HOW TO BE A VICTIM
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
HOW TO BE A VICTIM
THE VICTIM GAME
THE VICTIM IS A POPULAR PAST-TIME. THE AIM OF THE GAME IS TO AVOID RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF AT ALL COSTS.
CONVINCE YOURSELF THAT YOU ARE POWERLESS. BELIEVE YOU HAD NO CHOISE IN WHATS HAPPENING.
PLAY HELPLESS
TELL YOURSELF THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING YOU CAN DO. SCORE A POINT FOR EVERY TIME TOU SUCCEED IN CONVINCING SOMEOME.
FIND SOMEONE OR SOMETHING TO BLAME
ANYONE OR ANYTHING WILL DO. HERE ARE SOME POPULAR CHOISES.
a) BOSS
b) UPBRINGING (PARENTS ETC)
c) HUSBAND, WIFE OR LOVER.
d) BAD LUCK
e) ACCIDENTS
f) THE GOVERNMENT
g) GOD
COMPLAIN
PREFERBLY TO SOMEONE IN A POSITION NOT TO HELP. SCORE A POINT FOR EVERY TIME YOU GET THEM TO AGREE YOU HAVE BEEN HARD DONE BY. WHEN YOU HAVE MASTERED COMPLAINING, MOVE ON TO PERSISTANT COMPLAINING (OFTEN REFERED TO AS NAGGING OR MOANING) TO SCORE MORE POINTS.
VICTIM VOCABULARY
LEARN THESE OF BY HEART TO BE A CREDIBLE VICTIM:
a) HE, SHE, THEY, OR IT MADE ME
b) IF YOU HAVE HAD THE LIFE I HAVE
c)IF I HAD THE OPPORTUNITIES YOU HAVE HAD
d)NOBODY GIVES YOU NOTHING IN THIS LIFE
e)AFTER ALL I HAVE DONE FOR YOU
f)WITH MY LUCK I AM NOT SURPRISED
g)BUT IT IS AWFUL THE WAY PEOPLE
h)WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS
i) I SUPPOSE I WILL JUST HAVE TO PUT UP WITH IT
IMPORTANT
BE AS PESSIMISTIC AS YOU CAN.REMEMBER DELIVERY, TIME AND PLACE IS IMPORTANT. LOOK THE PART, SAD OR ANXIOUS, THE ODD SIGH MAY HELP.SCORE A POINT. FOR EVERY PERSON YOU BRING DOWN, ADD A BONUS IF THEY WERE IN A GOOD MOOD BEFORE YOU STARTED.
USEFUL STRATEGIES.
I AM FEELING A BIT DOWN TODAY
YOU MAY BE RIGHT BUT... ESSENTIAL THAT YOU MASTER THIS ONE, BECAUSE YOU MAY COME ACROSS SOMEONE WHO REALLY WANTS TO HELP.
YOU MUST REMEMBER ALL THE COUNTER ARUGMENTS.
YOU MUST BE A VIABLE VICTIM AT ALL TIMES.
EXITS
TO BE USED FOR ESCAPE IF VICTIM STRATEGIES ARE NOT WORKING. TIME YOUR EXIT FOR THE MOST DRAMATIC EFFECT, PERHAPS EXIT WITH A PUNCH LINE OR A HURT LOOK (HURT LOOK IS ESPECIALLY USEFUL IF WORDS ARE NOT WORKING)
IF EXIT IS NOT POSSIBLE YOU HAVE THREE OPTIONS
1. GET ANGRY
2. SULK
3. BURST INTO TEARS
WHEN YOU HAVE MASTERED THESE, MOVE ON TO THE ADVANCED GAME
BEING A MARTYR
ACCEPT BLAME, ABUSE OR DISCRIMINATION IN A PASSIVE WAY.THIS IS A LONG TERM STRATEGY AND PRIZES CAN NOT BE AWARDED TO WINNERS IN THIS LIFETIME.
MAKE OTHERS FEEL GUILTY AROUND YOU
A USEFUL PLOY IS TO ISOLATE YOURSELF AFTER HAVING ANNOUNCED TO EVERYONE YOUR INTENTIONS
FEEL GUILTY ABOUT YOURSELF
TRY FEELING GUILTY ABOUT YOURSELF FOR
1. BEING A BAD SPOUSE/LOVER/PARENT/SON/DAUGHTER/FRIEND
2. ANYTHING YOU DID IN THE PAST
3. ANYTHING YOU ARE THINKING AND FEELING NOW
4. BEING ALIVE
PUT YOURSELF DOWN AT REGULAR INTERVALS THROUGHOUT THE DAY, HOW AWFUL YOU ARE ETC.
IMPORTANT. MAKE SURE YOU KEEP AT IT AND DESTROY YOUR CONFIDENCE
WORRY YOURSELF SICK
ALWAYS HAVE CATASTROPHIC EXPECTATIONS OF THE FUTURE. DO NOT SEEK ADVICE, ESPECIALLY PROFESIONAL.
as much as i would like to take the credit,this artical was written by and is posted with the kind permission of my good friend Ken.
THE VICTIM GAME
THE VICTIM IS A POPULAR PAST-TIME. THE AIM OF THE GAME IS TO AVOID RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF AT ALL COSTS.
CONVINCE YOURSELF THAT YOU ARE POWERLESS. BELIEVE YOU HAD NO CHOISE IN WHATS HAPPENING.
PLAY HELPLESS
TELL YOURSELF THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING YOU CAN DO. SCORE A POINT FOR EVERY TIME TOU SUCCEED IN CONVINCING SOMEOME.
FIND SOMEONE OR SOMETHING TO BLAME
ANYONE OR ANYTHING WILL DO. HERE ARE SOME POPULAR CHOISES.
a) BOSS
b) UPBRINGING (PARENTS ETC)
c) HUSBAND, WIFE OR LOVER.
d) BAD LUCK
e) ACCIDENTS
f) THE GOVERNMENT
g) GOD
COMPLAIN
PREFERBLY TO SOMEONE IN A POSITION NOT TO HELP. SCORE A POINT FOR EVERY TIME YOU GET THEM TO AGREE YOU HAVE BEEN HARD DONE BY. WHEN YOU HAVE MASTERED COMPLAINING, MOVE ON TO PERSISTANT COMPLAINING (OFTEN REFERED TO AS NAGGING OR MOANING) TO SCORE MORE POINTS.
VICTIM VOCABULARY
LEARN THESE OF BY HEART TO BE A CREDIBLE VICTIM:
a) HE, SHE, THEY, OR IT MADE ME
b) IF YOU HAVE HAD THE LIFE I HAVE
c)IF I HAD THE OPPORTUNITIES YOU HAVE HAD
d)NOBODY GIVES YOU NOTHING IN THIS LIFE
e)AFTER ALL I HAVE DONE FOR YOU
f)WITH MY LUCK I AM NOT SURPRISED
g)BUT IT IS AWFUL THE WAY PEOPLE
h)WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS
i) I SUPPOSE I WILL JUST HAVE TO PUT UP WITH IT
IMPORTANT
BE AS PESSIMISTIC AS YOU CAN.REMEMBER DELIVERY, TIME AND PLACE IS IMPORTANT. LOOK THE PART, SAD OR ANXIOUS, THE ODD SIGH MAY HELP.SCORE A POINT. FOR EVERY PERSON YOU BRING DOWN, ADD A BONUS IF THEY WERE IN A GOOD MOOD BEFORE YOU STARTED.
USEFUL STRATEGIES.
I AM FEELING A BIT DOWN TODAY
YOU MAY BE RIGHT BUT... ESSENTIAL THAT YOU MASTER THIS ONE, BECAUSE YOU MAY COME ACROSS SOMEONE WHO REALLY WANTS TO HELP.
YOU MUST REMEMBER ALL THE COUNTER ARUGMENTS.
YOU MUST BE A VIABLE VICTIM AT ALL TIMES.
EXITS
TO BE USED FOR ESCAPE IF VICTIM STRATEGIES ARE NOT WORKING. TIME YOUR EXIT FOR THE MOST DRAMATIC EFFECT, PERHAPS EXIT WITH A PUNCH LINE OR A HURT LOOK (HURT LOOK IS ESPECIALLY USEFUL IF WORDS ARE NOT WORKING)
IF EXIT IS NOT POSSIBLE YOU HAVE THREE OPTIONS
1. GET ANGRY
2. SULK
3. BURST INTO TEARS
WHEN YOU HAVE MASTERED THESE, MOVE ON TO THE ADVANCED GAME
BEING A MARTYR
ACCEPT BLAME, ABUSE OR DISCRIMINATION IN A PASSIVE WAY.THIS IS A LONG TERM STRATEGY AND PRIZES CAN NOT BE AWARDED TO WINNERS IN THIS LIFETIME.
MAKE OTHERS FEEL GUILTY AROUND YOU
A USEFUL PLOY IS TO ISOLATE YOURSELF AFTER HAVING ANNOUNCED TO EVERYONE YOUR INTENTIONS
FEEL GUILTY ABOUT YOURSELF
TRY FEELING GUILTY ABOUT YOURSELF FOR
1. BEING A BAD SPOUSE/LOVER/PARENT/SON/DAUGHTER/FRIEND
2. ANYTHING YOU DID IN THE PAST
3. ANYTHING YOU ARE THINKING AND FEELING NOW
4. BEING ALIVE
PUT YOURSELF DOWN AT REGULAR INTERVALS THROUGHOUT THE DAY, HOW AWFUL YOU ARE ETC.
IMPORTANT. MAKE SURE YOU KEEP AT IT AND DESTROY YOUR CONFIDENCE
WORRY YOURSELF SICK
ALWAYS HAVE CATASTROPHIC EXPECTATIONS OF THE FUTURE. DO NOT SEEK ADVICE, ESPECIALLY PROFESIONAL.
as much as i would like to take the credit,this artical was written by and is posted with the kind permission of my good friend Ken.
