Indiana University Food- how to
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
While there seem to be many food-eating options at Indiana University, it is all an illusion, unless you're a masochist. While the idea of putting a McDonald's in the basement of a dorm was generous in theory, the smell of grease permeates the elevators and stairwells. There are many unrecorded deaths due to the lining of the lungs being coated with grease. These poor souls made the mistake of living at the performance-oriented dorm, and contracted the layers of air-born grease by walking to class every morning. Even those people, who ate McDonald's every day before moving to the dorm, have been turned off the convenience.
(Also, more realistically and honestly than the story about greased lungs, the cases of food poisoning around here are growing at an alarming rate.)
The cafeterias are an alternative, but the all-you-can-eat ones are seven meal points (dollars to people residing in the real world), and the pay-per-item cafeterias are even more expensive. The cheapest way to get though a cafeteria is to buy the burger, load it with as many pickles as possible, and sneak as much pop as you can into the wrapper. That way, eating takes less time, and you don't have to pause (or pay for) a beverage.
Burgers are the best way to go, also because they are gauranteed to have stopped moving, and be hair-free by the time you unwrap it.
While Indiana University does have the biggest union, don't count on the burger king, pizza hut, sub place, or vegetarian "Kiva" to bail you out on your need for food that wasn't once part of the exhibit at the science building. While these are generally safe places to eat, they are open for less than two hours a day. while normal people can eat 11am-1pm, those of us who go to class, the oneswho aren't prepared to skip class in search of one good meal, are pretty much left to starve, withering away thinking of pizza, and pretending to do finite math.
Be forewarned upon entering, or spending time at this university, PACK A LUNCH.
(Also, more realistically and honestly than the story about greased lungs, the cases of food poisoning around here are growing at an alarming rate.)
The cafeterias are an alternative, but the all-you-can-eat ones are seven meal points (dollars to people residing in the real world), and the pay-per-item cafeterias are even more expensive. The cheapest way to get though a cafeteria is to buy the burger, load it with as many pickles as possible, and sneak as much pop as you can into the wrapper. That way, eating takes less time, and you don't have to pause (or pay for) a beverage.
Burgers are the best way to go, also because they are gauranteed to have stopped moving, and be hair-free by the time you unwrap it.
While Indiana University does have the biggest union, don't count on the burger king, pizza hut, sub place, or vegetarian "Kiva" to bail you out on your need for food that wasn't once part of the exhibit at the science building. While these are generally safe places to eat, they are open for less than two hours a day. while normal people can eat 11am-1pm, those of us who go to class, the oneswho aren't prepared to skip class in search of one good meal, are pretty much left to starve, withering away thinking of pizza, and pretending to do finite math.
Be forewarned upon entering, or spending time at this university, PACK A LUNCH.
