Project DESERT
Created | Updated Jul 28, 2003
THis is the second of the two super hero stories I've written!
[Int the kitchen of the Super Headquaters. Early morning]
Super Jinkies is making herself a bowl of Fruitee-Os
Super Jinkies: (pouring milk) Now let's see. (reads box) Color dye, and card board, yum-yum the breakfast of the champions.
(Well, excuse me! For your information the budget wouldn't allow for the expensive cereal!!!)
Suddenly the sunroof crashes.
Super Jinkies: We have the budget to break a sunroof, but not for a decent breakfast!?
(Yes)
Ninja llamas jump down through the sunroof. Super Jinkies tries to fight them off, but there are too many.
****
[Int. kitchen hours later.]
Gooseman, Super Bufanda and Captain Phenomenal walk in. A janitor is sweeping glass.
Super Bufanda: What happened here!?
Janitor: I don't make 'em; I just clean 'em.
CP: Look a note!
Gooseman: (reading the note) We've got Super Jinkies! Stay out of our plans!
Super Bufanda: We have to save her!
Gooseman: We can't; we only number three!
Super Bufanda: Ahh, so?
CP leans over and whispers something into Super Bufanda ear!
Super Bufanda: Great Garrisons! You're right! We'll need a fourth person! (pointing) You!
Janitor: (looking up) First of all, Mister Exclamation Marks, I don't have super powers and secondly who's going to clean up this mess?
Super Bufanda: No time to argue; just grab my nose!
The janitor suspiciously pulls at Super Bufanda's nose. Suddenly, a dodgy CGI twister whirls around the janitor.
Janitor: (the tornado whirls down to reveal a man wearing latex gloves on his hands and head) I am Latex Glove Man!!!!
THe other heroes roll their eyes.
Super Bufanda: Quickly to the....
CP: Firstly we all can fly, and secondly this gag's already done
Super Bufanda: Awww, please just this once!
A lawyery figure walks in.
Lawyer: I'm from the Carol, Carolor, Caroling law office, I am Lord Mills' solicitor, and....
Gooseman: Yes we all know where this pun's going. Let's get outta here!
Our heroes fly off!
**
[Int. secret Lab/Dungeon thingie]
Super Jinkies is lying in a cell with no visible bars. She attempts to exit but is met with a surprising shock.
Voice: Ahh, our guest is awake!
Super Jinkies: I guessed it was you. Your ninja llamas were a bit obvious. What I don't understand, Master Camel, is why you kidnapped me?
Master Camel: (a mutated half man half dromedary camel) Well, my dear, that's just one of the many plot holes that will have to be worked on; isn't it?
Super Jinkies: What makes you think I'll just sit here being captured?
Master Camel: The walls are made of quarkium and the door's protected by a quarkium radiate field. Quite impenetrable to your, err, superness!
Super Jinkies: Quarkium? Some one's gotten themselves a stellar compressor; haven't they?
Master Camel: Umm, I got it on Ebay!
Super Jinkies: Ebay, eh, and here I've only been using Ebay to get collector Doctor Who novels!
[End of Scene]
Super Jinkies: WHat happened to the asterisks?
(Flying monkeys stole them. We, the production staff, are looking for the extra ones but for now I'll just be saying, "End of scene.")
Super Jinkies: (suspicously) Riight.
[End of end of scene, err, scene. I can't believe I'm getting paid to say....]
[Ext. Alpacas Ruinas, Chile]
Latex Glove Man: So this is where Master Camel is holding Super Jinkies?
Super Bufanda: Yes, it is.
Gooseman: (confused) Wait a second, how did we ascertain the personage of Super Jinkies' abductor, let alone the location of his hideout?
CP: Don't you remember the secret, deleted scene where we determined all of that from a cryptic clue on a piece of glass?
Gooseman : (gleam of recognition) Of course, I'm such a dunder head!
Super Bufanda: Err, yes you are.
Gooseman: Really?
Super Bufanda: (killing an already awkward moment) Shhh! Llama guards!
LGM: WHat's the plan?
CP: We rush in, kick some llama booty while you stay here and twiddle your thumbs.
LGM nods in approval. The super heroes rush in and start kicking ninja llama butt, but (hehe I said but twice in a row) LGM also rushes in thus fouling the operation. A llama guard gets away and a alarm sounds.
CP: (angry) Are you totally inane!?
LGM: (shrugging shoulders) I'm a latex glove based super hero, what did you expect?
Gooseman: HE's got you there!
Super Bufanda: (does a Golden Girls double take before returning to the legitimate plot) We haven't failed yet but we better get in the ruins.
THey enter the ruins.
LGM: Holy Catacombs! It's dark in here!
Gooseman: (Err, I think, I can't really see) Hey, narrator, could we have a little light in here, please?
(sure)
[Int. torchlit ruins]
Gooseman: THanks!
(You're welcome)
Super Bufanda: (Reading obviously helpful sign) To secet laboratory/dungeon of Master Camel turn left and go through the door at the end of the hall. Well that obviously helpful sign was obviously helpful!
Our heroes turn left and walk down the corridor until they enter...(dum, dum, dada) The not quite as secret as it used to be Laboratory/Dungeon of Master Camel!
Gooseman: Well, that was suitably over dramatic!
(watch it Goose boy!)
The lab/dugeon had agiant lasery thing and, super computers and other evil lab stuff. They see Super Jinkies.
CP: Don't worry, I'll save you with my Phenomesphere!!
Super Jinkies: Don't waste your.......
An orange sphere blares into the quarkium radiate field.
Super Bufanda: I'll use my psionic amplifying scarf to brush that field away!
He gets the same result.
Gooseman: I'll use my magic goose down blizzard!!!!
Do I even have to say it?
Master Camel: (walking venomously froma particularly shadowy shadow) Those were good tries but I'm afraid that you're all impotent to save her. And look at what I've got!
He holds up LGM.
LGM: I was doing great and then my powers pooped out!
Super Bufanda: Your super batteries must be draining.
LGM: My what?
Super Bufanda: At the 1997 conference between the International Council Of Villains Existing Terrestrially and the Mega International Group Of Super Heroes it was decided that all super deputies would have a defined finite amount of super powers.
Master Camel: It was known as the Deputy Accords!
Super Bufanda: You were there?
Master Camel: Of course! I was the ICOVET's head secretary
Super Bufanda: What a coincidence! I was taking the minutes for the MIGOSH!
LGM: (raising hands and yelling) As much as I am for for both reminiscences and acronyms; I'm afraid I'll have to break up this trip down memory lane and remind you that I'm in the hands of a mad scientist and a friend is behind an impenetrable energy field!
MAster Camel: Oooh your friend'd right, ninja llamas attack!!!!!
Immediately the room's filled with llamas. They fight valiantly but they are out numbered (this is a little monotonous) and beaten down.
Super Bufanda: Must...Send...Super....SOS!!!
Our heroes are placed behind the radiate field.
****
(see we found the extra asterisks)
[Int. Goody Oaks Retirement Place, Tampa Bay, Florid]
Three, old figures are sitting in rocking chairs, watching the pidgeons walk by. Suddenly, one snaps to awareness.
1st oldster: Did you here that?
2nd oldster: (shouting) What?
3rd oldster: (shouting twice as loud) He said, "Did you hear that?"
2nd oldster: (shouting) No, I'm not afraid of bats!
The other two roll their eyes.
3rd oldster: What'd ya hear, Ecoman?
Ecoman: (1st oldster) Well, if it wasn't my hearing aid malfunctioning, then it could be the Super SOS?
2nd oldster: Yes, we used to be the best of the best.
3rd oldster: For crying out loud, Dr. Atomic, turn on your hearing aid!
Dr. Atomic: (2nd oldster) Aye, aye, the bearing's laid!
The third oldster reaches over and cranks on Dr. Atomic's hearing aid control.
3rd oldster: Now shut up and listen. Ecoman here thinks he's heard the Super SOS!
Dr. Atomic: Why do you always tell Super CPA stuff before me!?
Ecoman: (frustrated) Because, you never have your hearing aid on!
Dr. Atomic: (getting up) Welp let's go. I'd like to get back before early bird special at Murphy's starts.
The oldsters get up and hover off.
*** (Hey, you monkeys give that back!!!)
[Int Master Camel's Lab/Dungeon]
Super Jinkies: -n't good is it?
(sorry came in a late there)
Super Bufanda: How are we going to get out of this?
CP: If we knew that, there'd be no need for the rest of the story!
LGM: (now reverted back to the janitor) Well, if it wasn't for your Deputy Accords, we'd be kickin' butt now!!!
Gooseman: Rules are there for a reason!
Master Camel is running around laughing with insane maniacalness. Suddenly, the great, big sunroof (what the heck? A sunroof in an underground lair set in Incan ruins!) thuds three times before cracking visibly and breaking.
Master Camel: What the heck?
Ecoman: It is us; the Supra Calvacade!!!! We'd have been here sooner, but Dr. Atomic had to make a pit stop in Aruba.
Dr. Atomic: Sooorry, but that prune smoothy went right through me!
Super CPA: I told you not to drink it!
Super Jinkies: I think we're in trouble.
Janitor: Why?
Super Bufanda: The last time the Supra Calvacade fought crime it was in 1952 and that was when Ecoman tripped Shrimpster with a shuffleboard shuffle plate!
Super CPA: (growlingly) Just because we're a little older doesn't mean we can't hear! I've got Super executive hearing and with my hearing aid all the way up I can hear a guy talking across a room, that is if there isn't a lot of background noise.
Super Jinkies: Do I need any more evidence?
Ever since the Calvacade's entrance MAster Camel has been rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably.
Dr. Atomic: Do you find something funny, whippersnapper?
Master Camel: Quite! It's time to, ahhh...,ahh, Haha, to get rid of you!
An army of ninja llamas fill the room, and the fight scene commences. Surprisingly the Supra Calvacade repel the Llamas.
Ecoman: See, we're not so useless! Now, youngman, it's your turn to feel the pain that is ummm,ummm, oh drat, how'd that go?
Super CPA: (suggestingly) Painful?
Ecoman: Oh, that's right!
Dr. Atomic: Wrath of atomic power!
WE see the view from Dr. Atomic. There's four blurry objects.
Dr. Atomic: Damn these cataracts!
He through the atomic ball striking Ecoman, and knocking him to the floor.
Super CPA: Feel the power of the power briefcase!
HE raises a glowing briefcase and flies seemingly fast at Master Camel, but when the camera angle changes we see that he is actually moving at a snail's pace. Master Camel steps to one side and Super CPA swings and misses, and begins to spin uncontrollably. HE changes direction and pulls Dr. Atomic into the whirl and they both hit Ecoman. Master Camel flips a convenient switch. A glass globe encompasses the Calvacade.
Super Jinkies: THat's something no one should ever have to see.
**
[Int. same place with time extension]
Master Camel: Now, my dear Super Jinkies, it's time to close that mercilessly large plothole!
Super Jinkies: You mean you've figured out why you kidnapped me?
Master Camel: Umm, yes!
Super Jinkies: (folding arms) Well, let's hear it.
Master Camel: In your hat is the access codes to all the satelites which I will use in in my project of Dehydration Enhancing Satellites Energercally Radiating Thermalescence, or DESERT!
Janitor: (twirling finger in the air) Yay, another acronym!
Super jinkies: Oh, they're fun!
Master Camel: Miss Jinkies, hand over the codes.
A tray opens in the cell and Super jinkies places a CD in it the tray closes. MAster Camel grabs the CD, does a jig and rushes to the computer.
*
[Int glass globe]
Dr. Atomic: Well, we'll miss Murphy's early bird special.
Super CPA: Maybe not, Ecoman, didn't you train some penguins in self defense?
Ecoman: Yes, in the 1960s.
Super CPA: Well.....
Dr. Atomic: I remeber getting water out of the well, damn tedious that....
Ecoman: (ignoring Dr. Atomic) Of course the Penguin call!!!!
Ecoman cups his hands over his mouth. Suddenly, an army of penguins were in the dungeon/lab.
MAster Camel: Ninja llamas, protect me!
Soon there's a major battle scene with CGI armies. The penguins save Super JInkies and the others in the cell. With the heroes freed the DESERT countdown starts. MAster Camel escapes out of a convenient escape hatch. The heroes are torn between catching Master Camel and stopping the count down.
Super Bufanda: I'm torn between....
Others: WE know!!!
Super Jinkies: I'll stop the countdown and you guys stop the humback of Alpacas Ruinas.
Super Jinkies wades through a sea of penguins and llamas to get at the computer. The others rush after Master Camel. They close in on him. Master Camel turns for the last confrontation.
Super Bufanda: WHy go through all this trouble to get these satellites to make the world a desert?
Master Camel: Because A: I'm am evil villain B: I'm a camelesque creature and C: I want to rule the world!!!
Gooseman: Those are good reasons!
CP: None the less we are contracted to stop you!!!
Master Camel: Unfortunately that won't be happening!
Suddnely, a humpbacked jet rises up from an underground hangar. MAster Camel gets in and the jet takes off.
Janitor: (bewildered) Aren't you going after him?
Super Bufanda: (puts hand on the janitor's shoulder) Don't worry, we'll get him next time, maybe.
[End scene (I hate flying monkeys)]
[Int Dungeon/lab]
Intercom: 10,9,8,6...
Super Jinkies: You skipped seven!!
Intercom: Sorry, 8,7,6,5,4,3,2..
Super Jinkies presses in the final abort code.
Intercom: 1. Infrared conversion complete, thank you for shopping with Destructomart.
Super Jinkies: That's not right!
Intercom: Oh drat, I'm reading the alternate ending script, just a sec'. 1, Infrared conversion aborted.
Everyone cheers. The Chilean police arrive and arrest the llamas. Our heroes enter.
Super Bufanda: We've made the world safe once again!
Gooseman: It makes a goose/human hybrid feel good to know that.
CP: Quite true.
Super Jinkies: Now I can finish my bowl of (ack) Fruitee-os.
They fly off, carrying the janitor.
[End of scene] (mfflamffamfdmasmdf!@@#@@!#$#)
[Ext mid flight]
Super Bufanda: I get the distinct feeling that we've forgot something!
back in the lab
Dr. Atomic: I told you we'd miss the early bird special.
Ecoman: Hold your dentures on the penguins have nearly flipped the switch!
Super CPA: THey'd best hurry my water pills staring to take hold!!!
THe oldsters frantically yell at the penguins to hurry.
******** (Now they bring back the ------- astersiks, those --------- flying---------ing monkeys.)
[Int the kitchen of the Super Headquaters. Early morning]
Super Jinkies is making herself a bowl of Fruitee-Os
Super Jinkies: (pouring milk) Now let's see. (reads box) Color dye, and card board, yum-yum the breakfast of the champions.
(Well, excuse me! For your information the budget wouldn't allow for the expensive cereal!!!)
Suddenly the sunroof crashes.
Super Jinkies: We have the budget to break a sunroof, but not for a decent breakfast!?
(Yes)
Ninja llamas jump down through the sunroof. Super Jinkies tries to fight them off, but there are too many.
****
[Int. kitchen hours later.]
Gooseman, Super Bufanda and Captain Phenomenal walk in. A janitor is sweeping glass.
Super Bufanda: What happened here!?
Janitor: I don't make 'em; I just clean 'em.
CP: Look a note!
Gooseman: (reading the note) We've got Super Jinkies! Stay out of our plans!
Super Bufanda: We have to save her!
Gooseman: We can't; we only number three!
Super Bufanda: Ahh, so?
CP leans over and whispers something into Super Bufanda ear!
Super Bufanda: Great Garrisons! You're right! We'll need a fourth person! (pointing) You!
Janitor: (looking up) First of all, Mister Exclamation Marks, I don't have super powers and secondly who's going to clean up this mess?
Super Bufanda: No time to argue; just grab my nose!
The janitor suspiciously pulls at Super Bufanda's nose. Suddenly, a dodgy CGI twister whirls around the janitor.
Janitor: (the tornado whirls down to reveal a man wearing latex gloves on his hands and head) I am Latex Glove Man!!!!
THe other heroes roll their eyes.
Super Bufanda: Quickly to the....
CP: Firstly we all can fly, and secondly this gag's already done
Super Bufanda: Awww, please just this once!
A lawyery figure walks in.
Lawyer: I'm from the Carol, Carolor, Caroling law office, I am Lord Mills' solicitor, and....
Gooseman: Yes we all know where this pun's going. Let's get outta here!
Our heroes fly off!
**
[Int. secret Lab/Dungeon thingie]
Super Jinkies is lying in a cell with no visible bars. She attempts to exit but is met with a surprising shock.
Voice: Ahh, our guest is awake!
Super Jinkies: I guessed it was you. Your ninja llamas were a bit obvious. What I don't understand, Master Camel, is why you kidnapped me?
Master Camel: (a mutated half man half dromedary camel) Well, my dear, that's just one of the many plot holes that will have to be worked on; isn't it?
Super Jinkies: What makes you think I'll just sit here being captured?
Master Camel: The walls are made of quarkium and the door's protected by a quarkium radiate field. Quite impenetrable to your, err, superness!
Super Jinkies: Quarkium? Some one's gotten themselves a stellar compressor; haven't they?
Master Camel: Umm, I got it on Ebay!
Super Jinkies: Ebay, eh, and here I've only been using Ebay to get collector Doctor Who novels!
[End of Scene]
Super Jinkies: WHat happened to the asterisks?
(Flying monkeys stole them. We, the production staff, are looking for the extra ones but for now I'll just be saying, "End of scene.")
Super Jinkies: (suspicously) Riight.
[End of end of scene, err, scene. I can't believe I'm getting paid to say....]
[Ext. Alpacas Ruinas, Chile]
Latex Glove Man: So this is where Master Camel is holding Super Jinkies?
Super Bufanda: Yes, it is.
Gooseman: (confused) Wait a second, how did we ascertain the personage of Super Jinkies' abductor, let alone the location of his hideout?
CP: Don't you remember the secret, deleted scene where we determined all of that from a cryptic clue on a piece of glass?
Gooseman : (gleam of recognition) Of course, I'm such a dunder head!
Super Bufanda: Err, yes you are.
Gooseman: Really?
Super Bufanda: (killing an already awkward moment) Shhh! Llama guards!
LGM: WHat's the plan?
CP: We rush in, kick some llama booty while you stay here and twiddle your thumbs.
LGM nods in approval. The super heroes rush in and start kicking ninja llama butt, but (hehe I said but twice in a row) LGM also rushes in thus fouling the operation. A llama guard gets away and a alarm sounds.
CP: (angry) Are you totally inane!?
LGM: (shrugging shoulders) I'm a latex glove based super hero, what did you expect?
Gooseman: HE's got you there!
Super Bufanda: (does a Golden Girls double take before returning to the legitimate plot) We haven't failed yet but we better get in the ruins.
THey enter the ruins.
LGM: Holy Catacombs! It's dark in here!
Gooseman: (Err, I think, I can't really see) Hey, narrator, could we have a little light in here, please?
(sure)
[Int. torchlit ruins]
Gooseman: THanks!
(You're welcome)
Super Bufanda: (Reading obviously helpful sign) To secet laboratory/dungeon of Master Camel turn left and go through the door at the end of the hall. Well that obviously helpful sign was obviously helpful!
Our heroes turn left and walk down the corridor until they enter...(dum, dum, dada) The not quite as secret as it used to be Laboratory/Dungeon of Master Camel!
Gooseman: Well, that was suitably over dramatic!
(watch it Goose boy!)
The lab/dugeon had agiant lasery thing and, super computers and other evil lab stuff. They see Super Jinkies.
CP: Don't worry, I'll save you with my Phenomesphere!!
Super Jinkies: Don't waste your.......
An orange sphere blares into the quarkium radiate field.
Super Bufanda: I'll use my psionic amplifying scarf to brush that field away!
He gets the same result.
Gooseman: I'll use my magic goose down blizzard!!!!
Do I even have to say it?
Master Camel: (walking venomously froma particularly shadowy shadow) Those were good tries but I'm afraid that you're all impotent to save her. And look at what I've got!
He holds up LGM.
LGM: I was doing great and then my powers pooped out!
Super Bufanda: Your super batteries must be draining.
LGM: My what?
Super Bufanda: At the 1997 conference between the International Council Of Villains Existing Terrestrially and the Mega International Group Of Super Heroes it was decided that all super deputies would have a defined finite amount of super powers.
Master Camel: It was known as the Deputy Accords!
Super Bufanda: You were there?
Master Camel: Of course! I was the ICOVET's head secretary
Super Bufanda: What a coincidence! I was taking the minutes for the MIGOSH!
LGM: (raising hands and yelling) As much as I am for for both reminiscences and acronyms; I'm afraid I'll have to break up this trip down memory lane and remind you that I'm in the hands of a mad scientist and a friend is behind an impenetrable energy field!
MAster Camel: Oooh your friend'd right, ninja llamas attack!!!!!
Immediately the room's filled with llamas. They fight valiantly but they are out numbered (this is a little monotonous) and beaten down.
Super Bufanda: Must...Send...Super....SOS!!!
Our heroes are placed behind the radiate field.
****
(see we found the extra asterisks)
[Int. Goody Oaks Retirement Place, Tampa Bay, Florid]
Three, old figures are sitting in rocking chairs, watching the pidgeons walk by. Suddenly, one snaps to awareness.
1st oldster: Did you here that?
2nd oldster: (shouting) What?
3rd oldster: (shouting twice as loud) He said, "Did you hear that?"
2nd oldster: (shouting) No, I'm not afraid of bats!
The other two roll their eyes.
3rd oldster: What'd ya hear, Ecoman?
Ecoman: (1st oldster) Well, if it wasn't my hearing aid malfunctioning, then it could be the Super SOS?
2nd oldster: Yes, we used to be the best of the best.
3rd oldster: For crying out loud, Dr. Atomic, turn on your hearing aid!
Dr. Atomic: (2nd oldster) Aye, aye, the bearing's laid!
The third oldster reaches over and cranks on Dr. Atomic's hearing aid control.
3rd oldster: Now shut up and listen. Ecoman here thinks he's heard the Super SOS!
Dr. Atomic: Why do you always tell Super CPA stuff before me!?
Ecoman: (frustrated) Because, you never have your hearing aid on!
Dr. Atomic: (getting up) Welp let's go. I'd like to get back before early bird special at Murphy's starts.
The oldsters get up and hover off.
*** (Hey, you monkeys give that back!!!)
[Int Master Camel's Lab/Dungeon]
Super Jinkies: -n't good is it?
(sorry came in a late there)
Super Bufanda: How are we going to get out of this?
CP: If we knew that, there'd be no need for the rest of the story!
LGM: (now reverted back to the janitor) Well, if it wasn't for your Deputy Accords, we'd be kickin' butt now!!!
Gooseman: Rules are there for a reason!
Master Camel is running around laughing with insane maniacalness. Suddenly, the great, big sunroof (what the heck? A sunroof in an underground lair set in Incan ruins!) thuds three times before cracking visibly and breaking.
Master Camel: What the heck?
Ecoman: It is us; the Supra Calvacade!!!! We'd have been here sooner, but Dr. Atomic had to make a pit stop in Aruba.
Dr. Atomic: Sooorry, but that prune smoothy went right through me!
Super CPA: I told you not to drink it!
Super Jinkies: I think we're in trouble.
Janitor: Why?
Super Bufanda: The last time the Supra Calvacade fought crime it was in 1952 and that was when Ecoman tripped Shrimpster with a shuffleboard shuffle plate!
Super CPA: (growlingly) Just because we're a little older doesn't mean we can't hear! I've got Super executive hearing and with my hearing aid all the way up I can hear a guy talking across a room, that is if there isn't a lot of background noise.
Super Jinkies: Do I need any more evidence?
Ever since the Calvacade's entrance MAster Camel has been rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably.
Dr. Atomic: Do you find something funny, whippersnapper?
Master Camel: Quite! It's time to, ahhh...,ahh, Haha, to get rid of you!
An army of ninja llamas fill the room, and the fight scene commences. Surprisingly the Supra Calvacade repel the Llamas.
Ecoman: See, we're not so useless! Now, youngman, it's your turn to feel the pain that is ummm,ummm, oh drat, how'd that go?
Super CPA: (suggestingly) Painful?
Ecoman: Oh, that's right!
Dr. Atomic: Wrath of atomic power!
WE see the view from Dr. Atomic. There's four blurry objects.
Dr. Atomic: Damn these cataracts!
He through the atomic ball striking Ecoman, and knocking him to the floor.
Super CPA: Feel the power of the power briefcase!
HE raises a glowing briefcase and flies seemingly fast at Master Camel, but when the camera angle changes we see that he is actually moving at a snail's pace. Master Camel steps to one side and Super CPA swings and misses, and begins to spin uncontrollably. HE changes direction and pulls Dr. Atomic into the whirl and they both hit Ecoman. Master Camel flips a convenient switch. A glass globe encompasses the Calvacade.
Super Jinkies: THat's something no one should ever have to see.
**
[Int. same place with time extension]
Master Camel: Now, my dear Super Jinkies, it's time to close that mercilessly large plothole!
Super Jinkies: You mean you've figured out why you kidnapped me?
Master Camel: Umm, yes!
Super Jinkies: (folding arms) Well, let's hear it.
Master Camel: In your hat is the access codes to all the satelites which I will use in in my project of Dehydration Enhancing Satellites Energercally Radiating Thermalescence, or DESERT!
Janitor: (twirling finger in the air) Yay, another acronym!
Super jinkies: Oh, they're fun!
Master Camel: Miss Jinkies, hand over the codes.
A tray opens in the cell and Super jinkies places a CD in it the tray closes. MAster Camel grabs the CD, does a jig and rushes to the computer.
*
[Int glass globe]
Dr. Atomic: Well, we'll miss Murphy's early bird special.
Super CPA: Maybe not, Ecoman, didn't you train some penguins in self defense?
Ecoman: Yes, in the 1960s.
Super CPA: Well.....
Dr. Atomic: I remeber getting water out of the well, damn tedious that....
Ecoman: (ignoring Dr. Atomic) Of course the Penguin call!!!!
Ecoman cups his hands over his mouth. Suddenly, an army of penguins were in the dungeon/lab.
MAster Camel: Ninja llamas, protect me!
Soon there's a major battle scene with CGI armies. The penguins save Super JInkies and the others in the cell. With the heroes freed the DESERT countdown starts. MAster Camel escapes out of a convenient escape hatch. The heroes are torn between catching Master Camel and stopping the count down.
Super Bufanda: I'm torn between....
Others: WE know!!!
Super Jinkies: I'll stop the countdown and you guys stop the humback of Alpacas Ruinas.
Super Jinkies wades through a sea of penguins and llamas to get at the computer. The others rush after Master Camel. They close in on him. Master Camel turns for the last confrontation.
Super Bufanda: WHy go through all this trouble to get these satellites to make the world a desert?
Master Camel: Because A: I'm am evil villain B: I'm a camelesque creature and C: I want to rule the world!!!
Gooseman: Those are good reasons!
CP: None the less we are contracted to stop you!!!
Master Camel: Unfortunately that won't be happening!
Suddnely, a humpbacked jet rises up from an underground hangar. MAster Camel gets in and the jet takes off.
Janitor: (bewildered) Aren't you going after him?
Super Bufanda: (puts hand on the janitor's shoulder) Don't worry, we'll get him next time, maybe.
[End scene (I hate flying monkeys)]
[Int Dungeon/lab]
Intercom: 10,9,8,6...
Super Jinkies: You skipped seven!!
Intercom: Sorry, 8,7,6,5,4,3,2..
Super Jinkies presses in the final abort code.
Intercom: 1. Infrared conversion complete, thank you for shopping with Destructomart.
Super Jinkies: That's not right!
Intercom: Oh drat, I'm reading the alternate ending script, just a sec'. 1, Infrared conversion aborted.
Everyone cheers. The Chilean police arrive and arrest the llamas. Our heroes enter.
Super Bufanda: We've made the world safe once again!
Gooseman: It makes a goose/human hybrid feel good to know that.
CP: Quite true.
Super Jinkies: Now I can finish my bowl of (ack) Fruitee-os.
They fly off, carrying the janitor.
[End of scene] (mfflamffamfdmasmdf!@@#@@!#$#)
[Ext mid flight]
Super Bufanda: I get the distinct feeling that we've forgot something!
back in the lab
Dr. Atomic: I told you we'd miss the early bird special.
Ecoman: Hold your dentures on the penguins have nearly flipped the switch!
Super CPA: THey'd best hurry my water pills staring to take hold!!!
THe oldsters frantically yell at the penguins to hurry.
******** (Now they bring back the ------- astersiks, those --------- flying---------ing monkeys.)
