h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*ducks into kitchen* Minoova, make sure Springie gets some greens, no donut, if she asks for food. Kibble and mbougatsis for Styx. Keep fresh coffee going, and don't let anyody in the studio. I have a major amount to accomplish today.

*grabs pastry and coffee and goes into studio*

*Diogenes finally comes in from the veranda. Wanders idly for a while, pausing in front of the fireplace -- but instead of stopping and napping, trots off to the guest rooms*

*out on the veranda: Titania is yawning and stretching, and a bit shocked at discovering it's evening - again!*

Good heavens, how long have I been asleep?!

*looking around, realising she's all alone, walks into the kitchen*

Hi Odra, Di, Styx!
Oooh, fresh mbougatses, yummie!
Minoova, could I have a cup of tea, please!
Minoova: oui, ma reine

*Wanders in snickering.*

Hey Lil, you won't believe this. Amy the Ant wandered in here yesterday on the ELECTRICAL system. Man, it's a good thing I had the security system set to inform-only. I watched her come and go - she left a card, by the way. Did you see it? Anyway, if you want to see the tapes, it's quite amusing.

Odra - Barsoom comes from Edgar Rice Burrough's Mars serries. I read all of them about 3 years ago. It's a whole different type of writing - very spare and straight ahead, but the stories are engaging and there is almost non-stop action. I enjoyed them all, but the first 3 form a trilogy and you can stop there - the rest (I think there are 11 or so total) are sequels and not quite as good as the originals.

And Odra, I'm glad to see that the schools haven't killed your innate curiousity and love of learning. That's what they do to most people. The problem with the school system is ... well, there are lots. Firstly, they are mandatory - you can't force someone to learn against their will. Which means they are useless for learning purposes - any learning that happens there happens in spite of the system, not because of it. Secondly, it fosters the idea that learning is a separate activity from the rest of life - that to learn something you have to learn it FROM a TEACHER in a SCHOOL. That's crap. You can't do anything in life without learning something. And who's to say that their interpretation of what goes on around us is better than your first-hand experience? Thirdly, life isn't divided up into subjects like geography and history and science - they are all interconnected, yet schools treat them this way as if there were no other way. One of the biggest problems with schools is that they instill in us the worship of experts. We don't trust our own observations and experience as a guide to figuring out the world - we think there is always someone out there who knows the answer. But it's not true. You are the person that knows what is best for you and often there IS no right answer.

I could go on and on, but you would be better of reading "Instead of Education" by John Holt. Your library should have it (that's where I read it) and it is well worth reading. Don't let the school system's ranking of you affect your own evaluation of your self-worth. It's obvious you are a bright person - it is the ranking that is the problem. It's just a shame that you need the right college ticket to get into the job you want. (Or do you? Lil took the independant route and did fine. Can you take time off between high school and college? Investigate where you want to take your life. To England for a 15 year sojourne, maybe ). Did you have a particular career in mind?

Wow, there really has been a LOT of conversation going on after I dozed off, took me quite some time getting here...

*practically staggers out of studio*
WOW! I feel like an explorer on an unknown continent. No that's not right. I feel like, like, I 'm the first person to set eyes on a statue in the jungle in 500 years. Man, wait till those Kidologists see this stuff.

Hi everybody! What I need is to carbo-load, feed my brain. Springie, you OK? *reaches down to stroke the snoozing unau* Hello, Dio...

Yes, Garius, I saw the card not long after it was left yesterday. I didn't know why she took the wires here, but I thought maybe that's just more comfortable for ants. Still, CLI wiring is not the safest form of travel....

Hard to say what all Odra and I didn't talk about last night. Or where we didn't talk. If you follow my meaning.

*goes into kitchen* Let's get a stew into the oven for later. *gets chunk beef, potatoes, onions, carrots turnips etc. out of fridge & pantry*

Reminds me, time Violet had some meat. *goes out onto Veranda with a small chunk* Enjoying the outdoor life dear? *places meat in open plantmouth*
*mouth snaps shut and Violet curtseys*

Right, if the stew goes in in 30 minutes it'll be well and truly ready at 9. *grabs tea and a slice of mbougatses* I'm back to work. See you later!

By, all! Got to go...

*drifting off, in her usual v.e.l.manner*

*Mmmm that stew smells good. Adds a extremely generous splash of red wine. That should enhance the flavour*

Thinks. I suppose should add the rest of the wine to myself. Sip. Not bad.

I need a life... or a rather large sum of money.

Try dying your hair. It seems to work for women

Greetings, gentlemen.

Dyeing your hair is just a diversionary tactic. Doesn't actually solve the problem. (I'm speaking from experience here.)

What's up, Sporky?

*Helps herself to champagne from that wondrous bottle in the fridge*

*emerges from studio looking exultant*
A few metal studs on a sash are going to set the kidologists on their ears. We all have to completely change our minds about his dress habits.

*goes into kitchen* Oh man, wine in the stew! *adds a little more thyme*

I think some champagne and let's see *rootle rootle* cheese!
*slices some and comes into salon*

I'll do more work yet tonight, but I need a break.

A productive day for you, Lil?

*upon hearing the uncorking of a certain champagne bottle, emerges from room at long last and meanders in, Diogenes in tow, wading through the backlog on her way in*

'Morning...well, it -has- to be morning somewhere or other...

So that's where Barsoom comes from.
Hmm.
Tell me, did it in the story have something to do with the planet Mars? Was it a city there, or some sort of port town along one of the now-known-to-be-dry canals? l can't ever remember reading a book about it, but l seem to recall it from somewhere...

It was your original sword and sorcery stuff, if you overlook Morte d'Arthur. I can't remember a word of it, but I read The Moons of Barsoom ages and ages ago. Such a sonorous word, Barsoom.

Shall I make some garlic bread to go with the stew? Sorry if I seem disjointed. I have spent most of the day in Nowheresville, Outer Old West, 1878, where if you want something to eat you have to grow it or catch it first. I've been going on about it entirely too much and apologise, but the thing is in my head and it won't leave till I'm done.

*goes back into kitchen to make garlic butter and slice baguettes*

Barsoom is vaguely familiar to me, too. I just did a quick search on Amazon.com, and in addition to E R Burroughs, found a book by Larry Nivens called The Barsoom Project, about an amusement park. Don't know anything about it, but sounded appropriate as you put Bahb in that room, Lil.

*refills champagne glass, tops off Odra's glass, too*

Want some champagne, Lil?

Yes please!
*wraps buttered french loaves in foil and sticks them in oven to warm as she removes stew from oven*

Odra can you eat yet? These veggies will be done to death and the meat's fork tender.
Minoova, get out the pasta bowls and knives and spoons. Nobody will need forks.

Thanks, Witty.

*sips reflectively*
l have a copy of Cosmos around here somewhere. l think that's where l heard it...l think Sagan references it somewhere. ln conjunction with the original Burrough's series, l believe.
Now where did that book get to, l wonder?
*decides to find it later, sips again*

Well, it'll be an interesting experiment, let's say, Lil. l'd love to try some, though. Looks excellent.

And if not, well, l'll polish off this wine Loony opened...

Here you go, Lil--------------- Y

Boy, does that smell good!