Depression Of A Teenage Mind : An Open Letter
Created | Updated Jul 25, 2006
I don't know about you, but to me depression sums up varied images. To me it could be the goth, clad in monotonous black, the mascara and face powder bringing an eerie chill to the clown without a smile. It could be the fat kid or the kid with glasses that we have all made fun of or laughed at in some way. It could be the people standing in a graveyard, mourning the passing of a loved one. It could be the single mother without enough money for clothes or food to feed her baby.
But I never thought it would be an 18- to 19-year-old lad, with a steady if poorly-paid and boring job, a roof over his head, a girlfriend who loved him, and a supportive family. I never thought the picture of depression would be me.
It started off with what I thought was just plain laziness. I couldn't be bothered doing the simple things like tidying up, washing the dishes and going to the shop. Then I started phoning in sick for work because I couldn't be bothered dragging my backside out of bed. I didn't want to see or talk to anyone. All I wanted to do was sit at home in the dark and play Grand Theft Auto San Andreas. I ate and gained weight. I stopped talking to my friends. In the space of about three months, I'd gone from being an outgoing, confident, guitar-playing hellraiser to a virtual hermit.
So along to the doctor I went. I told him what was going on and he said, 'I think you're suffering from depression'. So the first thing that went through my head was, what do I have to be depressed about?
Four different anti-depressants later, I still hadn't figured it out. So I stopped taking them, though this may not be the best course for everyone.
Now some of you may be asking yourselves, what the point is to this long-winded little story. My point is that now I'm well on the road to recovery and this is all thanks to the support I've had. From my doctor and, most importantly, my friends and family. Depression is not something to be scared of, or hid away from. Depression is a battle, and if you go it alone you're gonna be on the losing side. Talk to someone. A friend, your doctor, a co-worker, a stranger on the end of the phone or in an email to the Samaritans.
But just talk to someone. Because realising you are not alone is the first step to recovery.
But I never thought it would be an 18- to 19-year-old lad, with a steady if poorly-paid and boring job, a roof over his head, a girlfriend who loved him, and a supportive family. I never thought the picture of depression would be me.
It started off with what I thought was just plain laziness. I couldn't be bothered doing the simple things like tidying up, washing the dishes and going to the shop. Then I started phoning in sick for work because I couldn't be bothered dragging my backside out of bed. I didn't want to see or talk to anyone. All I wanted to do was sit at home in the dark and play Grand Theft Auto San Andreas. I ate and gained weight. I stopped talking to my friends. In the space of about three months, I'd gone from being an outgoing, confident, guitar-playing hellraiser to a virtual hermit.
So along to the doctor I went. I told him what was going on and he said, 'I think you're suffering from depression'. So the first thing that went through my head was, what do I have to be depressed about?
Four different anti-depressants later, I still hadn't figured it out. So I stopped taking them, though this may not be the best course for everyone.
Now some of you may be asking yourselves, what the point is to this long-winded little story. My point is that now I'm well on the road to recovery and this is all thanks to the support I've had. From my doctor and, most importantly, my friends and family. Depression is not something to be scared of, or hid away from. Depression is a battle, and if you go it alone you're gonna be on the losing side. Talk to someone. A friend, your doctor, a co-worker, a stranger on the end of the phone or in an email to the Samaritans.
But just talk to someone. Because realising you are not alone is the first step to recovery.
