H2G2 subregion USA
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
entry: jfk-immigration-2-hr-wait
Even though my intergalactic Sabena (not because it is out of this world but more because the service levels are unvbelievable) transmutation from Brussel to NY recently arrived on time, just 0.001 parsecs after departue, and despite my super duper space passport (for UK readers, my Schengen-legal laissez passez for the real Europe) contained an A2 exaulted ranking Visa of "sometimes important person but not when there is a queue", the queues were gigantic, the air conditioning suggesting global warming - something I thought humans understood by 2001 but it seems americans are exceptions, or was this a micro climate holodeck implementation of life in 2001 I asked myself) - had come early - didn't help the emotion levels.
But I could understand, people who wished to enter the land of the free had to wait, and what was 2 earth hours after ALL?
Was this not the land of ultimate freedom? Where individuals were free not to vote and then not wonder why jerks ran their country, not to answer your question about the menu, not to strive for an IQ level of 100 (which by our time was the minimum to survive the 5+ exams the IGCouncil imposed to keep numbers of dumb infants down), where everyone had the right to carry a gun (surely only the state had the right to kill people), and where 2950 winchester shot-gun cartridges are offered at Wal-Mart (an early hyper-space-market, and where 5410 students and teachers were either killed or injured at school so they must have sold two boxes allowing for 10% wastage for duds) were on special at $29 right next to the back to school offers, where you could park anywhere except anywhere where there was a sign, a fire hydrant or a yellow line which meant most people in New York didn't' have a car as the nearest bit of kerb that met these requirements was last seen in the Hamptons in Connecticut some years before it became trendy. People sat in MacDonalds not because of the juicy cuisine (it is said they did serve some meat sometimes but by 1990 it had becomes too contentious) but because it was the cheapest way to park the car. The country where the first president was opposed to slavery but had 218 of them when he died (slavery is an earlier 18th - 19th century version of being a housewife, I am told), where the "movies" were static cinemas and a take out meant putting it into a bag. Where a 17 year old could drive a car but had to be 27 before he culd buy cigarettes and in some states drink alcohol provided he could show that he was over 21 and under 35. Where the president could get a blow job from a sucker and ruin cigars paid for by tax payer and he's rewarded by his wife getting into the Senate (where more [Cuban] cigars are smoked than anywhere else in those days).
To cut my visit short and get to the nub of it all. This country has more street furniture than and Intergalactic highway. There are more rules and regulation than in CentreParc! Some are highly complex. One read "Parking allowed for a maximum of 2 hrs. Mon-Fri 10 a.m. - 3 .pm. 3hrs Sat Sun and Public Holidays. No Parking on March 17. No parking when snow Over 2 inch. If snow over 2 inch towed at owners expense. Compact Cars only. Have a nice day." Now at a time when there was just 6 billion homo-s this seemed overkill, but also I noticed the sign was so big it blocked the parking space because it had to be repeated in spanish, which I didn't figure out but looking at a map, New York is about level with Spain so that was really nice of them do that, if someone overshot their parking space in Madrid (where there are no signs in english in case someone overshot their space in New York).
But land of the free, excuse me. There are more do's and don'ts, and they differ across 50 states and 4273 counties and 19,239 towns and cities who make their own laws. No wonder the rat population boomed in towns. Some transmuted and became musical. But in those days rats were called lawyers the H2G2 tells me. But overall they were very perceptive people, as many said, when asked a question, i shoudl take a hike. Now how did they know what we'd be doing now ??????
Even though my intergalactic Sabena (not because it is out of this world but more because the service levels are unvbelievable) transmutation from Brussel to NY recently arrived on time, just 0.001 parsecs after departue, and despite my super duper space passport (for UK readers, my Schengen-legal laissez passez for the real Europe) contained an A2 exaulted ranking Visa of "sometimes important person but not when there is a queue", the queues were gigantic, the air conditioning suggesting global warming - something I thought humans understood by 2001 but it seems americans are exceptions, or was this a micro climate holodeck implementation of life in 2001 I asked myself) - had come early - didn't help the emotion levels.
But I could understand, people who wished to enter the land of the free had to wait, and what was 2 earth hours after ALL?
Was this not the land of ultimate freedom? Where individuals were free not to vote and then not wonder why jerks ran their country, not to answer your question about the menu, not to strive for an IQ level of 100 (which by our time was the minimum to survive the 5+ exams the IGCouncil imposed to keep numbers of dumb infants down), where everyone had the right to carry a gun (surely only the state had the right to kill people), and where 2950 winchester shot-gun cartridges are offered at Wal-Mart (an early hyper-space-market, and where 5410 students and teachers were either killed or injured at school so they must have sold two boxes allowing for 10% wastage for duds) were on special at $29 right next to the back to school offers, where you could park anywhere except anywhere where there was a sign, a fire hydrant or a yellow line which meant most people in New York didn't' have a car as the nearest bit of kerb that met these requirements was last seen in the Hamptons in Connecticut some years before it became trendy. People sat in MacDonalds not because of the juicy cuisine (it is said they did serve some meat sometimes but by 1990 it had becomes too contentious) but because it was the cheapest way to park the car. The country where the first president was opposed to slavery but had 218 of them when he died (slavery is an earlier 18th - 19th century version of being a housewife, I am told), where the "movies" were static cinemas and a take out meant putting it into a bag. Where a 17 year old could drive a car but had to be 27 before he culd buy cigarettes and in some states drink alcohol provided he could show that he was over 21 and under 35. Where the president could get a blow job from a sucker and ruin cigars paid for by tax payer and he's rewarded by his wife getting into the Senate (where more [Cuban] cigars are smoked than anywhere else in those days).
To cut my visit short and get to the nub of it all. This country has more street furniture than and Intergalactic highway. There are more rules and regulation than in CentreParc! Some are highly complex. One read "Parking allowed for a maximum of 2 hrs. Mon-Fri 10 a.m. - 3 .pm. 3hrs Sat Sun and Public Holidays. No Parking on March 17. No parking when snow Over 2 inch. If snow over 2 inch towed at owners expense. Compact Cars only. Have a nice day." Now at a time when there was just 6 billion homo-s this seemed overkill, but also I noticed the sign was so big it blocked the parking space because it had to be repeated in spanish, which I didn't figure out but looking at a map, New York is about level with Spain so that was really nice of them do that, if someone overshot their parking space in Madrid (where there are no signs in english in case someone overshot their space in New York).
But land of the free, excuse me. There are more do's and don'ts, and they differ across 50 states and 4273 counties and 19,239 towns and cities who make their own laws. No wonder the rat population boomed in towns. Some transmuted and became musical. But in those days rats were called lawyers the H2G2 tells me. But overall they were very perceptive people, as many said, when asked a question, i shoudl take a hike. Now how did they know what we'd be doing now ??????
