You can tell a great deal about someone from their shoelaces. On a trivial level, for example, outdoor types often have little tiny bits of mud in their laces even after they've been cleaned...

This and other more perceptive observations have given rise to a new science, calling itself Ropology which aims to determine the relationship between the personality of the owner and the state of his shoelaces.

Though frowned upon by the mainstream scientific establishment, ropologists have followed the example of graphologists in publicising their potential to vet potential recruits for picky employers. Unknown to the interviewee, many companies now employ a trained ropologist to hide underneath the desk at interviews and take photographs and physical samples of the applicants laces, which are then meticulously analysed to determine whether his personality profile is suitable, and when he last stepped in dog s**t.