I Wish I Hadn't Said That!
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
| So Long And Thanks For Laughing |
Quotes from real people:
Politics:
No woman in my time will be Prime Minister.
Tory MP Margaret Thatcher, 1969. She became Prime Minister in 1979.
Churchill? He is a busted flush.
Lord Beaverbrook in 1932, explaining why he would not give the man a job on his newspaper. Ten years later, Winston Churchill was Prime Minister, and Beaverbrook's boss.
My uncle is a peaceful man. He thinks war's not worth the candle.
Willie Hitler, speaking about his uncle Adolf, 1937.
Science:
X-rays are a hoax.
Lord Kelvin, president of the Royal Society, 1900.
Man will not fly for 50 years.
Wilbur Wright to his brother Orville, in 1901. In 1903, Wilbur and Orville flew.
Space Travel is utter bilge.
Dr Richard Wooley, Astronomer Royal, 1956. The first Sputnik was launched in 1957.
Inventions:
The telephone is an amazing invention, but who would ever want to use one of them?
American President Rutherford Hayes, 1876.
Edison's electric lightbulb is good enough for our transatlantic friends, but unworthy of the attentions of practical or scientific men.
British Parliamentary Committee set up to investigate electric lighting, 1878.
Computers:
There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in their home.
Ken Olsen, head of office computer firm DEC, 1977.
We don't need you. You haven't gone through college yet.
Hewlett-Packard executive, rejecting Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniack and their new Apple Personal Computer. They went it alone, and are now millionaires.
Nuclear Power:
There is not the slightest indication that nuclear power will ever be obtainable.
Albert Einstein, 1932.
The energy produced by the atom is a very poor thing. Anyone who expects a source of power from it is talking moonshine.
Lord Rutherford, first man to split the atom.
Nuclear-powered vacuum cleaners will be a reality within ten years.
Alex Lewyt, vacuum cleaner manufacturer, 1955.
This is the biggest fool thing we have ever done. The bomb will never go off, and I speak as an expert in explosives.
Admiral William Daniel Leahy, three weeks before Hiroshima.
Transport:
I cannot imagine any condition which would cause a ship to founder. Modern shipbuilding has gone beyond that.
Edward Smith, Captain of the "Titanic", 1912.
Rail travel at high speed is not possible because passengers, unable to breath, would die of asphyxia.
Dr. Dionysus Lardner, of University College London, 1830.
What, Sir? Would you make a ship sail against the wind by lighting a bonfire under its deck? I pray you excuse me. I have no time for such nonsense.
Napoleon to Robert Fulton, inventor of the steamship, 1805 - the year of the Battle of Trafalgar.
The horse is here to stay, but the automobile is only a novelty, a fad.
Bank president advising against investing in Ford, 1903.
In less than 25 years the motorcar will be obsolete, because the aeroplane will run along the ground as well.
Sir Philip Gibbs, science journalist, 1928.
Warfare:
The machine-gun is a grossly over-rated weapon.
Field-Marshal Sir Douglas Haig, 1914, as a war dominated by machine-guns started.
The idea that cavalry will be replaced by these iron coaches is absurd. It is little short of treasonous.
British officer watching a tank demonstration in 1916.
Submarines might blockade British ports and bring us close to starvation? Most improbable, and more like one of Jules Verne's stories.
Admiral Sir Compton Domvile, June 1914, just before submarines blockaded British ports.
Music:
The rest of the group is fine, but the singer (Mick Jagger) will have to go.
Eric Easton, 1961, taking over as manager of the Rolling Stones.
We don't like their sound. Groups of guitars are on the way out.
Mike Smith, Decca A&R manager, turning down The Beatles, 1962.
You ain't goin' nowhere, son. You oughta go back to drivin' a truck.
Jim Denny of the Grand Ole Opry, Nashville, Tennessee, firing Elvis in 1954 after just one performance.
Far too noisy, my dear Mozart. Far too many notes.
Emperor Ferdinand of Austria, about "The Marriage of Figaro".
Bach's compositions are deprived of beauty, of harmony and of clarity of melody.
Johann Schiebe, music critic, 1737.
Literature:
I am sorry, Mr Kipling, but you just don't know how to use the English Language.
Editor of the San Francisco Examiner, rejecting a short story.
In "Wuthering Heights", all the faults of "Jane Eyre" are magnified a thousand fold, and the only consolation is that it will never be generally read.
North British Review, 1849.
Film:
You had better learn secretarial work or else get married.
The Blue Book Modelling Agency in 1944 to a very disappointed Miss Marilyn Monroe.
Who the Hell wants to hear actors talk?
President of Warner Brothers rejecting the idea of moving into talking pictures, 1927.
Forget it Louis. No Civil War film ever made a nickel.
Irving Thalberg of MGM, telling Louis B. Meyer not to bid for "Gone With The Wind".
Fred Astair: can't act. Can't sing. Balding.. Can dance a little.
MGM Talent scout, 1928.
Mr Reynolds, you have no talent. Mr Eastwood, you have a chip on your tooth, your adams apple sticks out too far, and you talk too slow.
A Universal Pictures boss dismissing Burt and Clint at the same interview in 1959.
What can you do with a guy with ears like that?
Jack Warner, rejecting Clark Gable, 1930.
| So Long And Thanks For Laughing |
