h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: John Updike - a Character Study - A80779512
Author: Jordan - U201497

I couldn't let h2g2 as I've known it go without a short entry on the man who is probably my favorite writer. "Rabbit at Rest" is, I think, my favorite novel.

As I found that I've already written over 800 Microsoft Word pages in the Edited Guide (F113808?thread=8033828) I thought it would be best to keep this one short. Also, I don't know if I have time for one of my exhaustive, conventional biographies.

And go easy - this is my first PR offering in about a year and a half.

Don't apologise either for writing a lot or keeping this brief! You've been concise and critical without being derogatory, which makes it very readable.

Some suggestions:

"Having once been famously been described" - too many beens


the sex life, death, self-absorption and the simple, small town existence
-->
the sex life, death, self-absorption and simple, small town existence

"The Pennsylvania of his birth especially influence the environments" - influences or influenced?


The life of Angstrom, a former high school basketball star, and known by his nickname ‘Rabbit’, is chronicled in the Rabbit book series
-->
The life of Angstrom, a former high school basketball star known by his nickname ‘Rabbit’, is chronicled in the Rabbit book series


with both character and author nearing a half-century in age.
-->
with both character and author nearing their half-century.


to entertain, amuse and arouse, today.
-->
to entertain, amuse and arouse to this day.

Alex

Thanks Alex. I agree with all of your suggestions, and have accordingly changed the entry. And lesson learned - if you proofread an entry at 2 in the morning, it doesn't matter how concise you are, there are going to be problems.

Not to worry, that's what pedants are for.

Echoing what Tufty has already said, this is a worthwhile entry

I have just a couple of observations:

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This sentence (at the end of the second paragraph) can be removed as the content is restated in the following paragraph.

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pages after pages --> page after page

Good effort

h5ringer - Scout

Edited

Lanzababy

This is a good entry, Jodan.

I&#39;ve only two comments to make.

This section is rather clumsy, in my opinion:

"Updike was a middle class, white Anglo-Saxon Protestant male, and so most of his central characters are as well. An example of Updike’s autobiographical tendencies can be seen in his best known character, Harry Angstrom. The life of Angstrom, a former high school basketball star known by his nickname ‘Rabbit’, is chronicled in the Rabbit book series. Angstrom first appeared in print in the 1960 novel Rabbit, Run, as a 26-year-old middle class, Protestant male; when the book was published, Updike himself was a 28-year-old middle class, Protestant male."

The repetition of "middle-class Protestant male" three times in four sentences is jarring.

You shouldn&#39;t quote an entire poem at the end of the Entry, as this is a breach of copyright. About four lines is normally acceptable.

It&#39;s a really good entry.

Updike is one of my favourite authors too and I think you captured a large part of his appeal to the reader. It also made me want to go back and read the Rabbit series again which is probably the highest praise I can offer.

Yes, Gnomon, that repetition is in fact intentional. Jarring can be good.

Thanks Paul

I disagree. It makes an otherwise well-written entry seem poorly written at that point.

Your disagreement is just something that I will have to live with.

Hello guys. Can we just check where we're up to on this one - and remind everyone to keep their comments civil. This is a great Entry. It's only really lacking subheaders and links, that can be added during subbing of course. Jordan - is that something you'd like to tackle.

Our only suggestion at this point is to add something to the first couple of paragraphs that explains what the Entry is looking at, something about seeing how Updike's own character and concerns are reflected in his creations, and vice versa. We only say that because the title is quite ambigious. Is it about Updike's characters or the man himeself? (When it seems it is actually about both.) No need to change the title, as it quite cleverly sums that up, but a bit of clarification would help readers to get a handle earlier on what it's about.

But it's a great read. It would be nice to see this accepted for Approval and on its way.

To be honest, I forgot this was in here...

I don't think subheaders are necessary, but I'll add links.

I'm not sure about your suggestion about introducing the entry's intention earlier... I'll see if I can add a little something at the beginning without disrupting it, but if I can't find a way to do that, I won't.

Thanks for the suggestions.

Hi Jordan. Okay great. We'll wait to see what you come up with. Cheers

Nudge nudge

Yeah, I'm happy with it. I also think that the opening is fine. If the Eds think that it's unacceptable as is, I'm happy to remove it

We'll accept this as it stands, and take a look while it's going through editing. Well done

Your Guide Entry has just been picked from Peer Review by one of our Scouts, and is now heading off into the Editorial Process, which ends with publication in the Edited Guide. We've therefore moved this Review Conversation out of Peer Review and to the entry itself.

If you'd like to know what happens now, check out the page on 'What Happens after your Entry has been Recommended?' at EditedGuide-Process. We hope this explains everything.

Thanks for contributing to the Edited Guide!

thank you Eds! I am glad to see this selected!