into a small shop on the edge of the village green.
"Wonder whether or not they sell clothes here" she whispered to herself,
"I wouldn't count on it" laughed a cheery male voice over her shoulder. It belonged to a teenage boy in a loose T-shirt and jeans, "Sorry, didn't introduce myself, my name's David Williams."
"Peri" said Peri.

* * * * *

Rasputaltron sat in his office much happier than he had been earlier, his display rack had arrived and the Black Guardian was closing in on the fifth Doctor and a very cunning disguise, although Rasputaltron didn't see why. Romana sat in a high backed gold chair opposite him a little more easy than when she had arrived now that she knew that she wasn't going to be killed. In fact her captor wasn't really that bad.
"Soon the black Guardian will trap the fifth Doctor, have you met him? oh charming bloke!" Rasputaltron smiled from behind his desk.
Romana shook her head. "Why do you need all of the Doctor anyway?" she asked.
"Well I'm glad you asked!" he said. then he stopped as he realised he couldn't really explain.
"You don't know do you?" Romana giggled at him.
"Well according to my scientists a time lords," he indicated towards Romana. "Or Ladies, regenerations can be used to create a source of unimaginable power because of the power they receive from the eye of harmony, and so I am going to create a new galaxy and enslave this one!" He finally explained.
"Very clever." Romana said.
Rasputaltron smiled and nodded.

* * * * *

The Black Guardian's plan was coming together in the most spectacular fashion. His Time Wraith had already captured the Doctor's companion in the shop and now all he had to do was get the Doctor.
He advanced across the village green, headed straight for the Doctor who was currently bowling against the vicar.
"Doctor!" he yelled,
"Hello" the Doctor smiled, "I'm sorry, can I help you?"
The Black Guardian cursed as he realised that he was still in his disguise. With a rippling of reality his physical form twisted and moved through several shades of eternity before settling into his usual evil persona.
"Oh" was all the Doctor had time to utter before another shard fell to the ground.