Bunnies, a drinking game

1 Conversation



Bunnies is a drinking game enjoyed at proper Universities, especially by their sports clubs, throughout the British Isles, and indeed all over the world. After many years of evolution since its creation in the dim and distant past of all male halls of residence, eating fully gowned while in hall refectories, hockey being played on grass and such other now archaic practices, this pillar of British University tradition remains alive to this day as a vital part of a good social life.

The main functions of the game are to bring together the members of sports teams and instill in them a tremendous team spirit, to aid in the consumption of alcoholic beverages and, importantly, to introduce and test the abilities, mental and physical, of each year’s crop of fresh faced, bushy tailed freshers.

In order to play this entertaining and skillful game of logic and speed you will need the following.

  1. A pint of beer each (no halves, shorts, alcopops, wine, soft drinks etc. Cider is acceptable but rather careless, whereas snakebite and black is just asking for it.
  2. A minimum of four players (or three real and one virtual player, see "Pete Best" below), or preferably the rest of the team you play for. Alternatively several other "real" friends could join in, however they are more likely to refuse to play properly due to inadequate peer pressure. No more than 14 players is recommended.
  3. A table or other space around which there is room for you all to sit, facing each other in a circle.

The Rules of Bunnies:

1) Starting a "Round" of bunnies

Mr. Chairman (see below) will bring the "Circle" of seated (obligatory) players to attention with a loud call of "On The Hoveeeeeeeeer!!!!!!" At this point all players with extend both hands horizontally in front of them and waggle their hands from the wrist, in a hovering motion.

To start a round of bunnies, Mr. Chairman will drop the hover, slap his thighs audibly, then place his thumbs on his temples and wave his hands like bunny rabbit ears. This position is known as "having the bunny".

The two players on either side of the player with the bunny (in this case either side of Mr. Chairman) must "Mirror" the bunny with the hand closest to the bunny, by placing the adjacent thumb on the temple next to the bunny and waggling the hand. At this point the rest of the players will also drop the hover.

If the chairman fails to audibly slap his thighs and "takes" the bunny, this is merely a "dummy" and anyone attempting to drop the hover or mirror the dummy bunny will be fined at the end of the round. After the dummy start, Mr. Chairman will resume the hover and start with a real bunnies start or perhaps another dummy. (Freshers are particularly bad at falling for the dummy start and it has been used to great effect in fresher initiations.)

Celebrity Starts

Instead of the simple start described above, Mr. Chairman may elect another player to start with a simple start, or with a simple start followed by a designated pass, which must be completed correctly by the designated starter.

Also Mr. Chairman may start the game with on of several celebrity starts. These are a series of vocalisations and actions inserted before the thigh slap, and after the hover, and are imitated by the rest of the players. The intention of celebrity starts is to attract the attention of other persons minding their own business in the bar/saloon. This may have one of two outcomes:

  1. Attraction of more players into the game.
  2. Ejection from the premises.

An example of a popular celebrity start is "Ben Johnson Bunnies", named after the infamous Canadian sprinter, banned for taking performance enhancing drugs. The players all mime injecting steroids into their arms, sprint for 10 seconds on the spot whilst counting down from 10 to 0 as loudly as possible. This is followed by them pretending they are standing on the medals podium, reluctantly removing their gold medal from around their necks and handing it to the person to their left.

There are many of these celebrity starts. Other examples include the "Hawaii 5-0", "Nikki Lauda", "Ayrton Senna", "Manchester University Hockey Girls Warm Up" and "JFK assassination" starts.

2) Playing a Round of Bunnies

i) Posession of the bunny, and the object of the game.

The object of the game is to fool or catch out the other players with the speed, complexity and cunning of the various different ways it is possible to "Pass" the bunny. When the bunny is passed, the player having the bunny transfers possession of the bunny to another player, who must recognise that he is the recipient of the bunny and then "Take" possession of the bunny, by putting his thumbs to his temples and waggling his "bunny ears". Of course the players on either side of the new possessor of the bunny must "Mirror" the bunny. The player who has passed the bunny must fully remove his thumb(s) from his temples for the pass to be legitimate and must not spuriously regain possession of the bunny before it is passed to him again. The players who were mirroring the bunny of a player who has passed it must also remove their thumb from their temple and cease to mirror. Failure to adhere to these rules or any other will result in the player getting "Fined" at the end of the round. These fines are usually liquid and alcoholic resulting in the intoxication of the players, which of course is the actual object of the game.

Passing the bunny to another player.

There are very many ways to pass the bunny to another player. The most simple and common of which are listed below. There are many local variations in these "passes" which also evolve over time and by region.

Introduction of passes

Each different pass can only be used once it has been "introduced" and "demonstrated" by Mr. Chairman, before the start of a round of bunnies. To demonstrate a new pass, Mr. Chairman will call the hover, then take a virtual bunny and demonstrate the pass with the assistance of appropriate mirroring. Passes must be performed in the exact manner in which they are demonstrated, without any hint of ambiguity or confusion.

Passes introduced before previous rounds of bunnies are still valid and do not need to be repeatedly introduced and demonstrated before each round. People who are not present during the introduction of a new pass (perhaps having issued a trunk call in order to buy another beverage, see below) must not be informed of the fact the new pass is in effect (a good way to stitch up freshers). The passes were named according to their university or person of origin.

Dummy passes

There exist several dummy passes which can be used to trick another player into picking up the bunny when it had not in fact been "passed" or "thrown" to that player, or has actually been passed to a different player, other than the one the dummy is directed at. Picking up the bunny from a dummy pass is, of course, very stupid indeed and can easily be avoided by paying attention. Consequently freshers often fall foul of dummies. Dummies are never intentionally demonstrated before a round of bunnies by Mr. Chairman, but can be explained by Mr. Chairman to players who have fallen foul of them, between rounds.

The passes

New bunnies passes (and other accessory rules) should be introduced into the game, over progressive rounds, to increase the difficulty level, in the following order. As the list goes on, the order becomes less critical. Passing the bunny may also be referred to as "Throwing the Bunny". The author advises the reader that real rabbits should not be thrown under any circumstances, and that no rabbits were harmed in the writing of this piece.

A) The Simple Pass, or Throw:

Both thumbs are released from the temple and the arms are stretched out horizontally with the hands together, and the index fingers pointing clearly at another player, who must then pick up the bunny.

The Nod dummy: The player with the bunny feigns a simple pass by pointing with his index fingers nodding in the direction of the player to be dummied. His thumbs never leave his temples, so the bunny is never released.

The Stare dummy: The passing player stares at another player other than the one he is passing to. He uses his good looks and engaging personality to fool the player being stared at that he is the one being passed to. This is a surprisingly effective dummy pass, again freshers being unusually vulnerable, and has been the subject of the final year dissertation of many a psychology student. It may be used during any kind of pass.

B) One man pass, or Leeds pass:

The player with the bunny removes one of his thumbs from his temple, and the bunny is passed to the player next to him on the same side that the remaining bunny ear of the passing player is still waggling. So if the left hand is dropped, the bunny is passed one man to the right and visa versa.

Loughbrough dummy: The hand that drops the bunny is used to point at the player to be dummied. Of course the real Leeds pass is to the player next to the passing player. For example a player issues a Leeds to his left, by dropping his right hand, but points with that right hand across the circle at another player. If this other player picks up the bunny, then he is in error, and will be fined at the end of the round. Also, the recipient of the Leeds pass to the left of the passing player may fall for the Loughbrough dummy and fail to pick up the Leeds pass coming form the passing player on his right. In this case he would also be fined.

Robbie Watson dummy: The ear is cupped by the closed hand instead of having the thumb of the passing hand on the temple, and the pass in fact goes to the player that is being pointed at with the other hand. A kind of double bluff (Advanced play only, the only dummy that has to be "introduced").

C) Two man pass, or Bradford pass:

The player with the bunny removes both thumbs form his temples, and then places one thumb on his nose with the palm of the hand facing in one direction or the other around the circle. The direction that the palm faces in determines the direction the pass goes in. So if the left hand is being used, the bunny is passed to the player next but one on the right of the passing player. So the bunny is passed two players to the right. The reverse is also true for the right hand. The Loughbrough dummy (see above) may also be used during a Bradford pass.

D) Three man pass, or Exeter pass:

The player with the bunny removes one thumb from one of his temples and puts it on his nose, with the palm facing in the direction of the pass. The bunny is thus passed to the player 3 players along the circle in the direction of the palm.

E) Four man pass, or MUTECH pass:

The player passing the bunny removes both thumbs from his temples and lays on hand, palm down, on the top of his head, and puts the thumb of the other hand on his nose with the palm of that hand facing in the direction of the pass. The bunny is thus passed four players around the circle in the direction of the palm. A common mistake: Putting on hand on the top of his head and leaving the other one with the thumb on the temple. This is a very stupid mistake indeed and must be heavily fined. Apart from anything else it looks silly. Bunnies can be played with minimum of four players (or three real and one virtual player, see "Pete Best"). Thus the 4 man pass can by used to pass to oneself in this case, with hilarious but sometimes boring results.

F) Brammall Bounce:

The passing player stands up and essentially "throws" a simple pass up to the ceiling. The pass bounces off the ceiling, and is picked up by the first player to stand up and receive it with outstretched arms. The bunny is then taken up by the happy recipient and play continues. Brammall lane is of course the home ground of Sheffield United Football Club, but why this pass is named after it is a source of perpetual debate in the bunnies world. The possibility exists that this pass originated at Sheffield Polytechnical College (now Hallam "University"), but the author finds this unlikely since it would take a degree of intellect impossible to find at an ex poly to come up with such a fine bunnies pass.

G) Five man pass, or Cosmic pass:

The passing player releases both thumbs and takes hold of his chin with the thumb and index finger of one hand. Then, stranding up and with the loud shout of "Coooooosssssmmmmiiiiiccccccccc!!!!!!!" throws the bunny around the circle with that hand in the direction of the palm.

H) Olympic bunnies:

Once the game gets going and the players are becoming complacent or casual with their passes, Mr. Chairman will introduce "Olympic Bunnies", where the bunny can not be retained by a player for more than 1-3 seconds (at the discretion of the committee). Players stalling their passes, not giving quick decisive passes, languishing in possession of the bunny intentionally or otherwise just not getting on with it will be fined at the end of the round.

This rule is vital to the essence of bunnies, affording the game play a requirement for quick thinking, high levels of concentration and deft elegant passing. Experienced players will often start the game with Olympic speed already in force in an effort to further hone their bunnies skills and make the game harder. A competent game of bunnies should be played at such a pace that the casual observer is rendered mesmerised by the velocity of the action. Most commonly american observers will be overheard expressing bemusement and disbelief at what they are seeing. As with cricket, the finer points of bunnies will forever remain mysterious to those from over the pond, due to their innate inability to comprehend such complex goings on.

I) UMIST refusal:

Any pass may be refused by the intended recipient of that pass with a UMIST refusal. This consists of the intended recipient loudly slapping their opposite shoulders with their hands in a crossed over formation. Then the bunny is taken again by the player who was trying to pass it. There may only be TWO UMIST refusals in each round. Any player committing the most heinous and despicable bunnies crime of the third UMIST refusal (spit!) will be subjected to a fine as follows. While standing on a chair or table, the guilty player must consume eight digits while rotating on the spot, with contributions to fill his vessel from other players if needed. This most disgusting of bunnies offences must never go unpunished. Repeat offenders are likely to be ejected for the game and have to live in shame for the rest of their pitiful university careers, if not their remaining hopefully short life.

A variation of this rule is "The Mirrior", with the same rules other than both hands are put together with palms facing out at the direction of the pass to reflect it back at the player making the pass.

J) Reverse Bunnies:

For the experienced bunnies player only, these subtle complexities of the game are difficult to master, often requiring years of practice and careful interpretation of the rules.

The bunny can be reversed only during the course of a pass. A player can not reverse it by himself for himself. The bunny can only be reversed by the player making the pass, and never by the player receiving the pass.

In order to reverse the bunny, a "simple pass" is modified such that the arms cross over themselves, but still point at the intended recipient. This is a "Reversed Throw". Once this pass is made, the player receiving the reversed throw takes the bunny in a reversed manner: The left thumb is paced on the right temple and visa versa, with the palms facing backwards. Similarly the reverse bunny is reverse mirrored. For instance a player on the right of a reversed bunny will place his left thumb on his right temple, instead of the right thumb.

Once the bunny is reversed, it may be made "normal" again by throwing another "reversed pass" with the arms crossed. Thus, a reversed bunny thrown with a "reversed throw" (with crossed arms) is picked up as a "normal" bunny. However, if a reversed bunny is thrown with the arms straight and not crossed as a straight throw, the bunny remains reversed and must be picked up as a reversed bunny.

All the other passes may be carried out with reverse modification as follows: For a reverse two man pass, the pass goes in the direction of the back of the hand not the palm. The same is true for the reverse three and four man passes. For the reverse three man pass the hand not on the nose is left in a reverse mirror like configuration. In the reverse four man pass the hand not on the nose is placed palm upwards on top of the head. A reverse cosmic pass is thrown in the direction of the back of the hand. A reversed bunny which is passed with one of the "reversed" forms of a pass remains reversed, until the bunny is normalised with a "reversed throw".

In an interesting and potentially confusing set of variations on the Brammall bounce, the bunny may be reversed or normalised by crossing the arms while pointing at the upper playing surface. Also the reverse of the Brammall bounce may be used, the so called "Llammarb bounce". To perform this move the bunny is thrown with either straight or crossed arms (depending in whether the bunny is to become reversed, become normal, or remain reversed or normal) at the floor under the table. As in the Brammall bounce, the first player to pick up the bunny in the correct manner by pointing with both hands at the floor "takes" the bunny.

K) Pete Best.

Not only was Pete Best the fifth and forgotten member of popular Mersey beat combo, The Beatles, but also an exceptionally gifted sportsman and most "Olympic" of bunnies players. His memory lives on as a virtual player who may be introduced at any time in the game. He is given a drink, a place in the circle (commonly between Mr. Chairman and an unwitting fresher) in which nobody must sit, on risk of a heavy fine.

Pete commands the utmost respect of all players. Any form abuse, verbal or physical, directed at Pete will be fined in the most severe manner. Pete has a few peculiarities that must be accommodated for when he is present in the circle. Pete is always the best and fastest bunnies player in the circle. He always passes the bunny back to whoever passes it to him , but not always in the same manner in which it was passed to him. For instance, a player my pass to Pete with a simple pass, but almost instantaneously receive the bunny again from a Brammall Bounce pass from Pete, requiring the player to stand up to receive it correctly. Should any player issue a Brammal Bounce or any other pass that is picked up by the first player to get it, Pete, of course being the fastest, always gets it before anyone else, then passes it back again to the original passer.

Pete is always up for going on away trips, especially in university competitions, and is a regular on many a team sheets. I for one included him in all of mine as captain of the UEA 1st XI field hockey team, which allowed the odd "ringer" to join us on the pitch as required.

L) EV:

EV is an acronym for Empty Vessel. If a vessel is freed of its contents as a result of general beverage consumption or as a result of a "fine", then it must not be simply returned to the playing surface. Instead, the rim of the vessel must be tapped gently on the playing surface, and then the base of the vessel touched down twice before the player releases his grip. The fine for failing to EV is a statutory eight digits to be performed upstanding.

M) Shoe Pints:

Any player causing physical damage to, breakage of, or loss of any drinking vessel, intentionally or unintentionally, is fined a "Shoe Pint". The player must remove an item of footwear suitable for safely holding at least four finger’s worth of beverage, and fill it with an alcoholic refreshment. Another player’s footwear may be used if the offenders footwear in not considered by the committee to be smelly enough. The offending player will then consume the contents of the footwear whilst being upstanding, to a chorus of the popular melody: "Why was he born so beautiful…..".

3) Getting the players together, and in order.

Initiation of the game, and selection of Mr. Chairman

Upon orgaising the game to happen, there will be a long winded voting procedure masquerading as a democratic process to elect the position of Mr. Chairman. This may take the form of several nominations followed by at least 5 minutes or arguing, after which the identity of Mr. Chairman is resolved fairly (or unfairly) with a (fixed/loaded) three round game of paper scissors stone. The person who has been designated at the start of the season to take up this role (usually the club chairman/president/etc) will almost invariably win the contest regardless of the actual outcome, despite all heckling and other protests of infringement of democratic rights and election gerrymandering. The winner is now known only as Mr. Chairman.

Mr. Chairman is the sole arbiter and judge of the game whose decision is final and technically is always right (see later for exceptions). His fines may be as fair or unfair as he sees fit, and he can fine anything he likes, with as harsh and unfair a fine as he likes.

Formation and integrity of the circle.

After the above voting procedure, all players will sit down in the "circle". From this point they may no longer:

A) Talk to other persons outside the circle (including "real friends", girl/boyfriends etc.) This is part of what is called "Speaking out of turn", described below.

B) Stand up, unless:

  1. The game is in recess (see below)
  2. They have been instructed to do so by Mr. Chairman or another committee member.
  3. Are wishing to answer the call of nature / visit the bar to refill their pint (see trunk calls below)
  4. Are performing a bunnies "pass" which requires standing.

C) Point with the index finger, since this is considered to be extremely rude. Instead, the elbow may be used to indicate direction.

Mr. Chairman may call the game into recess, in which the circle is temporarily disbanded while more beverages are purchased "en masse" or some other situation has to be dealt with, such as a boat race, the rugby club being thrown out of the bar, or a fresher being sick etc.

The use of Fines.

Mr. Chairman and other members of the committee will punish players who break any of the rules of the game, behave in any manner which the committee dislikes, are a fresher, or in fact for no better reason other than they want to. These punishments are in the form of fines, consisting most often of alcoholic liquid consumption.

Fines are given in varying degrees of severity depending on how "Heinous" the "Crime" was, at the discretion of the committee. Fines are issued in measures of "Digits", see Mr. Weights and Measures below.

Fines are most often issued at the end of a "Round" of bunnies, but may be issued at any other time for technical infringements or matters of discipline.

All fines must be "Taken" in full as soon as physically possible after they have been issued. Failure to "Take" a fine will result in general derision, public humiliation and ejection form the game.

The Cavalry Charge.

At any point, any player with more than half a pint of beverage in his vessel may stand up and point to the horizon with the shout "The Cavalry are Coming!!!!!!" At which point all the other players will also stand up, and all players will then finish off whatever beverage remains in their glass. A recess is often called after a Cavalry Charge, in order to purchase more refreshments or to get on the bus and go home. A player issuing a Cavalry Charge with less than half a pint left is just trying to catch the other players out with a dummy charge. If any other player finishes their beverage by mistake by falling for this dummy, more fool them.

A variation on this rule is a call of "Around the World". The same basic rules apply, the difference being that the player calling this move simply stands up and says "Around the world to my left/right!". The other players then stand up and finish their beverages in turn around the circle in the direction the move was called.

Trunk Calls

Any player wishing to leave the circle, must request to do so by issuing a "Trunk Call" to Mr. Chairman. Trunk calls can not be issued while the actual game is in progress, only between rounds. A trunk call is issues by the player rising to his feet and simultaneously raising his elbow to his nose and waving his arm about like an elephant’s trunk. The player will at this time shout "Miiiiiiiiiiiiissssttteeeerrrrrr Chairman" in a sort of elephant trumpeting manner, followed by either:

  1. If wanting to urinate: "Permission to point Percy/Patricia" Percy being the one eyed trouser snake and Patricia being the female equivalent. "At the pan." may be added at the end of the statement. Alternatively females may use the following "My furry funbox is flooded."
  2. If wanting a beverage: "Permission to visit the saloon".

Mr. Chairman must acknowledge the trunk call before the player can leave the circle. In order to reenter the circle, another trunk call must be issued before sitting down, using the statement "Permission to reenter the circle". Once acknowledged by Mr. Chairman the player may be reseated. Players can not reenter the game during a round of bunnies.

The Committee and their roles in fining players.

To assist Mr. Chairman in his fining duties and to keep certain other things in order, several committee members are appointed at the start of the game by Mr. Chairman. Mr. Chairman is a committee member and is governed by the same general rule as the rest of his committee. This general rule is: Double fines for committee members, i.e. a fine that might usually be a two digit offense (such as failing to mirror the bunny) must be taken as four by a committee member. This rule keeps the standard of the committee high, as any player on the committee who is a poor bunnies player will quickly amass so many digits of beer in fines that he will become highly intoxicated and likely to vomit or pass out.

1) Referred to as Mr. Chief Sneak, this player carefully watches the game play and points out infringements of the rules that Mr. Chairman might have missed. He will be formally requested for "Any other fines" by Mr. Chairman at the end of each "Round" of bunnies. Several Assistant chief sneaks may also be appointed is the circle is large. Most importantly, Mr. Chief Sneak is responsible for ending each round of bunnies when play degenerates in to confusion or a player commits a heinous breach of the rules. Upon either of these happening he issues a call of "Hold It Right There!!!!" While standing up and making a horizontal sweeping movement with his right arm. At this point the round is ended and he may begin to assist Mr. Chairman in issuing fines as appropriate.

2) Referred to as Mr. Weights and Measures, this player determines the size of each fine as administered by Mr. Chairman, who will often but not always suggest a size for the fine. Fines are delivered and paid in a number of "digits" (not fingers of course) worth of a beverage in a pint vessel. For instance, Mr. Bellend (A fresher) makes the stupid mistake of falling for Mr. Chairman's Loughbrough dummy. At the end of the round of bunnies, Mr. chairman points out the fine moves on to more important business. Mr. Weights and Measures then instructs Mr. Bellend to consume two digits of beer. This entails Mr. Bellend picking up his vessel (with the appropriate hand(s), see "chirality" below), and using the width of two of his digits as a measure from the surface level of the beverage. He then consumes from the vessel until the surface level of the beverage is at the bottom of his two digits. As a guide, a whole pint measures 8 digits.

Mr. Weights and Measures is also responsible for the "Chirality" of beverage consumption. This he determines with the use of a cigarette packet or other suitable object. At the start of the game, Mr. Chairman instructs Mr. Weights and Measures to show the players which hand they must consume with, depending on which way the box lies on the playing surface. For instance, standing on end is left handed, on the side is right handed, and flat on the large side is both hands. The portion of the box may be changed and any time by Mr. Weights and Measures only. Players consuming with incorrect chirality are fined accordingly.

3) Referred to as Mr. Thumb. This player, initially secretly appointed by Mr. Chairman sometime into the game, can at any time place his right thumb on the upper playing surface. At this point the round of bunnies finishes, and all players continue to play at their own risk. The last player to realise the round had been interrupted by Mr. Thumb by following his suit by also placing his right thumb on the playing surface, is the loser. He is fined four fingers. However, he may gamble double or quits on the call of a tossed coin. A new round of bunnies is started and the player who was last to get his right thumb on the table is now Mr. Thumb, and my interrupt the game at any time, by placing his right thumb on the playing surface.

It is, of course, illegal to inform a player verbally that Mr. Thumb has interrupted the round. However, careful use of the elbow pointing technique and other non verbal methods my be employed to inform one's friends of the interruption, such that an unwitting fresher gets the wrap. Use of the left thumb is a dummy, and any player following the dummy will be fined accordingly.

4) Mr. Nose: Similar in concept to Mr. Thumb, Mr. Nose interrupts the game by placing his nose on the playing surface. The same rules apply as for Mr. Thumb. Mr. Nose may also place his nose on any available surface, such as another player’s back, a nearby wall or door, a light fitting, the saloon etc. These variations are of doubtless humor, but should be exercised with extreme caution as they tend to be disruptive the game and the continued presence of the players in that particular saloon, due to attracting unwanted attention from the saloon staff/bouncers.

Issues Regarding Names

Females are fully permitted and in fact should be actively encouraged to play bunnies. They can not, however, retain their female status during the game and must, like all the other players, assume a pseudonym. All names must be started with Mr. and can be anything of the player’s choice. Some of the more militant feminist players may resort to such silly names as Mr. Ms. This is absolutely fine and within their rights, of course. Mr. Chairman may however overrule anyone's name due to them being a member of "the committee" see below, or just because he doesn't like it. Mr. Chairman will replace the name with one he deems more fitting. A female Chairperson is still called Mr. Chairman.

Once the names of all the players have been decided and set by a round of names, where each player in turn gives his name such that all players can hear it, they may only be referred to by that name for the rest of the game. Failure to use the correct name may be fined at the discretion of Mr. Chairman.

At any point Mr. Chairman may instruct of the committee members to repeat the round of names, by saying out load the name of each player in the circle. Every name that the committee member fails to get right earns him a digit of beer as a fine. Names must be correctly correlated with the players to whom they belong. Attempting to get away with calling the freshers all Mr. Fresher, and suchlike ruses are not acceptable.

Language and communication

Swearing or any other kind of crude language or verbal abuse is not permitted. Bunnies is a sociable, orderly, friendly and logical game. No room exists in the game for "Speaking out of turn" in which a player vocalises to any other player or person outside the circle, unless he is a committee member or has been invited to speak by Mr. Chairman.

A player may attempt to attract the attention of Mr. Chairman only with either a Trunk Call, or by raising his elbow (not his hand, since that would be considered very rude and result in a fine for pointing). Failure to adhere to this law of silence will quickly result in the disintegration of the game into very noisy lawless anarchy. This state of affairs is generally considered to be "Very Poor", and it is Mr. Chairman’s responsibility to keep noisy and easily distracted players minds focussed on the game by maintaining a continuum of flow in the game and repeatedly fining offenders.

Any kind of argument about fairness or dissatisfaction with allocation of fines is strictly prohibited. No pointing with index finger is allowed, as this is very rude indeed. Instead a player may bring attention to another player or himself by using the much less offensive elbow as a pointing tool.

The following list of words are unacceptable in a bunnies circle and must be substituted for by the following phrases respectively:

Incorrect wordCorrect word
TablePlaying surface
CeilingUpper playing surface
Beer/Drink (noun)Beverage
Drink (verb)Consume/Imbibe

Particularly heavy fines may be incurred by failure to adhere to these rules.

Concluding comments

I hope these far from exhaustive rules give the inexperienced or novice bunnies player the tools to be able to fully enjoy their post match festivities in their or someone else’s students union / sports club bar. I write them in the face the wrath of many a die hard bunnies player, who would argue that the rules of the sacred game should never be written down, but leaned only from hard experience and the fines associated with that. But in these days of mobile communications, the internet, and the changing face of the student population, who seem less and less interested in the playing of such games as bunnies, and more and more interested in not behaving in a loud obnoxious manner in order to look "cool", I feel it necessary to lay the rules down for ever in the hope of a return of a more civilised age which may one day realise again the full potential of this most noble of games.


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