1500¹ Event Horizon finds EV and fords causing trouble at Piccadilly station.

1600 Daleks are procured.

1700 In the Lass O'Gowrie the meet is ambushed, possibly by ZZ9ers - boo!

1702 First discussion of MJ Simpson being a git.

1703 MJ Simpson enters the pub. EV swings for him and is arrested.²

1710 Phil and Metal Chicken arrive, having bailed EV out.

1712 The intrepid researchers are overwhelmed by MJS' supporters and decamp to another table.

1742 Granny, Grandad and Croz arrive.

1745 What? No paper people?

1746 Croz volunteers to sculpt missing resarchers from Blu-Tak.

1753 fords loses an hour.

1758 MJ Simpson's ears must be burning!

1800 Discussion: wasn't MJ Simpson the bloke who killed his wife and was pursued by the cops in a low-speed car chase?

1812 Discussion of coloured chalk provokes vintage Rhodesian teacher anecdote.

1814 Croz refuses to sit with fords due to smell.

1817 Attention drifts towards football on TV. Tottenham Hotspur striker kicks West Bromwich Albion goalie's head off and dives for penalty.

1822 Tony Blair's parentage called into question. Michael Howard and Charles Kennedy similary smeared due to the impartial nature of the BBC.

1823 Lord Sutch for Prime Minister!

1824 Debate about post-death libel ensues. Lord Sutch implicated...

1825 ...but he was a great rock 'n' roller.³

1827 Pen used for writing log changes colour.

1840 As the Flat Caps organise a meet, the SRG laugh in the face of bureaucracy.

1841 Pegasus, Ovine Assassin, Jamie and Wumbeevil thrown together in a strange Blu-Tak orgy.

1900 Leave pub in search of curry.

1940 Oh no! The Blu-Tak people have been left behind!

1941 Oh well.

1943 Pingu brings conversation to a halt.

1944 First curry stain spotted.

1945 No urinal mats in toilet. Very disappointing.

2030 fords attempts to explain River City to the English.

2032 Fails.

2035 Where's the food?

2038 It is decided that nuns know too much, but they do make exceedingly good cakes.

2040 FOOD!

2115 Hitchhiker's film discussed. MJ Simpson blamed for bringing release date forward, spoiling SRG's plan for Towel Day meet.

2140 £160 for eight Vimto lollies! Still, the meal was free...

2206 Back at the Lass, it seems the Blu-Tak people have been kicked out for being drunk and disorderly. Too much Wet Willy, Granny reckons.

2207 Good beer, great company... shame about the Stereophonics.

2220 My Favourite Operations Part 2.

2235 Recorder based rock bands are the future!

2300 Time is called shockingly early, and various researchers disappear into the night.