Alcohol
Created | Updated Apr 25, 2002
Without its calming depressants, journalists would go insane by having to report
about the crazy world about them. By seeing the world through beer-tinted glasses (commonly known as "beer-goggles"),
they are able to cope with the enormous depravity that they are forced to witness.
Alcohol also comes in useful when journalists are punched by angry celebrities,
another foul aberration of nature that journalists are forced to meet.