High School: Survival In
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
There are several rules to surviving life in high school that this researcher has observed, they may be applicable in other areas, they may just be the product of the single test subject used.
But here they are
Rule 1: Never show any signs of an exceptional intelect, others will just want to exploit you to raise their GPAs and make themselves look good to their parents
Rule 2: Only wear whatever brand of clothes is "in" at the moment (note, the local taste may change from as rarely as a month, to as frequently as a class period). All "in" fashions have two thing in common, costing about 20 times as much as they cost to be made, and about 15 times what they SHOULD be sold for, and all let the wearer serve as an organic advertisement for the brand.
Rule 3 (applies only to girls): You must have a bizarre, inexplicable obsession with a cartoon character meant for people half your age.
Rule 4: If you have a high GPA, you must complain that you didn't get higher, even if a higher GPA is not possible according to the grading system of the school.
Rule 5: If you have a low GPA, you must laugh whenever you tell anyone else what you got as to seem as if that is what you wanted.
Rule 6 (for under-classmen): Hobnob as much as possible with upper-classmen.
Rule 7 (for upper-classmen): Avoid associating with under-classmen as if they were the plague.
Rule 8: Watch the primetime television shows designed specifically for teenagers, no matter how stupid or unrealistic the shows may seem. They will probably be the subject of many discussions during the school day.
Follow these rules and you may actually survive through high school without becoming subject to ridicule.
But here they are
Rule 1: Never show any signs of an exceptional intelect, others will just want to exploit you to raise their GPAs and make themselves look good to their parents
Rule 2: Only wear whatever brand of clothes is "in" at the moment (note, the local taste may change from as rarely as a month, to as frequently as a class period). All "in" fashions have two thing in common, costing about 20 times as much as they cost to be made, and about 15 times what they SHOULD be sold for, and all let the wearer serve as an organic advertisement for the brand.
Rule 3 (applies only to girls): You must have a bizarre, inexplicable obsession with a cartoon character meant for people half your age.
Rule 4: If you have a high GPA, you must complain that you didn't get higher, even if a higher GPA is not possible according to the grading system of the school.
Rule 5: If you have a low GPA, you must laugh whenever you tell anyone else what you got as to seem as if that is what you wanted.
Rule 6 (for under-classmen): Hobnob as much as possible with upper-classmen.
Rule 7 (for upper-classmen): Avoid associating with under-classmen as if they were the plague.
Rule 8: Watch the primetime television shows designed specifically for teenagers, no matter how stupid or unrealistic the shows may seem. They will probably be the subject of many discussions during the school day.
Follow these rules and you may actually survive through high school without becoming subject to ridicule.
