Surfing
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
Surfing is the artform/sport of riding a wave, on any of a number of bouyant, steamlined boards of varying materials, to no flotation device of any kind. Can be performed on any stretch of coast that allows for an angle approach to the beach by the wave. Comes in the following variations: bodysurfing, bodyboarding, longboarding, shortboard surfing, and long boarding. Okay, enough of the dry stuff about a very wet activity.
First off, surfing first originated in the society Islands thousands of years ago, was the first thing Capt. Cook(KOOK!!!)noticed when he bumped into Hawaii, and is the single most intense thing you can do on a regular basis, besides sex. Now,I know Bungee and Base jumpers will disagree about that last point, but lets face it, unless you operate a business catering to those activities, you can't do it everyday.
Anyway, all you need to learn surfing is a board, some surf wax, a beach, some patience,and a high tolerance for water entering various body cavities when you least expect it. Besides the aforementioned enema, there are other maladies to contend with, such as reef-rash, fin-gashes, nipple scabs, surfer's knots and a host of others.
Common encounters with nature include hungry sharks, stinging jellyfish, amourous seals, sea lions that are just plain old rude, and dolphins who love to tell you how much you suck by showing off. They are the second most intelligent after all, while we are third, friggin' mice with their experiments.
All of which the common surfer gladly suffers, because it is just way too b**tchin too describe here.
Some preferred places to learn are Florida, California, and of course Waikiki Beach, Hawaii. If you chose the last, you can take lessons from the beach boyz working the cabanas for a fee. They guarantee that you'll learn to stand up by the end pof the class, of your money back. Or you can learn it the hard way, like yours truly did fifteen years ago, on your own with the occasional tidbit of help from your buddies, and invest what is at present over half of my lifetime, and by richly rewarded by the brushes with nature, the scars from the injuries, and all the memories that go with them. Boy, did that sound trite or what?
As an interesting side note,surfing, once known as the sport of kings, was re-introduced to the world after the Missionary invasion of Hawaii subsided, at Waikiki. So anyone learning to surf in Waikiki, will be doing so in the place of surfing's resurrection. Kinda of a neat symetry, dontya think?
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