h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, it's a commonly used figure of speech.

It is confusing to leave it in if Insall is a name though.

Was he one of many Insalls patrolling the skies that day?

Well, one often uses this convention if one doesn't know exactly who the individual iS. IE. i have been unable to discover either his name or initials. If I just write Sqn Ldr Insall, it presumes that he is somebody almost as famous as the Queen.

No it doesn't it just presumes that you know his name.

Its up to you of course but I still think it is confusing - I did assume Insall was a rank rather than a name until I read it through a second time.

'No it doesn't it just presumes that you know his name'.

Well, it presumes that this individual has already been mentioned beforehand, and so the reader should know who is being talked about... if you get my drift.

I'd much prefer to leave this as it is. It's my style of writing and should be commonly understood; one comes across it in novels. If the Editors think it should be changed then they can change it.

I've now discovered his name (Gilbert) and initials, so I've included his initials and removed the 'one'.

I discovered also some info about Arminghall Henge near Norwich, and added this as a FN with a link to the EG Entry on Norwich. (nb the Norwich Entry is exceedingly short and sparse and badly needs revamping if anyone wants yto take it on )

"Furthermore, 3.22km (about two miles) to the north east of Stonehenge"
'Furthermore' doesn't work there Al because the content of this sentence isn't properly following on from the previous one. I can see why you might have put it there - you'd have to start the sentence with a number without it. But you could replace it with something like 'Rather less known, and 3.22km (about two miles) to the north east of Stonehenge, lies the site now known as Woodhenge'.

for that, HB; I've made that alteration. You're right, I did struggle with the phraseology of that sentence.

Not to mention the order of the letters in my name

(dunno how I made that error, BH.

"which also had an avenue (The Avenue) leading down to the River Avon"
That sounds a bit odd. It's not like saying 'he also had a car (a Cortina)'. When I hear the word 'avenue' I think of a tree-lined street, particularly in the suburbs. Can you find another word or two instead of 'avenue' to give the reader a better idea of what it was? A pathway, a roadway, a horse-track?

Well, I was linking it with the avenue which Durrington Wall has/had.
However I've added the prefix 'earthwork' to it. Hope that's now satisfactory?

Your Guide Entry has just been picked from Peer Review by one of our Scouts, and is now heading off into the Editorial Process, which ends with publication in the Edited Guide. We've therefore moved this Review Conversation out of Peer Review and to the entry itself.

If you'd like to know what happens now, check out the page on 'What Happens after your Entry has been Recommended?' at EditedGuide-Process. We hope this explains everything.

Thanks for contributing to the Edited Guide!

(Thought it'd been forgotten!)

BigAl!

My congratulations also Here have a shagbark hickory smoked burger