The Lady Mourns for Grasshopper
Created | Updated Nov 15, 2010
When I discovered I was pregnant, it didn’t feel real. I hadn’t had much to do with babies, what with studying and then working full time. Would I know how to look after a baby? I watched young mothers with buggies cluttered with nappies and felt anxious.
Then I felt the baby move and it suddenly became a him. I was sure he was a boy, because of the way he moved around. He kicked, punched and jumped. That is when Lee came up with the nickname: Grasshopper.
So when Grasshopper stopped moving, I knew that there was something wrong. The staff at the hospital did a scan and told me what I dreaded to hear.
“I’m sorry, there’s no sign of a heartbeat. The baby must have died.”
I sat there in the hospital cubicle, listening to other mothers talking about their babies and felt totally lost. How could I go through labour, when I knew my baby was dead? I didn’t know how to make sense of my life any longer. All I could do was think of my little Grasshopper.