Time Wasting - Practical Applications of (CAC Edition)

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Basic Definition

It is a known fact that timewasting is not timewasting if the wastee in question is actually doing something productive. It is just known as timewasting as they are not doing the task for which they were orginally designated.

An example, at this very moment I am supposed to be researching 19th Century poetic form for purposes we shall not go into now, but instead I am doing the far more highly productive task of adding an entry into this wonderful guide, which with a little time and a whole lot of editing on my part will actually serve a useful purpose unto others. Being that they go 'ah, I am enlightened' or similar nonsense.
Personal preference really.


Now, for the practical purposes of the purported 'timewasting'. Firstly if it is true timewasting where your mind is not actually idle but blazing with the light of invention, then this is good. Bad, because you are not doing the task at hand, but good nevertheless because you are still capable of immense productivity which if developed correctly will have far more worth.

Twas it not written that a Mr. Einstein came up with his theory of relativity in about ten idle minutes, but then took a substantial amount of effort to prove it?

He was still wrong but never mind. (light does not go at a constant speed so I was informed during an earlier timewasting session)

But the fact that he was sat around not doing what he ought to, and still came up with something like that?

Ok another case. Or cases in this case.

It is a known fact that a vast amount of artistic masterpieces, if they were not made for the purposes of garnering money (which lets face it most of them are) were created through boredom and handy art materials.
Leo de Vinci - Most of the stuff he came up with was on his own time when he was supposed to be doing things like finishing that bloody smile. The helicopter for example (his design works on paper but not in reality, but I digress. And he bothered small children, alas)
The internet! Biggest waste of time of the modern age. However the amount of things that get learned when looking at things other than what you are meant to be researching is phenomenal. If instead of pop up adverts we had little flashcards of interesting information the world would be filled with pub quiz champions instead of irate people saying 'Oh gods, not another bloody advert'.

Same people who look at all the porn probably.

Internet Timewasting and Other Annoyances

When doing the oh so technically called 'browsing' or 'surfing' (I bet that name was thought up during a timewasting session) it is indeed possibly to learn everything there is to know about any given subject - provided that it is not the thing you were orignially searching for. In which case you will not find one single site devoted to the subject at hand. Thus the best way to find anything on the internet is obvious - sneak up on it.

Another form of timewasting is another form of browsing. Indeed any sort of browsing is timewasting as you have no pupose in mind and thus are waiting for that fabulous bolt of lightning which will convey you to...well ashdom I suppose. Damn powerful are those bolts of lightning.
Anyway, browsing in a library or bookshop can provide entire new hobbies unto a person, particularly if it is one of those shops or libraries offering manuals in such matters as "Learn Guitar Instantly!" or "Watercolouring for Beginners". This type of timewasting does not provide a useable product, however it does yield the possibility of terribly useful new skills which you would otherwise miss out on because you were doing something 'important'. How many times have you wished you could play poker or the trombone, but you never learned because you never took time out to learn. Sigh, shame on you.
Now this paragraph starting here was begun during a timewasting session during rain avoidance. Which brings me to add another usage - if you appear to be doing something worthwhile when you are not really doing anything then few people will force you out into the weather, unless they are really mean spirited, really hungry or on a timewasting trip of their own, compelled by the fact they are avoiding doing something and thus excise their stress by taking it out on others by upsetting them with demands and questions. Upon encountering these people who lack the imagination to produce something to do do themeselves, give them a sweet of some variety, such as a humbug or glacier mint. This will not only improve their mood and their breath but also provide that little spark of energy to go and do something beautiful AND STOP WASTING TIME!!!!!!!

I thank you.

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