Safe Bondage Play

If you are looking for something to spice up your sex life, and think a bit of light bondage might be what you are looking for, read on.

Bondage can be fun because if you are tied up, or instructed not to move, you temporarily give up the resonsibility for what happens to you. There might be something that you'd like to do, but you feel guilty, or that it's wrong, or maybe you are would just like your partner to take the lead. It can be very liberating to give the responsibility to someone else. If you are tying your partner up, then the feelings of power can be very stimulating, you can give your partner intense feelings of delight, and there is nothing they can do about it.

There are things you should know, in order to keep yourself, and your partner safe from harm.

Having a go

If you want to try bondage, start with something light and easy. Silk scarves, ribbons, or neckties are a good beginning. Don't use tights or stockings, as the knots will tighten, and can restrict the blood supply.

Keep scissors close by. They can be hidden from the person being tied up, which will encourage the feeling of helplessness, but they should be available at all times. Speed can sometimes be of the essence.

Make sure that you and your partner agree on what you will do, before you start. There's nothing less sexy than your partner doing something to you that you don't like.

Arrange a safeword, a word that can be used to stop anything that you don't like. That way you can say no, no, without worrying that your partner will stop. Something that would not normally be said in that situation will work best. For example, something like 'towerblock', or 'pedestrian' would be ideal. Another idea might be to use the traffic light system, red for 'stop now, before I call the police', yellow for 'well, I'm not really keen on that, but you can try something else', or green for 'don't stop!'. Don't be afraid to use the safeword, and remember that it can be used by either partner.

If you decide to use a gag, then another form of 'safeword' should be used. Although gags don't stop all noise, the gagged person should be given something top hold that is noisy. A bell to ring if they feel distressed is the best idea. A bunch of keys that can be dropped will make a noise, but it is possible that might go unnoticed.

Never put anything around the neck. Any pressure on the throat can cause unconsiouness quicker than you might think - the carotid arteries in the neck go straight to the brain.

Bondage isn't necessarily about pain. Tickle, massage, tease and tantalise.

A Final Word

Bondage is not abuse. During a bondage scene either partner can stop the activity at any time. The scene is consented to by both (or all) parties concerned, and the happiness of both parties is considered essential. Abuse cannot be stopped by request, and is not consented to.