An Ode to Santa

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Santa Got A Nippy (Notice of Intended Prosecution)

Santa got a nippy,
Whilst driving down our street,
He must be mad,
To drive that fast,
In all that snow and sleet.

Now Santa’s an expert driver,
As he’s never had a crash,
He done the crime,
He’ll do the time,
And pay the fine, in cash.

But Santa’s got no licence,
And his sleigh no M.O.T.
He’s bad the judge thought,
And summoned him to court,
So the judge, Santa went to see.

There in the dock stood Santa,
With his head bowed to the ground,
He needn't have worried,
Cos' in came, in a hurry,
His brief, Rudolph the reindeer, did bound.

"Your Honour, at the time in question,
He was flying through the air,
So he’s obviously,
Not guilty,
As there’s no speed limit up there".

The judge took Santa’s nippy,
And threw it in the bin,
“Collect your sack”
“And don’t come back”
On Santa’s face a grin.

So Santa went a flyin’
With Rudolph in the lead,
Who’s that up there?
Flying without due care,
Said the man, from the Aviation Authority….

Dedicated to the Memory of Kallista

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