Merry Christmas Doctor
Created | Updated Jun 5, 2003
Merry Christmas Doctor
By John Matts, Mike Mills, Matt Quaterstein and Andrew Smith
Based on an idea by John Matts
One day the Doctor was out walking k-9 when he came across a giant advent calendar. The doctor checked the date on his watch and found out it was the 5th. The doctor opened the first flap and out came a Dalek disguised as a Christmas tree. As he dodged the deadly blasts from the Dalek's special Glitter Gun the Doctor noticed a sign around its neck. It read:
BURTONS-LARGEST STOCKIST OF DOCTOR WHO BOOKS
"I think we could be in trouble K9..."
The Doctor reached into his pockets and pulled out a mince pie.
"Would you like it?" he asked his oldest foe. "I wouldn't usually give you a present, but it is Christmas after all"
"Do not move!" grated the Dalek, pre-emptively spraying out a shower of glitter.
"Oh, but I don't need to move" the Doctor reassured him. "You can suck up the mince pie with your sucker arm."
The Dalek did not reply.
"Go on" the Doctor urged. "It's full of jellybabies! You like jellybabies, don't you?"
"Exterminate!" yelled the Dalek as it vaporised the Mince Pie.
"That wasn't very nice." sobbed the Doctor. Suddenly an idea came to him. "Ha Ha" exclaimed the doctor as he plugged in the Dalek to an overloaded socket. Soon the Metal meanie began to shake and quiver as its christmas tree lights exploded.
"MY VISION IS IMPARED! I CAN NOT SEE!"
Well, don't you make a charming Christmas Tree" noted the Doctor, reaching into his pockets once more.
He produced a badge of golden star. A battered old star for mathematical excellence. He put it on top of the quivering Dalek.
"There!" said the Doctor. "Now all we need is some Tinsel." he produced some from his pocket and wrapped it around the Dalek like he did his long scarf each morning.
The Dalek, meanwhile was beginning to cook inside it's shell. Green goop began to pour out from it's casing. The Doctor picked up a wine glass and filled it with the substance.
"Here's a toast" he said. "A happy Christmas K9"
"Master" K9 acknowledged.
Then the Doctor looked at you. Yes, YOU. You reading this post.
"Incidentally, a happy Christmas to all of you at Cult tv net!"
Witnessing the hurendous death of its Dalek comrade, the Cyberman which had disguised itself as a yule log snuck quitely away...
By John Matts, Mike Mills, Matt Quaterstein and Andrew Smith
Based on an idea by John Matts
One day the Doctor was out walking k-9 when he came across a giant advent calendar. The doctor checked the date on his watch and found out it was the 5th. The doctor opened the first flap and out came a Dalek disguised as a Christmas tree. As he dodged the deadly blasts from the Dalek's special Glitter Gun the Doctor noticed a sign around its neck. It read:
BURTONS-LARGEST STOCKIST OF DOCTOR WHO BOOKS
"I think we could be in trouble K9..."
The Doctor reached into his pockets and pulled out a mince pie.
"Would you like it?" he asked his oldest foe. "I wouldn't usually give you a present, but it is Christmas after all"
"Do not move!" grated the Dalek, pre-emptively spraying out a shower of glitter.
"Oh, but I don't need to move" the Doctor reassured him. "You can suck up the mince pie with your sucker arm."
The Dalek did not reply.
"Go on" the Doctor urged. "It's full of jellybabies! You like jellybabies, don't you?"
"Exterminate!" yelled the Dalek as it vaporised the Mince Pie.
"That wasn't very nice." sobbed the Doctor. Suddenly an idea came to him. "Ha Ha" exclaimed the doctor as he plugged in the Dalek to an overloaded socket. Soon the Metal meanie began to shake and quiver as its christmas tree lights exploded.
"MY VISION IS IMPARED! I CAN NOT SEE!"
Well, don't you make a charming Christmas Tree" noted the Doctor, reaching into his pockets once more.
He produced a badge of golden star. A battered old star for mathematical excellence. He put it on top of the quivering Dalek.
"There!" said the Doctor. "Now all we need is some Tinsel." he produced some from his pocket and wrapped it around the Dalek like he did his long scarf each morning.
The Dalek, meanwhile was beginning to cook inside it's shell. Green goop began to pour out from it's casing. The Doctor picked up a wine glass and filled it with the substance.
"Here's a toast" he said. "A happy Christmas K9"
"Master" K9 acknowledged.
Then the Doctor looked at you. Yes, YOU. You reading this post.
"Incidentally, a happy Christmas to all of you at Cult tv net!"
Witnessing the hurendous death of its Dalek comrade, the Cyberman which had disguised itself as a yule log snuck quitely away...
