The Secret Life Of Smileys

There is a theory.

The theory states that not all smileys are known, that there are still some wild smileys in existence.

The Powers That Be would like us to think otherwise. They would like us to think that they created the smileys, and so the only smileys that exist are the smileys that they tell us about.

This is untrue. The smileys found here have in fact been bred from a few original smileys that were captured and domesticated a very long time ago. Ever wonder why so many of the smileys are that same yellow colour? The yellow gene was very prominent in that first group of wild smileys. Ever wonder why there are so many good ideas for new smileys that never get added? It's because they cannot do it, the resources are not there. Researchers have been using 'towel' as a smiley almost since the dawn of time. If it were possible for a towel smiley to be created, it would already have been done.

Wild smileys are different to domesticated smileys in many ways:

They are larger

There is a wider range of colours

They convey their meaning in a superior way

They cannot be misunderstood

They show up spectacularly in both Goo and Alabaster

And they are, to put it simply, better.

However, wild smileys are elusive, and rare. They retreated at the time of the first capture and few have been seen since.

The Search

In these more enlightened times, we do not wish to capture, enslave, or basically hurt smileys in any way. Unfortunately the domesticated smileys are so downtrodden after so many years of slavery that they refuse to communicate with us. The search is on for one of the remaining wild smileys, to aid the other smileys and to help us set them free.

Rumours have been heard that the leader of the wild smileys has been sneaking around H2G2, looking for its lost brethren. The Secret Smiley, as it had come to be called, must be found.

We plan to search for the secret smiley by using as many non-smileys as possible. We will type whatever tickles our fancy, within the sacred symbols that summon smileys, to see if a smiley appears. Once the invocation that calls forth the secret smiley is known, the smileys will be free to roam and multiply as they were meant to, and the number and variety of the new smileys made will be limitless.

Help us speed up the arrival of this happy day, join the search for the secret smiley.