call centres, the customer is always right (in their own alternate reality)
Created | Updated Jul 30, 2002
Call Centres are the places people ring in a screaming mad temper in the expectation that the managing director of the company will be ready and waiting to take the call with a well timed 'i'm listening'.
If the MD is perchance travelling the azure waters of he Med on their extortionate salary customers expect Anne Robinson to be filling in for him.
Despite the fact most people commonly regard call centres as sweat shops, callers don't ask themselves the question why would the MD be taking calls in a call centre at 23.45pm on a Sunday evening when they could be anywhere else in the world??
Mostly people who work in call centres or with customers anywhere in this world know that customers are nuts so the more irate callers get the more the people who work in call centres think, this caller has clearly lost the plot.
Call Centre Conversations
A customer who called a call centre asked the operator to courier deliver a package to him as he drove down the M6 between junctions 12 and 14 at a certain time and the customer then gave their registration number note to courier, wind down own window, wait for customer to do likewise, then aim for passenger seat he was DEADLY SERIOUS. The operator had to curb the desire to abuse said customer and respond in a polite and serious way.
A customer informed an operator he would sue if his phone did not work while he went skiing off piste as he could have an accident and he needed to be able call help. The operator being paid to take this enquiry seriously refrained from asking the obvious questions such as what happens if you break the phone in the fall? What happens if (ironically) your phone does work but you have broken both arms or are even unconcscious? Why should other people risk their lives saving you when you clearly have no confidence in your skiing ability?
I have heard tell of an hour long chat with a customer who could not get his phone to work only for his wife to walk past him and say 'darling thats the TV remote'
A customer even wanted to change his phone because his ear hair got stuck in it when he answered a call. In the operators mind the conversation went along the lines of EEEURRRRRRRGGHH, YUCK, YYEEOOOWW, YOU ARE DISGUSTING. However as a true call centre professional they just said no politely even refraining from a witty answer." Why sir, I can't change your phone but I will call our accessories line to see if they have a de-hairing device they can send."
In Summary
Call centre operatives are humans with feelings, intelligence and senses of humour but since they are paid not to ridicule customers, as ridiculing customers is not a recognised business strategy you will rarely uncover these traits when you call a call centre.
Oh yes, bosses do target call durations,call work and listen to calls (to check we are giving out the right information an behaving). Hey its a business they have to try to make money otherwise people would have to write a letter or even go into shops and banks and shout at real live people who might look upset and you'd feel sorry for them and then you would just accept things the way they were in a true British fashion.
1
1call duration is the specific length of time in which the business says the person taking the call should be able to speak to a customer, solve all of their problems and get them off the phone.
callwork is the time between the end of one call and the start of the next call and is used to monitor how efficient the call centre is. In this time operators are either doing work related to the last call or skiving. Thus a bosses ideal is that nobody ever spends any time in callwork and so any callwork is targeted by bosses.
callwork is the time between the end of one call and the start of the next call and is used to monitor how efficient the call centre is. In this time operators are either doing work related to the last call or skiving. Thus a bosses ideal is that nobody ever spends any time in callwork and so any callwork is targeted by bosses.
