Milkshakes - The Real Deal

2 Conversations

Hamilton Beach may sound like an oxymoron to anybody who has paid a visit to this New Zealand river city, but, for those who remember the glory days of dairying, it is a name that resonates with memories of creaming soda and double lime, two straws and frosted aluminium. Not the dairying of cows and better butter, which makes Hamilton rich, but of chrome and America's contribution to taste, the Hamilton Beach milkshake machine.

Heart Of The Milkbar

Hamilton Beach's deco brackets, their pods poised above gleaming mixer arms that delivered milkshakes in cool, tall aluminium beakers, were the heart of the milkbar at a time when milk was the cool drink. So cool that heavy dudes, Harley riders, even, were known as milkbar cowboys and jukebox music was eroding the moral fabric of the western world. Great milkbars were places of style and social consequence when pubs were slop houses and restaurants served no wine; serious places that demanded serious drinking, and there was nothing more serious than a milkshake.

Simply Difficult

One of the truths of mixing drinks, as it is of preparing food, is that the simplest things are in fact the most difficult, and by them the abilities of chefs and bartenders are measured. With food, it is the making of oil and vinegar salad dressing, or perhaps the deceptively straightforward process of preparing a creme anglais. With drinks, milkshakes are right in there with coffee and the much-vaunted challenge of the martini. All are drinks that depend on the best of raw materials, consummated by the art of blending with balance, subtlety and flair, delivering a light, creamy, flavoured skein of dense foam.

Dead As The Milkbar

But the milkshake is as dead as the milkbar1 , even in New Zealand where they claim to be the home of the finest natural milk sucked out of cows anywhere. As is the case all over the world, they stopped using real milk years ago, in favour of a watered-down version that is thickened with animal fat instead of ice cream, making a sweet, dairy food slurry of indeterminate origin. No wonder they are not called milkshakes any more, just shakes.

But if you can get hold of an old Hamilton Beach, or even use your own blender, you can make the real thing. Ice-cream, fresh milk, some flavouring such as your favourite liqueur, the magic of bubbles and you have it.

Hokey Chokey

Ingredients

  • 1 scoop of hokey pokey ice cream.2

  • 400ml cold milk, preferably fresh from a Jersey, but a carton will do.

  • 75ml white Creme de Cacao (brown is fine, if you don't mind the dirty look).

Method

  • Put all the ingredients in a blender or Hamilton Beach aluminium milkshake container, plug in, switch on and whiz until mixed to an even, frothy state, then pour into a glass, or, if you have an inclination to nostalgia (and you are over 40), leave in the now well-frosted aluminium.

  • Finally, give yourself a moustache and drink it straight from the glass, otherwise the lumps of hokey pokey will get stuck in the straw.

Price: b****r all. Available: wherever you can plug in the machine.

Hokey Pokey Ice-cream

Ingredients

  • 4 heaped tbsp granulated sugar
  • 2 heaped tbsp golden syrup
  • 1 level tsp bicarbonate of soda
  • 1 litre vanilla ice-cream

Method

  • In a heavy-based pan, allow the sugar and syrup to dissolve slowly over a low heat, stirring well. Increase the heat to medium and bring to the boil, stirring constantly.

  • Once you see bubbles, reduce the heat slightly and simmer for five minutes, stirring frequently, until it is a deep golden-brown colour, but ensure that it does not burn.

  • Remove from the heat and stir in the bicarbonate until it froths up, then pour into a well-buttered 25x18 centimetre (10x7 inch) shallow tin. Leave to cool completely.

  • Break the contents into small pieces by placing it all in a plastic bag and bashing with a rolling pin.

  • Soften the ice-cream very slightly by placing it on 'defrost' in the microwave for one minute.

  • Tip into a bowl and quickly mix in the hokey pokey.

  • Refreeze until needed.

Serves 8.

Please note: It is important when making the hokey pokey to stir often, otherwise the mixture will burn.

1An American Researcher reports: 'Maybe Pennsylvania is different than the rest of the world, but we have ice-cream shops, diners and restaurants all over the state serving 'real' milkshakes'.2Any flavour ice-cream and liqueur can be substituted.

Bookmark on your Personal Space


Entry

A574454

Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

Read a random Edited Entry


Written and Edited by

References

h2g2 Entries

Disclaimer

h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of the Not Panicking Ltd. Unlike Edited Entries, Entries have not been checked by an Editor. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more