Interview of a Manager (UG)

1 Conversation

Official UnderGuide Entry

“We should have realised a bit sooner

We should all hold up our hands and admit

That we should have spotted the omens

Like when Death and Pestilence gave up and quit

The hail of frogs, the plague of locusts

Was someone trying to send us a sign?

Mice threw themselves into traps, did we notice?

As this interviewee sat down to dine

Interview day wasn’t much better

Endless black rain hammering down

Did no-one else look out the window

To see the plague-ridden rats ship out of town?

The vampires took up sunbathing

The bogey-man fled out the door

Famine made a run for the border

Rapidly followed by War

All the birds stopped their singing

During this guy’s tour of the site

And was that a church bell I heard ringing

As the surprise eclipse blotted out all the light?

Dismissive and rude to the staff here

Talked complete drivel all day

Kept asking about the size of his office

And how much we were willing to pay

Clearly not a team player

Track record of persecuting the meek

And did anyone notice his T-shirt

With the slogan of “Trample the Weak”?

In summary, an outstanding candidate

Exactly the type of manager we need

This is quite a coup for the company

And so what if he can’t actually read.

Well done everyone, thanks for your input

Exactly the calibre of manager we seek

I’m sure he’ll feel right at home here

Could he start as soon as next week?”

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