A guide to the west of Ireland town of Sligo
Created | Updated Feb 16, 2002
First off , BEWARE THE LOCALS , that said Sligo is a lovely place to visit.There are several local places for the distribution of alcoholic drinks where the friendly clientel eye you up , walk into you and ask if you're from around here?After you wipe all the blood off your face , go back to your lodgings and change , and remove the bottle that has (though seemingly physically impossible) somehow become lodged in your ear , you may want to visit the niteclubs.
Once inside you will notice that you're the centre of attention for about a microsecond before the crowd engulfs you and propells you towards the ugliest human on Earth (it always happens ....... I should know).If you're asked which football team you support say you don't follow any team because you will tend to notice the tension in the air as the question is asked.Afterwards you may visit one of the local eateries and witness the human mating rituals in action.Don't stare too long as the male may accuse you of 'eyeing'his 'bird' or of being a 'gaylord , perverted queerbag skanger'.On the way home try to avoid the humans lying on the ground describing the cloud patterns , and the one seemingly pouring his innards outwards , or my favorite , the 'wha the ***** are you looking at , I'll kick you're ******** heart in sunshine' shouting youth with the adidas tracksuit bottoms.
Once inside you will notice that you're the centre of attention for about a microsecond before the crowd engulfs you and propells you towards the ugliest human on Earth (it always happens ....... I should know).If you're asked which football team you support say you don't follow any team because you will tend to notice the tension in the air as the question is asked.Afterwards you may visit one of the local eateries and witness the human mating rituals in action.Don't stare too long as the male may accuse you of 'eyeing'his 'bird' or of being a 'gaylord , perverted queerbag skanger'.On the way home try to avoid the humans lying on the ground describing the cloud patterns , and the one seemingly pouring his innards outwards , or my favorite , the 'wha the ***** are you looking at , I'll kick you're ******** heart in sunshine' shouting youth with the adidas tracksuit bottoms.
