The following events took place in Edinburgh on May 12th 2007. As usual the log contains much that is apocryphal, or at least wildly inaccurate.

1340 EV and fords arrive at Waverley Station. Ku'Reshtin already there eating cookies.

1345 Roymondo arrives looking English.

1405 The Waverley 4 arrive at the Standing Order to find Not Him and Zagreb at table 43. Boo!

1406 Table 42 is procured to make table 85.

1425 SWL arrives and is inducted.

1446 Jamie turns up.

1448 Roymondo gives in to temptation.

1452 Bluejacking commences.

1504 Not Him goes to bar and back while Roymondo is still writing down everyone else's drink orders.

1506 Ringtone round-up.

1520 Toast to absinthe friends.

1540 Roymondo dedicates drink to his mate CUP.

1542 Politics breaks out.

1554 Roymondo asks SWL to pour some sugar on him.

1557 EV and Roymondo have a dirty little secret.

1558 fords complains that she hasn't drunk for 9 months and is drinking, while Roymondo and SWL are on coffee.

1601 Ku'Reshtin admits to being a fat bastard. fords wants to be a bastard too.

1609 Su Pollard turned Roymondo gay.

1614 Su Pollard is Roymondo's dad.

1615 Not Him wants to know what libellous comments about him are written down.

1615.30 None.

1617 Roymondo is gay!

1618 Girls Aloud sing the hits of The Jam.

1620 Roymondo fancies Keith Richards by proxy.

1621 Roymondo and SWL traumatised by sleepy kitten.

1626 Roymondo is served a pink drink and takes umbrage.

1634 Jamie gets a mention. Ku'Reshtin decides to strangle Not Him for no reason whatsoever. Roymondo goes off to find fags (Don't tell anyone!).

1635 fords would like to point out that it's of the smoking variety.

1636 You dirty buggers!

1642 h2g2 browsed on mobiles.

1643 Politics done.

1649 £10 grapes. (Ask Ku')

1650 Roymondo would prefer fords to look like Brad Pitt rather than Kate Moss.

1653 Oh no! The log is wet!

1704 EV suggests listening to the Smurfs at work.

1717 The poof juice has gone to Roymondo's head.

1730 Roymondo challenges fords on the quality of their farts. Dried fruit works for Roy.

1733 Roymondo is challenged to do an Eggy.

1737 SWL went to Blairgowrie and had a whitey.

1740 Roymondo gives Zagreb his number.

1747 Not Him sucks.

1747 fords puts foot in it big time.

1747 Roymondo threatens to use his civil servant powers on the group. Nobody cares. Insults Ku'.

1747.10 Apologises to Ku' for calling him a "lard arse".

1746 Ku'Reshtin's eyes don't bend that way.