Book one of Dustotaph - first book of Leocxrulets: Called: Hooversis
Created | Updated Nov 7, 2005
1:1 At the start, determined as without doubt not being at a point after, secondary to, or certainly not the end, the end being any point at a current time not immediately after, preceding or any region directly at the joining of (a minimum of) any 2 points in time one of which does not, cannot and will not exist, there was Dust.
1:2 and the Dust did hold much filth and was dark and dank, and the prophet did see that the dust was dark and dank, and without form, and the prophet did move over the Dust and the dirt thereabout.
1:3 and the prophet said, who hath left the power lead in such a state of entanglement?, Let there be disentanglement: and there was disentanglement.
1:4 And the prophet saw the disentangled power lead, that it was good: and divided the power lead from the plug. And, thought the prophet, mrrily so lettuce rejoice and sucketh mightily.
1:5 And the prophet called the power lead Cable and the plug Plug. And the day after going to the Pub the prophet did awaken with the first hangover.
1:6 And the prophet said let there be an appropriate time for in which to successfully dispatch of the dark and dank Dust of much filth, and let it divide that horrible time known as pub closing from that other horrible time when the big yellow thing floats in the big blue thing, called sunrise. And, thought the prophet, yea, a thousand times yea, lettuce spry happily with much mrrilyness and mirth, and sucketh mightily during this nighthooverly of times.
1:7 And the prophet made an appropriate time for in which to successfully dispatch of the Dust which be both dark and dank, and hold much filth, and it did divide the time between Pub closing from the time of sunrise: and it was so. And, yea, the time did sucketh mightily, for it was wondrous and merrily so.
1:8 And the prophet called the time between Pub Closing and Sunrise Hoovertime, and the next day the prophet awoke with a hangover. But, the prophet saw that this was good, and merrily good, as of a thousand ‘yeas’, and that the time had sucketh most wondrously so, like as is not, for it were that it was, merrily yea.
1:9 And the prophet said, let the peoples in the Pub gather together in one place, and let late opening commence, and it was so.
1:10 And the prophet called the late drinkers Hangers-on and those that left on last orders Light-Weights. And yea, a thousand and 1 yeas, for the prophet did stay late, and sucketh mightily both at pub and at hoovertime.
1:11 And the prophet (slurring only slightly) said, Let the Beat-Nicks bring forth grass, the herb yielding weed, and the Kebab House yielding kebab after late drinkies are all finished and all those that stay on have left, whose chilli sauce is plentiful in itself, upon the pavement let pavement pizza remain: and it was so.
1:12 and the prophet did not awaken the next day till the Sunrise was a many-old thing and the remains of Kebab had dried most unappetisingly, and still the Prophet thought it was good. And yea, merrily so, for the prophet had sucketh mightily as is the way of the prophet, merrily the way is yea so as such.
1:13 and the Evening and morning did indeed seem one, for the prophet had sniffed.
1:14 And the prophet did again visit the Pub in the evening to drink fermented vegetable products and smoke, and yet, the time between pub closing and Sunrise remained productive, even if the prophet couldn’t always remember what the nature of kebab or the hangers-on was, when Sunrise quickly did come upon the prophet once more. And the prophet did indeed loose count. But the prophet did not care for he sucketh mightily night after night, and yea, always was it merrily so.
1:15 And merrily so, the prophet did create a mess, and received a phone call from someone from the pub, the previous evening to whom a promise had apparently been made. And the prophet did ignore this claim, being the prophet this was of ease in function and implementation. And yea, the prophet ignored, and sucketh, and ate more dried kebab the next morn.
1:16 And the Kebab did enter a receptacle, and the prophet saw the receptacle, in double, and decided both that too much had been drunk and that the receptacle, or indeed receptacles were good and called them Dustbin.
1:17 And because the prophet had lost track, it was the nineteenth night before the Prophet remembered the disentangled power lead, called Cable, and the Plug, called Plug, and the Prophet did, after Pub closing, but before sunrise, plug the Plug into the socket and Hoover. And yea, a wondrous thing of a thousand and one and a thousand hence yeas, for sucketh most presently and mightly did the prophet, in non deluded alcohol induced madness, and yea, for it was so, sucketh most pleasurably.
1:18 And the Prophet saw that the dust which did hold much filth and which was dark and dank did vanish. And this was good, and the Prophet could see material lining the floor, and he remembered this was carpet.
1:19 And the Prophet did repeat this, when ever the Carpet was holding Dust of much filth which was Dark and Dank, and this became quite a regular occurrence. And it did seem best to proceed with this procedure immediately after Pub closing but Before Sunrise. And yea, the carpet also saw this, and saw it was good, and merrily the carpet lettuce not forget, for the sucketh of nighthoover were indeed most mightily so, if not that a little unsteady depending, largely on how much of the fermented vegetable products had been consumed, and yea, for the chilli sauce was good and merrily so sucketh the more powerfully after such as consumption.
1:20 And the Prophet did finally think of a name for this, and the Prophet thereby named it, and the name for doing this procedure was A Nighthoover.
And so pleased was the Prophet with this name, and so amazed at leaving the Pub early one night that the prophet took the name Nighthoover. And this was good, and the prophet is Nighthoover.
1:2 and the Dust did hold much filth and was dark and dank, and the prophet did see that the dust was dark and dank, and without form, and the prophet did move over the Dust and the dirt thereabout.
1:3 and the prophet said, who hath left the power lead in such a state of entanglement?, Let there be disentanglement: and there was disentanglement.
1:4 And the prophet saw the disentangled power lead, that it was good: and divided the power lead from the plug. And, thought the prophet, mrrily so lettuce rejoice and sucketh mightily.
1:5 And the prophet called the power lead Cable and the plug Plug. And the day after going to the Pub the prophet did awaken with the first hangover.
1:6 And the prophet said let there be an appropriate time for in which to successfully dispatch of the dark and dank Dust of much filth, and let it divide that horrible time known as pub closing from that other horrible time when the big yellow thing floats in the big blue thing, called sunrise. And, thought the prophet, yea, a thousand times yea, lettuce spry happily with much mrrilyness and mirth, and sucketh mightily during this nighthooverly of times.
1:7 And the prophet made an appropriate time for in which to successfully dispatch of the Dust which be both dark and dank, and hold much filth, and it did divide the time between Pub closing from the time of sunrise: and it was so. And, yea, the time did sucketh mightily, for it was wondrous and merrily so.
1:8 And the prophet called the time between Pub Closing and Sunrise Hoovertime, and the next day the prophet awoke with a hangover. But, the prophet saw that this was good, and merrily good, as of a thousand ‘yeas’, and that the time had sucketh most wondrously so, like as is not, for it were that it was, merrily yea.
1:9 And the prophet said, let the peoples in the Pub gather together in one place, and let late opening commence, and it was so.
1:10 And the prophet called the late drinkers Hangers-on and those that left on last orders Light-Weights. And yea, a thousand and 1 yeas, for the prophet did stay late, and sucketh mightily both at pub and at hoovertime.
1:11 And the prophet (slurring only slightly) said, Let the Beat-Nicks bring forth grass, the herb yielding weed, and the Kebab House yielding kebab after late drinkies are all finished and all those that stay on have left, whose chilli sauce is plentiful in itself, upon the pavement let pavement pizza remain: and it was so.
1:12 and the prophet did not awaken the next day till the Sunrise was a many-old thing and the remains of Kebab had dried most unappetisingly, and still the Prophet thought it was good. And yea, merrily so, for the prophet had sucketh mightily as is the way of the prophet, merrily the way is yea so as such.
1:13 and the Evening and morning did indeed seem one, for the prophet had sniffed.
1:14 And the prophet did again visit the Pub in the evening to drink fermented vegetable products and smoke, and yet, the time between pub closing and Sunrise remained productive, even if the prophet couldn’t always remember what the nature of kebab or the hangers-on was, when Sunrise quickly did come upon the prophet once more. And the prophet did indeed loose count. But the prophet did not care for he sucketh mightily night after night, and yea, always was it merrily so.
1:15 And merrily so, the prophet did create a mess, and received a phone call from someone from the pub, the previous evening to whom a promise had apparently been made. And the prophet did ignore this claim, being the prophet this was of ease in function and implementation. And yea, the prophet ignored, and sucketh, and ate more dried kebab the next morn.
1:16 And the Kebab did enter a receptacle, and the prophet saw the receptacle, in double, and decided both that too much had been drunk and that the receptacle, or indeed receptacles were good and called them Dustbin.
1:17 And because the prophet had lost track, it was the nineteenth night before the Prophet remembered the disentangled power lead, called Cable, and the Plug, called Plug, and the Prophet did, after Pub closing, but before sunrise, plug the Plug into the socket and Hoover. And yea, a wondrous thing of a thousand and one and a thousand hence yeas, for sucketh most presently and mightly did the prophet, in non deluded alcohol induced madness, and yea, for it was so, sucketh most pleasurably.
1:18 And the Prophet saw that the dust which did hold much filth and which was dark and dank did vanish. And this was good, and the Prophet could see material lining the floor, and he remembered this was carpet.
1:19 And the Prophet did repeat this, when ever the Carpet was holding Dust of much filth which was Dark and Dank, and this became quite a regular occurrence. And it did seem best to proceed with this procedure immediately after Pub closing but Before Sunrise. And yea, the carpet also saw this, and saw it was good, and merrily the carpet lettuce not forget, for the sucketh of nighthoover were indeed most mightily so, if not that a little unsteady depending, largely on how much of the fermented vegetable products had been consumed, and yea, for the chilli sauce was good and merrily so sucketh the more powerfully after such as consumption.
1:20 And the Prophet did finally think of a name for this, and the Prophet thereby named it, and the name for doing this procedure was A Nighthoover.
And so pleased was the Prophet with this name, and so amazed at leaving the Pub early one night that the prophet took the name Nighthoover. And this was good, and the prophet is Nighthoover.
