HOLDEN Vs FORD
Created | Updated Nov 5, 2002
In the suburban streets, only the sound of wind that has had too much to drink of whatever wind usually has too much to drink of can be heard. Assorted pedestrians fall silent as a HOLDEN and a FORD growl up to the traffic lights, the HOLDEN driver gazes down at his NOS system, opens the bottles and checks his BOOST gage, this is going to be a good RUN. The FORD Driver also gazes down at his NOS and BOOST gage. It's hard to tell which car does it first but the two cars start to growl at each other like well trained police dogs attempting to back each other down. Their bodies rippling with power, their Chassis straining under the torque. The Holden driver relaxes his seat back a notch, places one hand on the top of his wheel, the other on the Shifter, his girl relaxes from the edge of her seat and decides that it would be much safer if she dug gouges out of the Drivers arm which her nails by gripping his bicep as hard as she can. The HOLDEN Commodore ripples a bit longer this time and gurgles out kind of noise you don't tell your mother about. The Falcon Driver spins his Cap so It's facing backwards, sticks his Gum on the Dash and flicks his Boost gage till the loose cable clicks into place and starts doing what it is that loose cables do when there not loose anymore. This all lasts about 20 seconds.
The orange light pointing the opposing direction on the intersection flashes, muscles tense up the necks of both drivers, a drip sweat runs down each back leaving a ice cold area for the drunken wind to rub against and give the drivers goose bumps.
A few barina's a meteor and assorted SUV's and 4 wheel drives drop their archors and glide to a halt at the lights, their eyes fixed on the static energy you can feel building up around to other two cars.
three things then proceed to happen in a matter of 9 or 10 seconds
Someone loses conciousness, someone wins, someone loses, and one of them gets a nasty wound on his bicep.
Both dogs suddenly loose their placid training and open their mouths wide exposing their fangs and letting rip a sound that even the drunken wind has to pay attention too.
the light turns green
both drivers eyes flick at each other then back to the road and squint like their in an old western film
a pedestrian faints
two clutches drop simultaniously, two chassis twist under the strain, two engines roar like demons getting a bikini wax and four tires battle with assorted chucks of gravel and rubber trying to get a grip against the road.
The rest is blur of Smoke, metal, loud noise and general chaos.
It doesn't matter who wins or loses, both cars put in a good fight and will continue to do so every morning when their drivers (Who are neighbours) leave for work.
This exact scene takes place at almost every set of lights about 40 times a day across the whole of Australia. Why?
Because we can.
Theres no real difference between Holden and Ford, but both are followed like Cults, if it was two Holdens or two Fords that pulled up at the lights, they would have cruized placidly off to play with some other traffic. There really is no reason other than "It sounded good at the time" to follow either side, but once your choice is made, there is no going back
wierd, I hope I have shed some light on why aussies regularly get into battles over holdens and fords (Holdens are GM cars. ie Opel in europe and chevrolet in america) just to put it more in perspective
by the way I'M HOLDEN ALL THE WAY!!!!! because FORDS LICK BALLS!!!!
...Had to say it, sorry, I'll be good.
The orange light pointing the opposing direction on the intersection flashes, muscles tense up the necks of both drivers, a drip sweat runs down each back leaving a ice cold area for the drunken wind to rub against and give the drivers goose bumps.
A few barina's a meteor and assorted SUV's and 4 wheel drives drop their archors and glide to a halt at the lights, their eyes fixed on the static energy you can feel building up around to other two cars.
three things then proceed to happen in a matter of 9 or 10 seconds
Someone loses conciousness, someone wins, someone loses, and one of them gets a nasty wound on his bicep.
Both dogs suddenly loose their placid training and open their mouths wide exposing their fangs and letting rip a sound that even the drunken wind has to pay attention too.
the light turns green
both drivers eyes flick at each other then back to the road and squint like their in an old western film
a pedestrian faints
two clutches drop simultaniously, two chassis twist under the strain, two engines roar like demons getting a bikini wax and four tires battle with assorted chucks of gravel and rubber trying to get a grip against the road.
The rest is blur of Smoke, metal, loud noise and general chaos.
It doesn't matter who wins or loses, both cars put in a good fight and will continue to do so every morning when their drivers (Who are neighbours) leave for work.
This exact scene takes place at almost every set of lights about 40 times a day across the whole of Australia. Why?
Because we can.
Theres no real difference between Holden and Ford, but both are followed like Cults, if it was two Holdens or two Fords that pulled up at the lights, they would have cruized placidly off to play with some other traffic. There really is no reason other than "It sounded good at the time" to follow either side, but once your choice is made, there is no going back
wierd, I hope I have shed some light on why aussies regularly get into battles over holdens and fords (Holdens are GM cars. ie Opel in europe and chevrolet in america) just to put it more in perspective
by the way I'M HOLDEN ALL THE WAY!!!!! because FORDS LICK BALLS!!!!
...Had to say it, sorry, I'll be good.
