h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

ohh these fags are great Deaks!

*exhales smoke, forgets for a moment that she is a Goddess and blows rather hard, the ring of fire goes out*

opps

i will try to be more gentle!

Foxes!!! I'm allergic to foxes!!!

*Starts sneezing, covering CCC and the foxes in gooey snot, rendering them immobile*



*takes some pills to stop sneezing*

*wipes the snot off*

that's just disgusting ferret!

Deakie, i hope you have fire insurance, some of your goods are a bit charred. sorry!

*s ferrets feet into a subbuteo bowl shape, punches BF until he rocks back then when he rocks forward punches him again a few hundred times*

Yowch!

*clicks his fingers, causing quick dry cement to pour over CCC*

My poor legs attached to this round bowl thig

*a huge hand appears and flicks BF away from CCC to the far side of the warehouse*

Deaks whats this bout a shady deal? You should know my friend i am ALWAYS down for a shady deal!!!!!

*pulls Nik off to one side, out of the way of the fight*

Well the thing is, I could do with another partner to meet with a few of my contacts vis a vis handling their merchandise. You know the stuff, small volume, large value products. Top of the range quality goods. I could let you in for say....... 25%?

*calls forth his scallwags and they use their car scratching skills to chip away the quick drying cement, CCC steps out of the cement remains and stretches*

Oooh that's much better.

*the scallywags vanish as quickly as they appeared, CCC ties the immobile ferret to his helium filled lemmings and pushes him out the door and watches as he floats gently away*

*after an hour of strugglig, shaking and getting generally annoyed with the plastic holding his feet BF manages to shake it off*

*unfortuantely he is now a long way up in the air...*

CCC!

*Attaches two three sided squares to his back, creating a pair of wings. deflates the helium filled lemmings and makes them vanish. He then swoops down throught the warehouse door with a
golf club, thwacking CCC with all the force of a 1 mile sky dive*

Let me think for a minute So i have to meet the dodgy contacts & risk my face getting known to the police/guardia/national!!!! And then i'd be handling the stock, distrubuting it, dealing with the dodgy customers & then couriering 75% of the profits directly to you who is supervising?

Yup that sounds like a great idea when can i start boss?

You already have started, give me your handbag a second, Mario slipped a few bits in there when you were walking along the street to get here!

*flies across the warehouse and crashes into some crates from the golf shot*

ow.

humph.

*gets up and s the golfclub into a boa constrictor that wraps itself around Ferret's neck*

Ohhh i noticed & passed it straight on to Luigi i thought thats what i was supposed to do

Oooh! A snake, haven't held one of these for ages

*starts turning purple*

Hmmm... This could hurt if I don't do something soon.

*pulls out two slightly bent teaspoons, and pries the snake off his neck, passing it to Deaks to make a handbag and shoes set for her dodgy dealings...*

i thought purple suited you.

*s Ferret to be covered in purple paint, with no unpainted part to let his skin breath*

*A freak blast of paint stripper shoots through the warehouse, taking the paint off everything in sight*

*BF is hopping mad now*

*BF Charges at CCC with a wleding torch*

*sidesteps the charging ferret and he welds himself to the forklift. CCC jumps in the driving seat and drives the fork lift into a wall repeatedly.*

*cutting up through the dented forklift truck, BF's welding torch cuts through the seat of the truck, and CCC's legs*
*the crashing of the forklift truck just makes BF's aim worse, and as well as CCC's legs he also burns through half of CCC's torso*

*leaps away from the forklift and s himself better*

oi ya little pest!

*s an anvil above ferret, trapped against the fork lift and drops it on his head*

*calling on ten helium filled lemmings, BF uses their buoyancy to help him catch the Anvil on his little finger*

*Throws the anvil at CCC, and frees himself from the fork lift and circle CCC*

*catches the anvil and lobs it out the window. outside we here the crashing of cars*

oops.