Pop: What went wrong?
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
First, let me start this off by saying:
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"
The above statement represents my opinion and interest level
in the world of pop music today. Raise your hand if you are male and
enjoy the pre-fab croonings of such "bands" as the Backstreet Boys,
NSYNC, or 98(Ninety-Eight) degrees..............(crickets).......I
thought so. Plus, contrary to popular belief, guys are NOT "Just
jealous". Personally, I'm just sick of hearing these boy bands have
to SING(worthless songs, no less) when in fact they would suit the
same function they are used for now if they were mute(This function
being to induce masses of teenage girls to fits of hysteria so we can
release them as soldiers under the leadership of the Backstreet Boys
just in case WWIII rolls around). Lucky for us, there's always
Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and any future wonderful midriff-baring
hotties. Eventually there'll be bigger and bigger, more and more
attractive pop singers until eventually they'll all explode and the
janitors have to clean up the mess and start all over.
My top 10 reasons NOT to like the Backstreet Boys:
10. They suck
9. They dont write their own music
8. They were taken off the street for their looks, TAUGHT how to sing and dance, and then thrown into the spotlight
7. They suck
6. You've got these guys, NSYNC, AND 98 degrees. How many do you need?
5. They blow
4. What if I said they were all gay?
3. What if I'm right?
2. They suck
1. See reasons 10, 7, and 2
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway,
Has anyone else noticed that the biggest fans of the song
"Pretty Fly(for a White Guy)" are 1.) not Offspring fans at all, and
2.) The subject of the song? But that's a subject for another day,
and another ranting session. Until then, I'm Adam Carolla for Dr.
Drew and Diane Farr saying, "If you're happy and you know it, I hate
you."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"
The above statement represents my opinion and interest level
in the world of pop music today. Raise your hand if you are male and
enjoy the pre-fab croonings of such "bands" as the Backstreet Boys,
NSYNC, or 98(Ninety-Eight) degrees..............(crickets).......I
thought so. Plus, contrary to popular belief, guys are NOT "Just
jealous". Personally, I'm just sick of hearing these boy bands have
to SING(worthless songs, no less) when in fact they would suit the
same function they are used for now if they were mute(This function
being to induce masses of teenage girls to fits of hysteria so we can
release them as soldiers under the leadership of the Backstreet Boys
just in case WWIII rolls around). Lucky for us, there's always
Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and any future wonderful midriff-baring
hotties. Eventually there'll be bigger and bigger, more and more
attractive pop singers until eventually they'll all explode and the
janitors have to clean up the mess and start all over.
My top 10 reasons NOT to like the Backstreet Boys:
10. They suck
9. They dont write their own music
8. They were taken off the street for their looks, TAUGHT how to sing and dance, and then thrown into the spotlight
7. They suck
6. You've got these guys, NSYNC, AND 98 degrees. How many do you need?
5. They blow
4. What if I said they were all gay?
3. What if I'm right?
2. They suck
1. See reasons 10, 7, and 2
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway,
Has anyone else noticed that the biggest fans of the song
"Pretty Fly(for a White Guy)" are 1.) not Offspring fans at all, and
2.) The subject of the song? But that's a subject for another day,
and another ranting session. Until then, I'm Adam Carolla for Dr.
Drew and Diane Farr saying, "If you're happy and you know it, I hate
you."
