The Capybara, or Mome Rath (Hydrochoerus hydrochaeris, Class Mammalia, Order Rodentia, Family Hydrochoeridae, Genus species), is the world's largest living rodent.¹ They can be found, if you are unlucky, in highly vegetated South American and Panamanian swamps or near similar water such as ponds, lakes, and rivers.

Their massive bodies are covered in a thin coat of brown or red (but not too thin, just enough not to be called thick), yellowed underbellies, and tough skin. Their eyes are beady and look like they know something that they really wouldn't like you to know and have no intention of letting slip.² Their ears are smallish and set near to the top of their rectangular head, as are the nostrils (except on different ends). The feet are webbed and clawed and set on short, stubby legs. It is, as already stated, the largest living rodent. This fact is restated to drive the point home. Common body length varies between 42 and 53 inches in height and between 20 and 24 inches at shoulder; the weight of male is 77 to 140 pounds, and slightly more in the female (80 to 145 pounds) due to over eating brought on by the knowledge of how bad off she is with such a homely mate.³

It is the only species in its genus, which belongs to the family Hydrochoeridae (order Rodentia) and therefore has a hell of a time making friends, which as time goes on becomes more and more important begin that they teeter on and off of the endangered species list.⁴

If there were one word to describe the Mome Rath upon observation, it would most likely be something along the lines of a high pitched scream, followed by some running and a leap behind rock. This all would be futile and pointless and would make the observer look rather silly to anyone watching him or her. The Mome Rath is in fact a herbivore, feeding primarily on grasses that grow in or near the water and water plants (such as melons and squash), and therefore would not even think of eating an observer unless that observer were disguised as a bunch of grasses or water plants (such as melons and squash).

They are wholly frightening creatures, but not for any good reason. That is because the reason they are frightening is not very good. They are mostly harmless and would be quite happy basking and mating in lily-pad littered pools all day long and would do just that had if they had the ability.⁵

Their natural span is between 8 and 10 years (although hunting reduces this to about 4 years). Most of this time is spent basking and mating in lily-pad littered pools and resting up to do it all again the next day.

Their social structure is rather unremarkable. Each group has a dominant male with at least one to several depressed female mates plus young and subordinate males. They communicate in a manner similar to many pre-adult human males: with whistles and barks plus scent from glandular secretions.

Stay away from these creatures at all costs.