Situated in the South of England¹ this city has everything that every modern cosmopolitan city must have….and more²

With the recent (1999) pedestrianisation³ of the city center the road system has become much more than a route of travel around the city. The road system if viewed from the air (your best bet if you want to get to work on time), now actually spells out "Reginald"⁴. This is the name of the "genius" egomaniac who came up with the fabulous idea.

But as stated above,Oxford is much more than just a roller coaster ride of emotions that is the driving experience in and around Oxford, yes I write of the parking adventure. Of course the faint-hearted driver can park in the provided parking lots of the city (dependant on arrival at about 6am and an average weekly expenditure of £40) but the adventurous fellow will laugh disparagingly at that idea and plunge headlights first into the parking frenzy.

For the pedestrian there is a great deal of entertainment to be had sitting in one of the many pubs, nursing a ridiculously priced beer, with their pals and have a giggle at the vain attempt of the parkee⁵ to squeeze the 12ft car into a 10ft gap.

Now the pubs….ah yes..the pubs. There are currently 98..no 101..no 110 no 111 etc………. pubs in Oxford and rising. Pub jobs seem to be the local industry and almost all the regular residents and students in Oxford work in one and drink in all of the other pubs. Some are very good fun if a little optimistically expensive. Still you can't have everything!⁶

The Universities are another feature of Oxford that cannot be overlooked if one is to fully appreciate the Oxford experience. There are two. One a former polytechnic and the other the world-renowned seat of learning. Now there are two types of student in Oxford. They appear in various quantities in both establishments.

1. The upper class, can't tie their own laces unsupervised, plum in the mouth, cocaine sniffing, unemployed, dad's got a Porsche delinquents and

2. Those who would like to be number ones!

Now, the students will be found in lectures if… it's term time AND it's raining AND their mates are in lectures AND all the pubs are closed AND there is nothing better to do AND they can be arsed to get out of bed. So it is possible for the sharp-eyed tourist in the city to spot one.

Tourists….oh ho…a few of those around. Easily spotted with their Olympus™ Ultra Heavy and Needlessly Complicated Camera® and light meter wandering around and blundering in to all and sundry as they make their way up the street with eyes on the buildings around them. Still they do bring in some cash to the economy…I suppose.

All in all you could say that Oxford has something for everyone.⁷