h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Cambridge University Botanic Garden - A22124413
Author: cambridgecarnivorous - U7078493

About Cambridge Botanic Gardens

Hi cambridgecarnivorous

So I can read your Entry, could you possibly remove the tags?

Thanks

Galaxy Babe
Scout

done it

That's great
Could you possibly link to A724231 - I'll review your Entry tomorrow, it's way past my bedtime now

Just added little bit more information about entrance fee

You have alot of words capitalised when they should be in lower case.
Example: The original Garden = The original garden. Garden should'nt be in capital letters every time you mention it.

I hope you don't mind, i've spotted one or two little typos and stuff
You wrote:
The Original Garden was that off Trumpington street and contains the first Systematic Beds (an Original feature). The First Glasshouses where added in 1888

It could flow better this way,just a suggestion nothing more.
The original garden was off Trumpington Street and contains the first systematic flower beds, this is an original feature. The first glasshouses were erected in 1888

Hi there cambridgecarnivorous

A few points about formatting:

Remove the and tags from around the 'History' heading
Remove the tags where these are used as paragraph breaks and instead put at the beginning, and at the end of each paragraph

Typos:

was started by Henslsow >> Henslow
1960's >> 1960s
suggest you remove the 'it is'
collection of different species: - in the main garden >> collection of different species; in the main garden
Bateman street gate >> Bateman Street gate
donatored >> donated?
consites >> consists
consesions >> concessions
Full stop missing at the end of the sentence
Hills road >> Hills Road
station road entrance >> Station Road entrance
Trumpington road >> Trumpington Road
On street car parking >> On-street car parking

I am confused by your use of capitalisation:

Oldest Botanical collections
Systematic Beds (an Original feature)
The First Glasshouses
1931/34 Glasshouses
The teak Glasshouses
the new Glasshouses are
Park and Ride - in one place you capitalise this and in another you don't. I think the capitalised version is correct

Could you have a look at the capitalisation again please.

The section describing the new greenhouses has a mixture of present and future tense. Also, it might look better if the list of greenhousea were done as a bulleted list, using the GuideML ... tags,possibly with the greenhouse names in italics.

You need to mention somewhere, possibly as a footnote, that the entrance fees quoted are at 2007 prices (assuming they are).

A useful contribution that needs a little tidying up.

simulpost Venus

You forgot to mention which train station is closest to the gardens.
Also wall nut = walnut.
There are more typos, but i don't have time to list them for you now.
This is a great entry by the way, well done.

Aha, two minds think alike eh!

Hi cambridgecarnivorous, this is a great entry, and hopefully you'll be back soon to do some of the suggested changes (those capitals are really weird!).

You might want to rethink including the prices - as they change, the entry may become out of date. You could say 'a small charge', because £3 is pretty small these days!

Just made a few key changes and califications

I see you still havent altered all the capital letters that should'nt be capitals, or corrected any of the spelling errors. Is this something you are working on?

I've added varous things - everything now has the right context

When you look at your Entry, you see large gaps around the headings and the individual paragraphs. These are caused by the tags you have used. Most, if not all, of them should be removed. The and tags will take care of the paragraph breaks. Also, remove the and tags from around the 'History' heading.

where >> were

Why is Glasshouse Range capitalised? I see no reason for it.

Henslsow >> Henslow

replace the comma by semi-colon

>adopted in various forms by other gardens, this garden is still unique> replace the comma by semi-colon

large collection of different species: - in the main garden... >> large collection of different species. In the main garden...

delete 'Other' and capitalise 'less'

under planted >> under-planted

What do you mean by 'understory'?

replace comma by full-stop, and capitalise the following word

Double use of 'display'. Could you reword this?

replace colon by semi-colon

After the next 6 paragraphs would look better as bullet points. Here's how to do this:

Continents Apart...
Oceanic Islands...
Alpine House...
Wet Tropics..
Carnivorous Plant House...
Desert House


There are other thing that need addressing, but I suggest you deal with these first.

This Entry will come out right in the end

Thanks - understory means the bottom layer of a forest or woodland.
I have used captals for Glasshouse Range becasue that is what the Botanical gardens call it: also becasue it is the name of the particular type of glasshouse structure

fine, understood.

Those bullet points look much better now don't you think? They could be improved even further if they used a consistent style. For example:

Continents Apart: looking at...
Oceanic Islands: looking at...
Alpine House: illustrating...

and so on.

There are a couple of things about dates in h2g2. House Style requires your dates to be in the form '23 December' and '2 January'. Although it obviously doesn't apply here, if the date had a year as well, it would be in the form '12 September, 2007'.

'free' should not have a capital.

The 'How to Get There' heading has a couple of those tags that need removing. While there, how about putting those two entrances you give as bullet points as well, just like the greenhouse details list. You can use exactly the same tags as have there.

Another House Style thingy, footnotes should each end with a full-stop.

I look forward to seeing this again when you've got these changes done

Thanks: just made changes + making footnotes clearer - If people come wanting to see a particular glasshouse and it is closed they will not thank us

This is an excellent Entry about the gardens. It needs some tidying, but should have no problem being picked for the Edited Guide.

Tidying:

some 10,000 labelled plants of which there are 9 national collections -- I presume you meant to say:

some 10,000 labelled plants which include 9 national collections. Even then, it might deserve a footnote explaining what a national collection is.

9 national collections --> nine national collections

"The present gardens were founded ... and was opened ..." -- that should be "were opened"

You say the collection of trees is growing, but this is rather ambiguous. Can you think of another way of saying it?

"In the 1960s the rest of the garden was opened up, the gardens in this area include the famous and colourful winter garden opened in 1976" -- this is two sentences stuck together with a comma


"The Systematics Beds are an original feature designed by Henslow. It is made up of 144 island beds " -- you're mixing plural and singular here

this garden is still unique -- this is a separate sentence which is tacked onto the previous one using a comma

The tree collection includes a large collection of different species -->
The tree collection includes many different species

Other less important but no less beautiful is the Black Walnut -->
Less important but no less beautiful is the Black Walnut

Bateman street gate --> Bateman Street gate

under planted with bulbs --> underplanted with bulbs

It is made up of paths snaking though glades -- the garden is not made up of paths, these are just one of the things in the garden. Say this a different way.

colourful from December and April --> colourful from December to April

sandstone. -- move the full stop to before the because it looks really strange at the moment.

The teak Glasshouse Range has just been restored to their former glory -->
The teak Glasshouse Range has just been restored to its former glory

botanical illustrator Georita Harriott -- add a full stop after the

except the 23 December to 2 January --> except 23 December to 2 January

If you think that looks clumsy, you could try

except the period of 23 December to 2 January

there is no entrance fee. The Entrance fee is £3 -->
there is no entrance fee. At all other times, the entrance fee is £3

On street car parking --> On-street car parking