h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm sorry, but I'll have to put you right about this. You've borrowed a joke out of the Hitchhiker's Guide to make a cheap crack about this fascinating country.
Hopp Schweiz !!! (As they say round these parts.)

You're right, I've had the chance/privilege to live there for 7 years and these years and the people I met there rank amongst my best souvenirs
E schoene gruess vom Palmgloss, ex-basellaender
(Pity I forgot so much of the Mundart)

Ha! I lived there for almost 9 years, and I love the place. Do you know that they are actually more scientifically advanced than us Brits?!

Seeing as how every time I go back to Merry Olde England, it seems to me that more and more thinge are broken, vandalised or never worked in the first place, I can't take that as a compliment. At least in the early nineties, the UK used to be cheap. These days, you're expected to pay Swiss-level prices for the same s**t service.

God, I miss the place ...

Miss where? Switzerland?

No. England. Sausages, baked beans, curries, beer and the BBC help you to put up with a lot. Especially the beer. Why do Europeans only like lager?

Oh, England, sorry!
Yes, I'm quite partial to a bacon & egg sarnie with HP Sauce myself.
Could I just point out one little detail that I get frustrated about when people get it wrong? Well, we are Europeans, the continent is not a landmass, but an area, and Britain is part of it.
Sorry, just thought I'd point that out.

Fair point...
I should have said 'Continental Europe'. Also, I always feel a bit dubious when talking about my country of origin as 'England'. I am actually English, but as you know the vast majority of people over here don't appreciate the difference between England and Britain.

Regarding Swiss technology being the more advanced, I have to say that a major exception is Swisscom, my Net provider. Never has so little been provided for so much.

Yes, I know Swisscom. You know, it's funny to able to speak to someone who knows the same about CH as me!
But you have to admit that the idea of those electronic phonebooks and fax systems in the phone booths are quite useful, even if they don't work yet. What I meant by more technologically advanced was by having things like that, which we in England don't.

Actually, those electronic phone books in the call-boxes now work fine. You should also see the automatic ticket vending machines they have in the railway stations, and also the ultra high-tech passport photo machines, which show you a digital image of your photo, so you can check it before pressing 'PRINT'. Why didn't anyone think of that before?

One problem with the phone books in Switzerland, electronic or otherwise, is that, especially in rural areas, like the area of Central Switzerland I live in, you've got to know exactly in which village your 'target' lives before you can find him/her. Just knowing that they live, say, somewhere near Luzern, is not good enough. Seeing as how there are only 6 million people living here, it all seems a bit unnecessary. I mean, if you wnt to look up a phone number in London, you don't first have to know if the person lives in Notting Hill, Ealing, Brixton, etc.

Anyway, why don't they have these nice gadgets in public spaces in the UK? Is it because no-one can be bothered, or because no-one can afford it, or is it because they'd all be vandalised within six weeks?

Oh, the photo booths... yep, we have them in England too now. I know what you mean when you say that the electronic phonebooks would be vandalised immediatly over here. Ho hum.
Where do you live in central Switzerland anyway? Do you know of a village called Sigriswil?

I live in the pleasant village of Stansstad, which is in the Canton of Nidwalden. From the window of the room in which I'm now sitting I can see the 'famous' Mt. Pilatus.

I'm afraid I hadn't heard of Sigriswil, but I've just looked it up on the map. It appears to be in a lovely location; right on the side of the Thunersee, with a view of Eiger Mönch and Jungfrau. Am I right?

That's the one!!
It's great to be able to talk to someone who knows it1
Well, you don't, but someone who knows Switzerland...

Hi There,
Just startet h2g2 about 1 week ago. And what dose i find by searching the guide for "fasnacht" a person called FCL-BW (so you are a fan of FC Luzerne footballteam? but wahts the BW?) So you have to come to Basel on FASNACHT its very spezial. About beer, its geting more and more smal breweris in switzerland witch got different kinde of beer then the normal lager one. Also the homebrewing-scene is growing. Check out WWW.UNSER-BIER.CH (sorry all in german) About swisscom, what you can expect from a former monopolist of telecomunication.
But those phonecell with the nice little displays are quite graet, if you nowe wehre the person you search is living (Its free to search a phonenumber with this, if you call the Information it coasts you about sFr. 1.80)
So sorry for my bad english
See you
PS: Check out my entery about FASNACHT

Hi Dave,

Thanks for your message. Don't worry about your English; there are some mistakes but everybody can understand what you're trying to say. It's good that nationalities other than the British and the Amis are now joining the H2G2.

I have been to see the Basel Fasnacht, but I much prefer the Luzern version. The Basel version is probably more interesting if you're from the area and interested in politics and satire, but you must admit the Luzern version is more fun.

One area where Basel definitely beats Luzern is the beer. Here, we can only get Eichhof, which is very boring. My favourite Swiss beer is Ueli Beer, from Basel. And although Luzern attracts more tourists, I think the Old Town in Basel is actually more attractive; especially Klein Basel. But you should do something to clean up the Elisabethankirche; it's disgusting.

You're right about FCL - Hopp Lozärn!!!!. We're playing Basel tonight, but I've no desire to go, as some of the inhabitants of Basel aren't as friendly as you. By the way, B and W are my initials.

But what do you think about Monika Fasnacht?

Hi FCL-BW
So you like the Ueli Beer, but you now that sins November 1998 there is a new brewery in Basel called "Unser Bier". Check out the Homepage: http://www.unser-bier.ch There is also a club of howe-brewer with the same name doing some courses about homebrewing and the other things about beer. If you like to see almost every beer in switzerland you have to go to the Restarant "federal" in the Zuerich Hauptbahnhof, get of the train, wake strait ahed, in the big halle on the right site you find the "federal", there are servig about 140 diverent kinde of swissbeer, check it out. An the nice thing about this restaurant is you can fall after drinking direkt to your train an move home.
Okay about the fasnacht in luzern is more FUN, but i'm borne in basel and start my live with this kind of fasnacht so for my its the greats thing on earth or the univers?
About Monika Fasnacht do i now not match, becouse i am not a TV-watcher, musik is my live, like Frank Zappa sad: Music is the best.