Visiting Singapore
Created | Updated May 31, 2002
Abstract
Singapore is artificial happiness on an island not bigger than an average city. It’s like in this computer game, Sim City, where you build a city from scratch by placing out industries, condos, shops and roads in the most functional and effective way as possible. There are no natural resources on Singapore: the very nice beaches on Sentosa island are 100% imported from Malaysia, the water all comes from a big pipeline from the main land and the nice looking forests you see everywhere are only a few meters deep.
The country itself is very clean and well structured. Chewing gums are forbidden, as are throwing any kind of garbage (cigarettes, tickets or whatever) on the street. If you are unlucky you might end up having to clean the streets for a day in a really ugly outfit and later the next day find yourself on the last page in the news papers, officially made fun out of. The two different directions of the MRT (subway) are clearly marked out with both the direction, a red or green color and the final destination sp there’s no way you can take the wrong one by accident.
The people
Singapore is a true mixed culture country. Chinese, malays, indians. arabs and europeans living all together. This is the greatest strength about Singapore and perhaps one of the reasons why this country grown so successful. It’s also the weak spot and despite the government doing its best to prevent racism, you notice it instantly: the chinese are the snobby rich ones, the malays are poor and lazy, indians are weird and mistrusted, the europeans are stupid and too different, and you stay away from arabs completely.
This is very sad because what they all have in common are that they are really nice, friendly and helpful. At least this is how you will be treated in most places. What they really think about you is something you will never know. In a typical chinese way you are gonna get judged in 2 seconds depending on what clothes you have, what car you drive, where you live and what position you have in the company where you work. Hint: finance at a multi national bank is a good thing to work with.
As a tourist you will be treated somewhat different. There are a few shops with signs that says “Same price for both tourists and singaporeans” but usually you have to find yourself in having to pay a little extra. Even the bus drivers can sometimes charge you a few cents differently for the same trip. Blonde hair won’t help you much since singaporeans are quite used to westerners, so save the bucks on dying it for the trip.
The language
Mandarin chinese is the official language as well as english and this is spoken by most people so it should not be any problem communicating or understanding signs and papers. However it takes a few days to get used to the way singaporeans speak english. Even if they write and speak english perfectly, they tend to use their own dialect called Singlish. It’s an effective and fast version of english with lots of the grammatics dropped and word order totally flipped:
“Eh, that Wendy ah, so glam one! Every week also got new dress!”
Don’t panic when singaporeans talk really fast, just ask tell them you didn’t understand (you talk slower can?) and they will switch to a more ordinary english. You’ll get used to it and it’s a fascinating and modern way of talking, although looked upon as slobby so don’t try impressing on business contacts with your new vocabulary.
What to wear
What to wear in Singapore is a whole science in itself, at least if you are a male. Wearing the hip expensive fashion you are used to if you live in Europe or the US is a big no-no, you will be looked upon as an Ah beng and that’s not a good thing. Black polished shoes, a nice ironed shirt and ironed pants from one of your suits is a much better choice. A good haircut is also a must -- not long ago you could actually be refused access to the country if you had a bad hair style. Remember, in this country it’s all about look and face, and you WILL be treated as the way you look.
Things to see
It’s really not about seeing typical tourist things in Singapore, it’s about the total experience. Wake up early, buy a few apples wrapped up in two different kinds of plastic protection, and start walking. There is no spot in the country where you can get lost and where ever you end up you will always have a road and houses in sight. A few places that should be visited:
- Sentosa Island -- the hand made beach resort. Be sure to check out the cannons that never was used because they pointed at the wrong direction.
- Zouk -- Night life in Singapore is great and Zouk is the coolest place of them all. A little expensive but you get a few free drink tickets.
- Night safari -- Take it easy, walking around in a huge forest in the dark can be a little scary. You never know what you will end up in front of.
- Food courts -- Really fine and cheap food. Try the noodles at Gey long road, it’s a blast.
- Raffle’s hotel -- It’s romantic, it takes you back in time, and all your friends will bug you forever if you don’t go there.
If you are tired the MRT will take you almost anywhere in the country, and the cabs can take you almost anywhere for a few bucks. Singapore is a beautiful and clean country so walking is preferred though.
The do not’s
- Don’t throw any kind of garbage on the street.
- Don’t try to move to Singapore. It’s tempting but it will take you years of fighting with the government and the paper work is ridicelous.
- Don’t give your mobile phone to cab drivers. Some of them might tell you that you can pay with your phone, but it will just be emptied of credits.
- Don’t expect the bus to stop just because you look at the driver, you have to wave your hand!
- Don’t be afraid, Singapore is a safe country, but don’t be stupid either.
- DON’T BRING DRUGS INTO THE COUNTRY. You can be judged to death penalty if caught.
Conclusion
If you want to buy cheap electronics, go visit Malaysia. If you are interested in a good night life, buy a ticket to Thailand instead. If you want to see a really large high tech megacity, go Hong Kong. For those who like asian culture, China would be a better choice. And if this is your first visit to asia and you want to take part of the crazy asian culture, you should definitely visit Japan instead.
Singapore is all of the above, but in a much smaller scale; a healthy amount of business, craziness and relaxation and that is what makes the country such a great place to be. If you’re staying in asia for a longer period, Singapore should definitely be considered. And you can always drive to Malaysia to get that cheap digital video camera.
Links
Homepage of Singapore
The brand new TalkingCock singlish dictionary
