Arcturun Nightmare
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
Drink.
See also:
> Causes of Death
> Medical Emergencies
> Rust Removal
> Zippers
INGREDIENTS:
> 1mg Arcturun Crystals (well crushed)*
>*(Drain Cleaner can be substituted)
> 4ml Mercury (hg)
> 200ml Egg Nog
> 25ml 180 proof alcohol
> 2 Marshmallows
Fill marshmallows with 2ml Mercury each,
place in egg nog and alcohol mixture,
sprinkle with crystals.
SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN BY:
> Single-throated Lifeforms
> Librarians
> Anyone without IMMEDIATE access to Advanced Lifesupport Equipment
> Enya
SHOULD BE TAKEN BY:
> Baby Bug Blatter Beasts (for teething)
> Rock Bands
> Truly decent poets
> Lawyers
Possible Side Effects:
> Laryngitus
> Bleeding
> Hallucinations
> Nightmares
> Death
> Religious Conversion
> Fearlessness*
>*Fear of zippers
History:
Discovered accidently by a Radio Pollution Distributor during a particularly boring night.
He died sometime later.
Zaphod Beeblebrox made the drink popular with the League of Two-Headed Voters. His rally cry of "Keep your zipper away from me!" is one of the defining moments of his Presidency, and led to a five year ban on all pants and jackets with zippers.
Facts and Statistics:
92% of drinkers have become nuns, priests, or monks.
42% of drinkers are males
38% Females
20% Other
More than 3/4 of those who drink Arcturun Nightmares are fans of Ally McBeel.
If you drink a teaspoonfull you can hear zippers whispering.
See also:
> Causes of Death
> Medical Emergencies
> Rust Removal
> Zippers
INGREDIENTS:
> 1mg Arcturun Crystals (well crushed)*
>*(Drain Cleaner can be substituted)
> 4ml Mercury (hg)
> 200ml Egg Nog
> 25ml 180 proof alcohol
> 2 Marshmallows
Fill marshmallows with 2ml Mercury each,
place in egg nog and alcohol mixture,
sprinkle with crystals.
SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN BY:
> Single-throated Lifeforms
> Librarians
> Anyone without IMMEDIATE access to Advanced Lifesupport Equipment
> Enya
SHOULD BE TAKEN BY:
> Baby Bug Blatter Beasts (for teething)
> Rock Bands
> Truly decent poets
> Lawyers
Possible Side Effects:
> Laryngitus
> Bleeding
> Hallucinations
> Nightmares
> Death
> Religious Conversion
> Fearlessness*
>*Fear of zippers
History:
Discovered accidently by a Radio Pollution Distributor during a particularly boring night.
He died sometime later.
Zaphod Beeblebrox made the drink popular with the League of Two-Headed Voters. His rally cry of "Keep your zipper away from me!" is one of the defining moments of his Presidency, and led to a five year ban on all pants and jackets with zippers.
Facts and Statistics:
92% of drinkers have become nuns, priests, or monks.
42% of drinkers are males
38% Females
20% Other
More than 3/4 of those who drink Arcturun Nightmares are fans of Ally McBeel.
If you drink a teaspoonfull you can hear zippers whispering.
