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The "fan" is a person who finds a person or persons to be perfect for thier person. The person who is being "fan"-ed is often completely unaware, although should the said "fan" scream his/her name loudly as he/she exits his/her aeroplane, it is likely that this will continue as the majority of "fan"-ed people are those who are actively creative participants in popular culture.<p>

"Fan"-dom itself is an art that comes naturally to most people and as such requires no prior knowledge other than a) "He's cute", b) "She's a babe" or, in the 90's, c) I really respect her artistic integrity. If anybody around you says this, feel free to reply "Yeah, right. And I am a walrus." (For anybody who <i>is</i> a walrus, this may be inappropriate).<p>

Often, in what can only be described as a bizarre spectacle, the "fan" will attempt to dress as thier "fan"-ed person, henceforth to be referred to as an "idol", which often looks bizarre. Hair styles, make up and printed t-shirts may all be used in this process of "Fan"-ed worship (sorry, I meant to say Idol worship).<p>

Negative reactions are also good for "fan"-ing. For example, if you would like to be a "Metallica" fan, it may be an idea the next time you are on an aeroplane and the announcement: "That concludes our inflight programming, we will now be showing the latest in adult contempory music for the remainder of the flight." comes on, to clutch your ears in mock-pain and mock-whinge to the person on your left or right. If someone around you admits to being a fan of a conflicting entity (in this case "Metallica" contrast badly with "Suede"), you must "bag them out" (ie insult them).<p>

It should be noted at this point that I am completely against "fan"-ing. But gee, isn't Douglas Adams cute?

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